{"id":969,"date":"2015-08-24T11:19:30","date_gmt":"2015-08-24T15:19:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/askshaunti\/?p=969"},"modified":"2015-08-25T13:29:52","modified_gmt":"2015-08-25T17:29:52","slug":"why-is-it-that-men-always-seem-to-be-the-ones-who-look-at-porn-and-cheat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/askshaunti\/2015\/08\/why-is-it-that-men-always-seem-to-be-the-ones-who-look-at-porn-and-cheat\/","title":{"rendered":"Why is it that MEN always seem to be the ones who look at porn and cheat?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"Man<\/a>Dear Shaunti,<\/strong><\/p>\n

Why is it always men who look at porn, hide things, and cheat? \u00a0I\u2019m a single woman, and I can\u2019t help but notice that in the news last week, the one thing Josh Duggar and most of the Ashley Madison cheaters have in common is that they are all men. <\/i>\u00a0\u00a0Supposedly, even the few women on the hacked Ashley Madison site were fake profiles, just to reel in all those men out there who want to cheat. \u00a0It is crazy. \u00a0It makes me think women are just inherently more trustworthy. \u00a0Part of me still wants to meet someone, but how can I ever trust any guy again?<\/strong><\/p>\n

-Single and Cynical<\/strong>
\nDear Single,<\/p>\n

First of all, it is not <\/i>always men who look at porn, hide things and cheat. \u00a0Women do too. \u00a0We don\u2019t have some inherent saintliness in us that makes us better people.<\/p>\n

But the pattern you\u2019re noticing about more-men-than-women is very real, and it exposes something really important to understand about the differences between us. It\u2019s just that your bottom line conclusion is wrong: the differences aren\u2019t <\/i>about one gender being inherently less trustworthy, but about the very different challenges that come from living in today\u2019s culture. \u00a0And it is so ironic that the main reason I see this so clearly is that I released a book about these challenges, Through A Man\u2019s Eyes<\/em><\/a>,<\/i> just a few weeks ago.<\/p>\n

This is obviously an oversimplification but here are three reasons why this pattern of porn use and cheating seems to happen far more with men than with women:<\/p>\n