\u2026 and another thing, Mister President.<\/strong> Just wanted to say congratulations, shake your hand and all that.<\/p>\n\u00a0<\/p>\n
It\u2019s been a long, hard election season, and we voters have done a swell job raising complex questions with no easy answers. Even though we\u2019d like those easy answers to exist.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
So solving all the problems of the world is your job now. Yep \u2026 now that you\u2019re in office we want our presidents to fix, fix, fix.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
Let\u2019s get on with business, alrighty?<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
I wonder if you could do something about the economy. Do it quick. We need jobs, and we need them bad. Higher wages all around would be nice too \u2026 particularly for me.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
And it would be swell if you could end all the wars around the globe. Every war that\u2019s ever happened is the responsibility of the POTUS, so keep our military small and politically correct, while still protecting our domestic and international interests\u2014okay?<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
By the way, Mister President, you need to make sure we\u2019re well respected in the world. Not seen as arrogant, because we don\u2019t want other nations thinking we\u2019re strutting our stuff. But we need to be seen as powerful\u2014really powerful\u2014even to those dictator types like Chavez who only understand power their way. So could you sort that out please, Mister President?<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
And, Mister President, would you put it on your agenda tomorrow to stop global warming? Man, I\u2019m sick of taking vacations in the rain. I want a president who ensures no weird weather from here on out. Your new middle name needs to be Mister Sunny Days President. No crop failures. No hurricanes. No famine or pestilence. Never.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
And another thing, Mister President,<\/strong> would you puh-leez<\/em> fix health care? I hate spending more each month on health care than I do on my mortgage. But for goodness sake, don\u2019t do what the Canadians did. If we\u2019ve got the flu, we want to be able see our doctors more than once in five years. Well, maybe you should kinda do what the Canadians did. You know\u2014make health care ABSOLUTELY FREE and all.<\/p>\n\u00a0<\/p>\n
Could you make sure America stays Middle Class? Keep out the Mexicans is what I\u2019m talking about. And the Pakistanis, they\u2019re starting to worry me. And anyone with the last name Ahmadinejad. But I don\u2019t want to carry a passport when I fly. And I don\u2019t want to be profiled. You\u2019re really starting to press my civil rights, Mister President. So just watch it, okay?<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
This time, don\u2019t have sex with your secretary.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
And don\u2019t record anyone talking about you in the hotel next door. All right, buddy?<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t bow to the Chinese ever again.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
And\u2014good grief\u2014learn how to correctly spell potatoe.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
And another thing, Mister President\u2014don\u2019t spend any more money. Keep those thousand points of light as small as possible. But make sure the roads are fixed, the schools aren\u2019t shuttered, and no child gets left behind.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
Oh, and Mister President \u2026 could you \u2026 for once \u2026 be cool<\/em>? This time, I want my president playing bass guitar. Bass guitar players are always cool.<\/p>\n\u00a0<\/p>\n
Thanks Mister President. It\u2019s gonna be a great next four years.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n
Question: What do you hope the president accomplishes (or not) in the next four years? <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Dateline: day after election, everywhere, USA \u00a0 \u00a0 \u2026 and another thing, Mister President. Just wanted to say congratulations, shake your hand and all that. \u00a0 It\u2019s been a long, hard election season, and we voters have done a swell job raising complex questions with no easy answers. Even though we\u2019d like those easy answers […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1105,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[52,53],"tags":[97,205,99,98],"class_list":["post-853","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-patriotism","category-politics","tag-election","tag-politics","tag-president","tag-vote"],"yoast_head":"\n
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