AAR<\/span><\/p>\n I am very, very happy that not only do I get to present a paper at this major conference, but also that I will be joining an amazing group of people, all talking about studies in comparative meditation. They include UM\u2019s own Brad Clough, the excellent new professor of Asian relgions, Father Francis Tiso<\/a>, a well-known Catholic contemplative who did his Ph.D. on Milarepa and the Tibetan \u201cRainbow Body\u201d stories, and several other top-notch scholars. I certainly have my work cut out for me in the next 5 months. I\u2019m looking forward to it.<\/p>\n Mountain Hiking and Wildflowers<\/span><\/p>\n In 2007 I took daily, or at least regular, hikes up Missoula\u2019s Mount Sentinel for the often stunning sunsets, beautiful wildflowers, and wildlife. Last night, after an early evening jog in the sun, I decided to head up the mountain.<\/p>\n This time of year the mountain looks pretty dead, still dormant from the winter and in fact still covered in snow at the top. But just 50 or so feet up the trail I encountered this little guy:<\/p>\n Here\u2019s a shot looking north over Missoula\u2019s north hills and at the top of Snowbowl ski area: Last summer and fall I spent a good deal of time \u2013 too much, to be honest \u2013 looking into Borderline Personality Disorder. A \u2018friend\u2019 of mine had (has) the disorder I believe, and the chaos of her life kind of took over mine for a while. Digging myself out of that chaos, I was very curious about just <\/span>how <\/span>that all could have happened \u2013 to me and to her<\/span>.<\/p>\n Last night I finished \u201cThe Siren\u2019s Dance, My Marriage to a Borderline: A Case Study<\/a>.\u201d It\u2019s a very good book, and as one amazon reviewer said, it\u2019s the kind of book we (people who have had borderlines in our life) will want to give to our friends and family and say, \u201csee \u2013 this is how it happens.\u201d<\/p>\n It tells the story of Anthony, a medical student who comes across a young woman who has attempted suicide after a break-up. \u201cSomething\u201d about her intrigues him \u2013 he\u2019s never quite able to say exactly what. Her beauty, charm, spontaneity, her child-like need for total love and affection all run together to hook him. He talks with her, finds out she\u2019s had a rough life and tough breaks and he figures that if she just had some stability in her life, she could be amazing.<\/span> Not long after her discharge from the hospital, Anthony gets a call from the girl\u2019s mother thanking him and inviting him to a party. He knows it\u2019s a bit odd and perhaps stepping over the patient-doctor line in terms of ethics \u2013 but he goes. (and it\u2019s all downhill from there)<\/p>\n Readers unfamiliar with borderline pathology and the typical development of relationships with borderlines might be a bit frustrated with Anthony. He <\/span>had to know<\/span> something wasn\u2019t right about her \u2013 right?<\/span> (a question a friend of mine recently asked me in regard to my former friend) \u201cWell\u2026 Yes\u2026 Of course\u2026 But\u2026\u201d goes the answer. The book gives a good view into the life of a person living with a borderline: the treadmill of ever-changing expectations, the hurdles of random demands and confrontations, the roller-coaster of emotional highs and lows, and the mine-field of potential outbursts and breakdowns. It also gives a <\/span>hint<\/span> at what it must be like to suffer from the illness, the lack of control over one\u2019s own emotions, the frantic efforts to maintain calm or control, and so on<\/span>. But I think there are better books for that side of things. <\/p>\n To view it from the outside it\u2019s easy to say, \u201cwhy the heck would you allow yourself to go through all of that?\u201d But <\/span>inside<\/span> the story it\u2019s even more perplexing.<\/span> Read the book, try to put yourself in Anthony\u2019s shoes and I think you might see how you\u2019d make many of the same mistakes. I found myself jotting down the word \u201cna\u00efvet\u00e9\u201d in the margins over and over again<\/span>, but also reflecting back on my own na\u00efvet\u00e9.<\/p>\n Such is life. In the end Anthony looks back, noting how the relationship made him more empathic to people with the illness and ultimately made him a better doctor (a psychiatrist no less). For my part it has made me reflect deeply on Buddhist<\/a> psychology and what meditation and Buddhist philosophy<\/a> might have to offer to borderlines and people in their lives<\/span>. I can\u2019t say that I\u2019ve come to any grand conclusions as of yet, but I do think it is something I\u2019ll return to again at some point. Another, more broadly reaching book that I am reading is \u201cEvil Genes: Why Rome Fell, Hitler Rose, Enron Failed, and My Sister Stole My Mother\u2019s Boyfriend<\/a>.\u201d I\u2019d love to write more about that but duty calls (thesis work, a paper on meditation I have to deliver in a week, and more). See the first review on amazon for an excellent summary.<\/p>\n So much going on \u2013 as usual. Let\u2019s see\u2026. This week I found out that my proposal was accepted for the American Academy of Religion, AAR, conference (next November in Montreal)! I made my first hike of the year up Mount Sentinel for the sunset last night, along the way discovering the first -to me […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":118,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-364","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_fyeYpxfdjuI\/SdZfTPZw0KI\/AAAAAAAAAZs\/Ar3TzjJ_MqQ\/s320\/IMG_1766.JPG\")
<\/a>I\u2019m pretty sure that\u2019s a Buttercup. After spotting this one I noticed tiny dots of yellow and green here and there along the otherwise brown-gray hillside. Realizing that the mountain is waking up made me smile. Before long there will be Arrowleaf Balsamroot, Sage, Mock-Orange, Indian Paintbrush, and much more.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_fyeYpxfdjuI\/SdZioPwjieI\/AAAAAAAAAZ0\/HtKDsunwiWo\/s320\/IMG_1813.JPG\")
<\/a>
And Borderline PD<\/span><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/blogger.googleusercontent.com\/tracker\/7907151-2167841757936021242?l=americanbuddhist.blogspot.com\")