I had a new vision of hell today:
A computer you are eternally seated at, but can only access one site: John C's heavenly ramblings.
A New Vision of Hell
(23 posts) (14 voices)-
Daniel Florien
AdministratorPosted 3 years ago # -
CompGuy
MemberMy vision--or nightmare--of hell has always been an endless road trip across the Midwest, as the passenger, with only CD in the car: the soundtrack of Fiddler on the Roof.
Either that or an eternity of grading freshman-comp essays. And now I must retire to the home office for a little foretaste of that particular hell.
Posted 3 years ago # -
My personal hell?
I'm locked in a room where all the TVs are tuned into Fox News, but somehow switch to Larry Kudlow instead of Shepherd Smith.
Posted 3 years ago # -
phrankygee
Member@Tele: Shep Smith has been doing some pretty good work lately. I say CNN needs to trade him back for Glenn Beck. I don't know sports team draft terminology, but if I did I would have used it in the preceding sentence to hopefully comedic effect.
My hell... Well, I've lived a little of it the past 2 weeks. My car was totaled on Monday, My father-in-law came to stay with us for 6 days, during which he told us about his possible breast cancer diagnosis, I've had a terrible sinus infection, and it has been cloudy/rainy/foggy for so long that I've forgotten what stars look like.
But if I had John C trying to cheer me up with his special brand of wisdom, that would be even worse.
Posted 3 years ago # -
Jeez Frank, breast cancer (even in men) is serious shit. I hope he turns out okay.
My hell would probably involve some combination of the annoying Christian tv shows with which I grew up, most notably but not limited to Veggietales, Adventures in Oddysey, and McGee & Me.
Posted 3 years ago # -
GeekGirl
MemberHey Phranky, I'll pray for you (lol! Couldn't resist,sorry)
Seriously though, watch the sinus infections, I know people who've ended up hospitalized. Hope you feel better soon!I lived through Hell all ready. Drove back to St. Louis from California with a broken CD player. The choices were country, gospel, or NASCAR the entire 36 hours back. Lesson learned: NEVER travel without an mp3 player.
Posted 3 years ago # -
Phranky: That's why it's hell. The only good person is turned off.
Posted 3 years ago # -
phrankygee
MemberYeah, tele, I got it, I was just concurring.
Thanks everyone, for the well-wishes and, ahem... prayers.
Update: I still don't know about dad-in-law, and the weather has managed to turn from shitty to even shittier*, but the doc gave me some kickass codeine cough syrup and some amoxicillin, so that should be getting all better. When/if I get reimbursed for my insurance deductible, I should come out around $350 ahead of what I owe on the car, so that's all good, too.
*it sucks doing balloon animals in the rain when it's 47 degrees out. Not surprisingly, there's not been much of a line of customers.
The weather's actually been so bad, I keep expecting to see sparkly vampires sulking around.
Posted 3 years ago # -
Jabster
Member@phrankgee
"*it sucks doing balloon animals in the rain when it's 47 degrees out."
Have you thought about diversifying in to balloon umbrellas or rain coats?
p.s. I would like to say sorry for you many troubles at the moment but being English means I believe in "stiff upper-lip" and all that. We don't do anything resembling emotions, it's just not the done thing :-)
Posted 3 years ago # -
GeekGirl
Member"The weather's actually been so bad, I keep expecting to see sparkly vampires sulking around."
It has been rather Seattle-like, that was until yesterday. But they're telling us that we are going back to it tomorrow for the rest of the week.
Almost forgot what the sun looked like for a minute ;)Posted 3 years ago # -
GeekGirl
MemberYes, the STL has been all gloom and doom for over week with the weather. (and the insane amount of shootings...wtf?) But I now have an addition to hell. I will see your sinus infection and raise you tooth pain radiating out through the jaw and swelling up the side of my face.
Dentist can't see me until tomorrow :(
I will be stopping for Walgreen's whatever-over-the-counter I can get between work and school.
Also...Happy Monday all. *insert sarcasm*Posted 3 years ago # -
phrankygee
MemberOooh. Toothache is far worse than sinus infection. Only thing worse than a toothache is an earache. And the only thing even worserer than that is a severe, blistering, itchy, sunburn.
In regard to the OP, that was actually my first "vision of hell". in 6th grade, my shoulders and neck sunburned so bad at my school's Field Day (mandatory sitting on a blanket in direct sunlight for hours, thanks a lot Tennessee School System!) that I had several blisters the size of quarters form. I should have probably gone to the doctor for 2nd degree burns, but that never seemed to have occured to anyone at the time. (including me.)
A couple of days later, the burn itched horribly, and scratching it was of course completely out of the question; my nerve endings were on fire. I complained loudly and pitifully to my mom about it. Lacking any medical training, and wanting to tell me something, she suggested letting water run over it in the shower might alleviate the itching.
I was so excited to have potential relief from my torment that I ran to the bathroom and started undressing for the shower as fast as I possibly could. Unfortunately, I was going so fast, I forgot to take my shoes off before trying to take my pants off, and quickly found myself completely unable to extract my feet from the straitjacket-like grip that my shoes and pants now had on me. I had put myself in Chinese footcuffs.
Unable to get undressed or re-dressed, with the nerves in my neck and shoulders feeling like a thousand lit sparklers, I just absolutely broke down. I sat on the toilet-seat lid and sobbed and sobbed. My mom finally came and helped extract me from my shoes and pants, and I was able to run cold water over my back, which didn't really help much, actually.
Later, my little 6th grade self heard something about the eternal torment of hell, which of course I had heard before, and suddenly had a point of reference for what that would actually be like. For as long as I believed in hell, that was my understanding of it. Gnashing of teeth, indeed.
Fortunately, hell doesn't exist, and every pain on earth comes to an end, either through healing, or the comfortable release of death. Headaches, sunburns, sinus infections and even toothaches will all pass in time. Hooray for reality!
Posted 3 years ago #
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