Jabster,

It's ok, I get a little worked up about it and build expectations, and my main fear didn't happen which is that the show will look like they half-assed for about a week. This was obviously a very intricate and well-planned show even if some of it was more literal for my taste. It seems like if NBC cuts chunks out of some other Opening Ceremonies, it's more of a series of big broad production numbers that don't look so odd or confusing when minutes are missing out of it. In the BBC video I noticed more things (always on a rewatching anyway) like the awesome LEDs and felt more like what it was to be there, where on NBC I felt like they tried to make it more like being in it which is too close and sometimes you see more roughness than you want.

Also, I noticed right away after the Closing Ceremonies (which I don't have too much of an emotional stake in how they turn out, but watched and thought it was really great), there were remarks about the Illuminati when the Phoenix came over the torch in semi-open still-lit position. So, sort of full circle?

Until RIO!!!!!

Kodie,

Glad you enjoyed it more and just to say sorry for my somewhat harsh words ... was feeling a bit pissed off and you caught the bad side of it. That's not an excuse it's merely an explanation. What I said was wrong and .. well sorry for that.

Got a chance to watch the BBC version and I liked it a lot better:
http://bryanpinkall.blogspot.com/2012/07/2012-summer-olympic-opening-ceremony.html

I watched all 4 hours. Some of it made more sense with different commentators who knew when not to talk and no commercial breaks, a lot more cohesive. In the US version, it was as if they were broadcasting live - the commercials took actual time out of the program instead of pausing on the tape, so to speak. Made a huge difference. My least favorite part originally, the house party or "Frankie and June say...thanks Tim!" was now my most favorite part. All the parade of nations, the hosts were more informative and respectful. It was surreal to watch it again as it seemed so long ago, but it was 2 weeks.

I am loving the shit out of the Closing Ceremonies. I was promised NBC had caved to play it live but I got wrestling, rhythmic gymnastics, and men's volleyball - and yet even more water polo - all afternoon, with the program starting at 8. It's a fun party and very entertaining, dynamic and with a loose but organized look with a spontaneous feel, as it should be. So, that's about all, I know you're all thrilled!

These might explain my disappointment:

http://deadspin.com/5930521/nbc-we-are-giving-you-an-awesome-olympics-and-we-dont-care-if-you-dont-like-it

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/tv/showtracker/la-et-st-olympics-nbc-defends-blackout-20120727,0,6531230.story

Basically, NBC edits the show they want for the lowest common denominator, and treats Olympics like only Americans are competing.

Generally speaking, I'm embarrassed to be an American, as proud as I also am to be one. Our major news networks want to be popular and not too cerebral for the lumpy-butts whose asses are married to their sofa cushions (is that biblical?). If they show anyone other than Americans, people will get confused and turn the channel. If they don't talk over what's happening in small words, people will get confused and turn the channel. They don't seem to worry about showing too many commercials, though. So, next time y'all want to cut on us Americans for being dummies about everything, it's because the bar is set really low by our media. That's not the only reason, but it's a big reason. I will give the Opening Ceremonies another try once I can get a video that's not American to watch. I heard they were awesome. What I saw was terrible, but it was made to look that way by people whose assumption was that nobody is intelligent enough to understand it, which is ironic, since it was nearly incomprehensible all cut up and talked on the way they sent it out.

(At least 4 years ago, I could watch many events online if they weren't on my local broadcast channel, so this time around is pathetic - they are making it so you have to subscribe to cable or satellite if you want to see it on the internet, and still only focusing on Americans and losing the drama of competing with others from around the world.)

... and

So.

Brevity is the soul of wit, I thought ...

WTF - was that a reply or just the ramblings of someone you met in the street?

Is that your British sense of humor or a stick up your butt?

Here is a link in case anyone is interested in all the OCs:

http://www.olympicceremony.org/#!CEREMONIES/cod0

Interesting to find out the evolution of the tradition - Moscow 1980 is credited as being the first Mega-Ceremony. I liked looking at historical footage of the earlier ones. Many recent ones have full videos to watch. Or just ignore this thread.

Also @Jabster - are we sure yet this wasn't a simulated alien invasion and installation of a NWO?

WTF - was that a reply or just the ramblings of someone you met in the street?

Maybe it's the difference in pacing. Athens did a 45 minute show that was great, Greek, and well-done. Sorry about the London one, I try and fault the NBC broadcast for aiding in the lack of appeal by butchering what was seen and focusing on the wrong parts, but it was crammed full, too literal, I guess you guys like that. Brevity is the soul of wit, I thought; Keep It Simple, Stupid; would have been funnier if it was just an episode of Fawlty Towers or The Young Ones or even what's that one my mom likes, Keeping Up Appearances. Seems the people who like it most enjoy the political agenda, which I guess is what makes it punk? I'd be embarrassed if America did a show for the world about them stupid Tea Party fatsos in their motorized wheelchairs. Leave that for the "roast" portion of the Correspondents Dinner or Jon Stewart or someone's blog.

