So, About the “Freedom of Conscience” Petition UPDATED

The Freedom of Conscience petition

Good news! “The Petition” is now number three on the list of “popular” petitions over at the White House website. Who would have thought it possible, given it’s humble origins? [Read more...]

The President Remarks About Our Petition…Bravo Zulu

“I can’t believe Frank Weathers brought that petition into my den, and then shot it clear through the ceiling, and it’s headed to the Moon. That is awesome.”

No. God is awesome, and so are all the folks who took the time and effort to sign the little petition that could. You’ve heard me say it once, and I’ve said it a million times. Bravo Zulu, to all of you. BZ, BZ, BZ. [Read more...]

Have You Purchased Your Susan G. Komen Pistol Yet? UPDATED

Aw…ain’t it cute? OK, file this one under the “Truth is stranger than fiction” category. Because it’s for real. [Read more...]

If You Sign the Petition on the HHS Mandate…

You’ll be joining a long line of patriots who have not knuckled under to bullies and oppressors. Like the guys from Delta House, remember? I’ll let Otter, in his impassioned speech before the Pan-Hellenic Bushwah Court of Incompetents, remind us of what is at stake here. [Read more...]

Do What Father Zuhlsdorf Commands…

Like a good Jedi. The Empire has conspired to turn the moon into a Deathstar, see,  and your support is needed to turn this:

Neat, but no Hyper-drive

 

into this:

"She's fast enough for you, Old Man."

 

Yes, this is the petition you are looking for. Sign it, and share it.

That is all.

 

A Word From Your Captain: The USCCB Has Noticed The Petition

Via radio transmission from the U.S.S. Freedom of Conscience, Joe Six-Pack, USMC, Commanding

Howdy folks. This is a mighty wild ride, and let me tell you, the FoC is a rockin’ and rollin’! But the reason I’m calling you in mid-flight is this: I just wanted to thank each one of you who have signed, or shared, or posted the little link that shows the Administration that we believe in the First Amendment, and the whole rest of the Constitution. If you haven’t had the opportunity to sign it yet, here’s as good a reason I’ll ever have to try and push you into action: our Bishops have got our backs on this one. Lookee here: [Read more...]

Why God Created the Shotgun

So cool and geeky nano-bot engineers can watch ignorant Marines with high school degrees (and $189 shotguns) blow their precious creations out of the sky for sport. [Read more...]

White House Petition Update: Houston…We Need a Faster Ship UPDATED

See that awesome rocket plane above? Twenty-two short hours ago, that was our new ticket to the top of the pyramid. We had moved from the Blackbird to the X-15. But it turns out that the X-15 was just another step in the climb, see? She was only good for about 4500 knots indicated airspeed. [Read more...]

If You Sign the Petition on the HHS Mandate…

Skinner and the Smoking Man will haul you in for questioning. Be afraid. Be very afraid. They will send black helicopters to abduct you. The IRS will audit you. Also, the Men in Black will visit you with that little doohickey that erases your memory. [Read more...]

A Long Time Ago, In a Galaxy Far, Far, Away…

Brought into the present. Is this what it would take for you to consider voting for Obi-wan? You know, Uncle Owen said he’s crazy too, but he never thought much about the Empire, or politics until…it was too late.

HT Darren Burrows, aka Ed Chigliak


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