{"id":651207,"date":"2013-09-02T21:02:58","date_gmt":"2013-09-02T21:02:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/andygill\/?p=651207"},"modified":"2013-09-02T21:02:58","modified_gmt":"2013-09-02T21:02:58","slug":"not-enough","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/andygill\/not-enough\/","title":{"rendered":"Not Enough"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

It\u2019s taken me a while in life to come to realize that I can choose my friends.<\/p>\n

I can choose who I let in, and who I don\u2019t let in. I may not be able to choose how people talk to me, but I can choose how much or how often certain people talk to me.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s crazy, how much time I\u2019ve spent with people who have treated me poorly, who have lacked respect for me, and who could careless about anyone else but themselves.<\/p>\n

Though I honestly don\u2019t think that they were the biggest problem then, I think the biggest problem was discovered when I asked the question,<\/p>\n

Why do I allow these people to be in my life?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I think the answer to that is:<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t feel as if I deserved anything better.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t feel that I deserved anything at all really.<\/p>\n

I mean that\u2019s what many have been taught, from Sunday school all the way up to now, that we\u2019re depraved, meaning we\u2019re worthless, and because we\u2019re worthless, we deserve punishment and death, and we\u2019re lucky to even have what we have now.<\/p>\n

The church isn\u2019t even the leader in this, so if you didn\u2019t grow up in church, you still have been told your entire life, by media, commercials, advertisements, and television shows that you\u2019re not enough, and because you\u2019re not enough you need to buy, watch, read, or download this or that so you then can be enough\u2026<\/p>\n

\u2026 That is, until they have something new to sell you next week.<\/p>\n

\u201cTo be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear<\/a>. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything. It liberates us from pretense, humbles us out of our self-righteousness, and fortifies us for any difficulty life can throw at us.\u201d \u2013 Tim Keller<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

So we allow abuse. We put up with harassment. We subject ourselves to control and manipulation\u2026\u00a0We allow people to laugh at our dreams,\u00a0to speak poorly and discouragingly to us, and\u00a0to make \u201cjokes\u201d that we pretend to laugh and smile at.<\/p>\n

Eventually the danger is that we then become what we hate. We begin to guard and protect ourselves. We begin to become and act as if we\u2019re someone we\u2019re not, in hope that the people we don\u2019t even like, will then like \u201cus.\u201d<\/p>\n

Simply put \u2013 We buy into the lie, and therefore live a lie.\u00a0<\/b>Convincing others to like the person we\u2019re pretending to be. Forgetting who we truly are. Losing touch with reality, and our true inner selves.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately it took me until my twenties to get this. But it\u2019s simple, like Donald Miller says so well:<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you want to be loved, be yourself with people who are kind and trustworthy.\u201d \u2013 Donald Miller<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It\u2019s crazy how tough it is to be yourself. It\u2019s even crazier, in my opinion, how tough it is to find many others who will love you and accept you, for you; and yet rebuke, encourage, and correct you with gentleness and humility\u2026<\/p>\n

It\u2019s odd how when we\u2019re then surrounded by loving, humble, respectful people we become ourselves, loving, humble, respectful people\u2026 I think this is similar to handing over the entirety of your life to Christ. Maybe this is what Jesus meant when he said, \u201cYou will recognize them by their fruit.\u201d When we live a life that has been put in the hands of God, walk in a body filled with the Holy Spirit, and take on a mind dedicated to Christ we bear fruit, the kind that is good\u2026<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s taken me a while in life to come to realize that I can choose my friends. I can choose who I let in, and who I don\u2019t let in. I may not be able to choose how people talk to me, but I can choose how much or how often certain people talk to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2493,"featured_media":652473,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,14],"tags":[25,147,148,149,150],"class_list":["post-651207","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-christian","category-life","tag-andy-gill","tag-donald-miller","tag-not-enough","tag-self-respect","tag-tim-keller"],"yoast_head":"\nNot Enough<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It's taken me a while in life to come to realize that I can choose my friends. I can choose who I let in, and who I don't let in. 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