I guess what's important to me and I like is the laying aside of differences. I can be idealistic, but I prefer it as an apolitical celebration, not a captive audience to politicize, and not just politicize but hammer the point over a drastically incoherent what hour and a half, 2 hours? Atkinson - non sequitur, giant baby - tragic. British pride? I'm not sensing it. Welcoming atmosphere? I saw a comment that said it was like a rich guy hosting a beauty pageant for the purpose of awarding his daughter. British reaction? - "Nobody understands us." Sounds kinda emo! Venn Diagram of Emo and Sportsmanship:

O O

"How to do 10 minutes of the best thing anyone ever saw and at the edge of their seat for more and more and more:"

Anyone - I presume you mean you there?

Nope, still can't find it in the link you posted ... can you point to where that 10 mins is?

"It was weird and spectacular in all the wrong ways and I kept waiting for the awe - this has to be leading to a "pow" moment or two, but no."

Yeh maybe get Peter Berg to do the next one and then you'll see the awe .. shame about the content but it'll be awesome and cost a hell of a lot.

Others awesome ideas are from Frankie Boyle - write fuck off Germany on the moon or my own favourite just burn 100 million pounds in a field.

Which one do you think would be most awesome?

@Noelle - I am watching Athens OC right now. In Greek, very little commentary but Greek subtitles I have little idea what they say (I can read Greek letters, but not the language), but I still know what's going on. Just taking a break after an hour to catch my breath! For another thing, I realized that I never saw the Barcelona OC, strange that I would forget to, but before I had internet to catch me up. I will watch that one next. The Los Angeles OC in 1984 is the first thing my family recorded when we got a VCR, so I keep that in mind for a re-visit. Maybe next week, if it still exists, I could actually watch the tape as I'll be at my parents'.

How to do 10 minutes of the best thing anyone ever saw and at the edge of their seat for more and more and more:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6fU95w_zFs&feature=related

This was a good (delayed)live-blogged overview of the highlights, funny gifs and remarks, makes me happier:
http://www.sbnation.com/london-olympics-2012/2012/7/27/3193641/london-olympics-2012-opening-ceremony-time-tv-coverage-nbc

Some people also noticed in the introductory film of the travel down the Thames, the montage of past Olympics posters, L.A. (1984) and Atlanta (1996) were OMITTED! Just plain skipped over, not acknowledged. I know everyone hates America, but that's just not classy - they also omitted Berlin (1936). http://www.sbnation.com/london-olympics-2012/2012/7/28/3198920/2012-london-olympics-opening-ceremony-atlanta-los-angeles

I only count 22 posters, I thought this was the 30th. 3 were canceled but numbered, and found Paris (1900) poster was also omitted. I can't fathom this. St. Louis (1904) and Los Angeles (1932) were included. Did they meet their American quota for the piece or what? Why leave off 4 in a 14 second montage.

Trivial detail:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Photomontage#History

Many of the early examples of fine-art photomontage consist of photographed elements superimposed on watercolours, a combination returned to by (e.g.) George Grosz in about 1915. He was part of the Dada movement in Berlin which was instrumental in making montage into a modern art-form.

Ok, I know I'm sick. I wasn't kidding when I said my anxiety about the OC might harm my health or kill me. So, done and looking forward.
---V and backwards.

How could Rio not be awesome? I loved Sydney's. That's some professional OC right there.

NBC is a pain in the ass with coverage even when it's held in this country. They take popular stuff like women's gymnastics and spread it out forever so you have to stay up to midnight if you want to watch it.

I just found it on the deadspin site and watched it right before you posted the link. I think artistically, it is ok, and shouldn't have been taken out, but I don't know what to make of the interpretive dancing. Was it respectful or just demanded to come up with something there. I mean, on the whole, I don't have any problem with most of the elements as themes, just how they were executed. I've also read that it was more coherent on BBC than the US broadcast on NBC. I think the difference that is missing for the whole thing is panoramic awe from a spectator's point of view. A lot of the stories were acted out in close-up or pre-recorded, as if it were a long music video that emptied out the junk drawer of ideas. What makes a spectacle in this type of venue is looking on the whole thing as if you are really there and still understanding what it's about, and I got the idea that it didn't make as much sense if you were actually there, but maybe they got something cool to look at that I didn't get to see either. That's what I look for, that's why I enjoy opening ceremonies. I just don't feel pumped to watch any games after that, with or without the tribute.

After I found out where that would go, I didn't understand the interview with Michael Phelps at all, so it sucks that they didn't just skip over it in the recorded airing, but filled it with something, so... America sucks, I'm not saying we don't. Even after that, if I am remembering, they cut to our local NBC correspondent and the adorable fascinator someone made for her (an expatriate from Natick). She talked about that hat for something like 10 minutes.

