Yesterday Ana left to return to Spain, and I returned to work, engulfed in sadness. The two weeks she was here were wonderful, magical, and thoroughly joyful. Our travels, our conversations, our spontaneous moments of affection, our quite embraces, and even the normal activities of day to day life all had an air of perfection, of beauty. The sadness of our last hours together slowly crept over me as we packed her bags. The drive to the airport was like... Read more

The road trip is over, I’m back in Missoula, back at work, back at school. I hope to post several of my thoughts from the trip over the next couple weeks, but I’m realizing that I’m going to be extremely busy – so we’ll see. I have 2 25pg and one 12pg paper to write by May 12, one test, and a conference May 5th & 6th to prepare for. One of the things that came to mind often during... Read more

“Vegas Baby, Vegas” -Trent and Mikey, Swingers I’m in Vegas now with Ana on day two of our little roadtrip (Vegas, L.A., and up the CA coast). It has been very lovely, but definitly too much driving. Tonight we’re visiting Adam, an old classmate of my sister and hunting-partner of my father, in Vegas. He’ll take us out and show us the town 🙂 (I’ve already lost a dollar gambling, my greatest losses thus far in life!) We saw the... Read more

Beyond the wonderful Ashes and Snow I experienced tonight, I also wandered through some videos on the FPMT (Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition) website. (Many thanks to the Buddhism in Huston blog for the link, and Blogmandu for the link to that!) Two quotes from the FPMT that I have long held close to my heart are: World Peace through Inner PeaceInner Peace through Helping Others And Dwelling deap within our heart,and within the heart of all... Read more

“My heart is like an old house whose windows have not been opened for years.” A temporary museum housing more than 100 large-scale photographic works and three accompanying 35mm films by artist Gregory Colbert opened January 14, 2006, transforming an area adjacent to Santa Monica’s historic pier into a timeless realm in which animals co-exist with humans. My sister told me about this beautiful art exhibition soon after it opened and she first saw it. She’s seen it again three... Read more

Today John Dunleavy, organizer of the Manhattan’s St. Patrick’s Day parade kindly compared Gays and Lesbians with Nazis and the Ku Klux Klan. This is his reasoning for excluding the Irish Lesbian and Gay Organization (ILGO) from joining their fellow countrymen in the yearly parade. In a lovely article from four years ago, it mentions that the mayor joined the ILGO in their inaugural march along the parade route. Mostly jeered by onlookers, the mayor was even nearly hit in... Read more

My dad turns 57 today. Those coming from good Catholic families will not be surprised that he is named Patrick (tomorrow is, as even the Godless heathens know, St. Patrick’s Day). Here is an old picture (very old) with me at about the age of 6. Dad trained me as a pool shark early in life. And though I’ve taken up a way of life quite far removed from anything he could have imagined, I am very lucky and appreciative... Read more

Well, the Sartre test is over (I did ok), and I’ve recently received some good calls to action that I thought I would pass on. Sometimes even philosophy-types like me have to get out of our heads and actually do something from time to time. Stop Canada’s Seal Hunt! Canada plans to sanction the hunting of baby seals. Clubbing baby seals = bad karma. So go sign the pledge, write a letter, or whatever else you can do to stop... Read more

(beginning here) On my retreat I also did some work on a little moral dilemma I’ve been caught in lately. It has to do, speaking generally, with being caught between being a young man (fun-loving, a bit rebellious, care free, etc) and being an adult (respecting others, accepting responsibilities). I am finding myself less and less justifying my actions with ‘who cares?‘ and much less so with ‘who’s gonna find out, anyhow?‘, two key phrases of youth. I was reminded... Read more

(beginning here) One doesn’t go on retreat trying to ‘work out’ emotional/personal/intellectual issues or problems. Yet you always have these problems, and oddly enough they tend to come up during retreats, especially in meditation (when you’re supposed to be practicing open awareness). And, if you’re lucky, somewhere along the way a solution or answer comes to you. Some interesting words from the scriptures: (with implications on a recent post on self) “Supreme mind, — in words, — can never be... Read more