{"id":1854,"date":"2013-08-22T03:01:50","date_gmt":"2013-08-22T09:01:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/afewgrownmen\/?p=1854"},"modified":"2013-08-21T17:09:02","modified_gmt":"2013-08-21T23:09:02","slug":"parenting-no-rules","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/afewgrownmen\/2013\/08\/parenting-no-rules\/","title":{"rendered":"Six Months of No Rules"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

The last 6 months I\u2019ve been conducting a little experiment; but, instead of using rats\u2026 I used my daughter<\/em>.<\/p>\n

No, I didn\u2019t cage her, send her through a maze and reward her with pellets. I did something a little more drastic in most conservative parenting circles: I freed her from all rules and restrictions at age 17\u00bd.<\/p>\n

Some of our friends thought we were nuts, and at times\u2026 we wondered. But we refrained from retightening our grip.<\/p>\n

This week my daughter turned 18, and I\u2019m absolutely fascinated with what I\u2019ve learned in the last year. For the last 6 months she\u2019s had the freedom to hang out with whoever she wants, go where she wants, and stay out as late as she wants (this sounds like a Miley Cyrus song<\/a>).<\/p>\n

The results were amazing!<\/p>\n

Our theory was basically this:<\/p>\n

Start strict, and loosen up as our kids get older, eventually freeing them from all boundaries by age 17\u00bd.<\/em><\/p>\n

We figured, they can do whatever they want when they\u2019re 18 anyway, so why not get there six months early while they\u2019re still under our shadow? I posted about this in detail here<\/a>, and Doug Fields and I now teach it as a parenting workshop<\/a>, based on our workbook<\/a> about setting realistic guardrails for today\u2019s kids who have a smartphone in their pocket.<\/p>\n

Well, now my daughter is 18, so some of what was just \u201ctheory\u201d has been truly tried and tested in my home. So I thought I\u2019d share with you some of our observations over the last few years:<\/p>\n