I'm even a little nervous already if Chicago goes in 2020, shudder to think what they may come up with. And I'm also thinking the after-effect of this was as I have read, London came after a strong series of opening ceremonies and rather than trying to outdo Beijing in the same predictable vein, did something completely unexpected (one thing a lot of people liked about it particularly). My fear is the future shows may have less daring and personality and just put on the show everybody wants and likes. Takes out the charm and spunk.

Yes, I think about this a lot. I don't watch a lot of other stuff, I certainly don't look forward to, say, the Oscars, and see what everyone's wearing, I don't know where I got Olympic Fever, but it's probably my number one have-to-watch televised event. I also forget about Winter Olympics, I used to watch but never got as excited or critical, actually. Nagano played some music that's probably supposed to be unique and special but it hurt my ears and I turned the channel and never cared again after that.

I was thinking about the tribute to competition missing, but maybe it was done in a video, which I say is cheating. I also would have put the flying dove bikes first instead of at the end, although doves usually go right before the climactic lighting of the flame. I feel like the tribute might have gone earlier, but the arena was set with grass, so they had to start with the grass thing and then spend a long time moving it. This is what I mean when it was too close to watch, because the camera is right down in there with 'em in their face, so all it looked to me like watching people move stuff for 20 minutes or so transitioning to the Industrial Revolution. I would have kept all the parts, just made that happen a lot more spunk and spirit and large-scale drama. The Sydney OC did a whole coherent progression ending in industrialization, and there was a lot more dancing and no literal smokestacks and pretend forging, for the actors who were lucky enough to be assigned something other than roll up the sod and carry it over there. It's almost like London had to do the house party because they realized up to that point, not a lot of dancing or party atmosphere. Awkward. A strange literal story again at close up range and with lots of pre-recorded parts instead of making it work in one piece. Can use the Jumbotron a lot less and make the show mostly inside the stadium.

Well, it's past, I didn't die, and I think Rio will be awesome, plus in the same time zone, and NBC by then won't be such assholes about online streaming only if you already have cable anyway.

Here, I'll get some copypasta for ya. I was on my phone with the last post and it's near impossible to link things from there.

Here's an article: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2180179/NBC-Olympic-coverage-Bob-Costas-joins-outrage-7-7-terrorist-attacks-tribute-edited-Opening-Ceremony.html

Something with a video: http://deadspin.com/5929778/heres-the-opening-ceremony-tribute-to-terrorism-victims-nbc-doesnt-want-you-to-see

edit: I remember while watching last night that it seemed to be missing an ending. There was a celebration of 40 years of British music (really? that's all you have to offer the world?), commercial, long interview with that swimmer guy, and then the alphabet parade of nations. The missing sombre tribute would've been a nice touch. Swimming takes for friggin' ever (how many different events do you need?) and they can interview Phelps some other time.

I'm actually having trouble finding a clip of that. I think the whole thing was a little too literal and hard to "read" from a seat in the house, some due to pre-recorded or super-imposed editing only seen on TV, and just a lot of people rolling up sod and getting it out of the way and nobody looked happy to be English; it wasn't a "Welcome Here, the next two weeks are going to be awesome" show, it was very British in the way that opening ceremonies portray local themes, just not "host-y". I've never seen anything like it. Lacked joy and excitement, missed any tribute to the unified tradition and glory of sport itself (unless NBC cut that too?). I don't hate the history or political aspect, it was just too literal and chaotically full.

The American broadcast cut out the tribute to the victims of the 7/7 terrorist attacks. You can watch it on various Internet sites and YouTube. Simple, beautiful, and sad. I love that hymn.

The Olympics are our every other year reminder on why we hate NBC.

I can't believe I'm still alive. It wasn't cheap and it was well organized for what it was, no crap like the security embarrassment foreshadowed. It was weird and spectacular in all the wrong ways and I kept waiting for the awe - this has to be leading to a "pow" moment or two, but no. Got better at the end. I like the torch. Basically all the volunteers they rehearsed to move sets in costume and that's not a show, is it? I didn't really understand the tribute to social media, it was the most embarrassing part. Hey, let's put on a play about how teenagers can't stop looking at their phones.

But I didn't die, so that's cool.

90% of the jokes I know lose any kind of humor when translated :(

Anyway:

Higgs boson enters in a church, and the priest says:

"We do not allow your kind here"

So the Higgs answers:

"But without me you cannot have mass!"

Stay strong Kodie!

What do you do with a dog with no legs?

Take it for a drag.

HOLY CRAP IT'S TODAY!

I'm so nervous!

My dog has no nose.

Q: What do you call a fly with no wings?
A: A walk

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb
A: Giraffe

*tumble weed*

Two Irish men walk into a bar. The Englishman ducked.

What do you call a Brazilian man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

A good old Tommy Cooper joke ...

"I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

“He said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library. I thought, "That's a turn-up for the books."”

I may never laugh again. F*** you sir.

A horse walks into a pub and the barman says ... why the long face?