My husband, Adam, and I are raising our kids in a Pagan household. I don\u2019t say that we are raising the kids as Pagans<\/em>, or to be Pagans, but Adam and I run our house in a certain way, practice in a certain way, and celebrate in a certain way \u2013 a rather hodge podge, but decidedly Pagan way. The kids see us and hear us, and kids absorb what surrounds them.<\/p>\n Many Pagans were raised Christian and have issues with the indoctrination of their upbringing. Adam was raised Christian and it\u2019s certainly had a detrimental impact on his life. I was raised secular, with no religion of any sort, really. My kids get the best of all worlds, I think. They get the knowledge and respect of world religions (thanks to having a religions studies scholar for a mother); they get the flexibility and \u2018hands off\u2019 attitude that worked for me; they get the guidance that their parents can provide and can witness in their parents\u2019 practices; they get some semblance of tradition that they can either hang on to or choose to reject as they grow older.<\/p>\n Adam and I have no faith to pass down. It\u2019s not about faith. <\/em>We are passing along tools, values, and lore (as it is appropriate, and much of Feri lore is not at this point). Does this mean that we talk about the gods as archetypes or myths? No. As P Sufenas Virius Lupus<\/a> suggests, if the gods are good enough for the grown ups, surely they are good enough for the kids? I agree. The kids see that mama and papa honor Ganesh (we have statues in nearly every room!). The kids know of several of mama\u2019s gods and several of papa\u2019s. They are welcome to honor \u2013 or not \u2013 as they see fit.<\/p>\n Much of what we pass down is based on expediency: does it work? do you experience it? Why worship a deity if you don\u2019t feel like you\u2019ve got a relationship? We talk about this and we talk about how to forge relationship with deity, the Land, or other spirits. If our kids grow up and feel that they\u2019ve experienced nothing of meaning, so be it. Maybe they grow up and Jesus speaks to them, so be it.<\/p>\n Right now, at 5, we\u2019re working on \u2018controlling all our parts.\u2019 This involves a lot of listening: what does your body tell you? What do you need? How are you feeling? What else do you sense? I use the word \u2018control\u2019 here, not because our triple souls need to be controlled, but because my 5-year-old struggles to keep his hands to himself (and every other body part) and keeping his parts in check is part of controlling his hands. We have worked on meditation and deep breathing. It\u2019s something we started with both kids when they were around 18 months, with limited success, but you have to start young! Sometimes my son sits for 90 seconds at a time and practices his meditation. You gotta start somewhere!<\/p>\n We\u2019ve also worked on raising energy while meditating. I\u2019ve walked him through a couple of very short guided meditations. Then we talk about what he experienced. It\u2019s fascinating to hear what he\u2019s experiencing and how he connects that his regular day existence. For example, after one of the first meditations on raising a ball of light in his center, he then asked if he could create a spirit outside himself that would do his bidding. Could I teach him that?? I was floored at that connection, because yes, it is possible! However, I\u2019ve never done that, and he needs to master sitting still first.<\/p>\n The kids see their parents sitting regularly, sometimes chanting, sometimes giving offerings, lighting candles and incense, and sometimes creating spells or reading tarot. Occasionally I\u2019ll let one or both of the kids watch \u2013 sometimes because I\u2019m doing something very simple that they won\u2019t disrupt and sometimes because if I don\u2019t have them with me I won\u2019t get another chance that day to do my offering or whatnot. I\u2019ve embraced that I may have pujas that are more chaotic than others, and that sometimes there just won\u2019t be meditation, only a bow and an offering.<\/p>\n Adam and I are slowly creating holidays that reflect our deities, our experiences with Place and the Wheel of the Year, and the rhythms of our family. So far, Samhain\/Halloween and Yule\/Christmas are the big holidays of the year. There are other ones, scattered through out the year. Sometimes the kids are really interested and other times they couldn\u2019t be bothered. I think that\u2019s pretty normal, and there is very little pressure for them to be involved. But they see the grown ups doing it.<\/p>\n Can you see the theme here? The kids see what we do and can participate as they desire. There is no coercion, but I won\u2019t say there isn\u2019t any indoctrination. The kids hear what the grown ups talk about, and in our house it is not unusual to hear an hour-long discussion on tarot in a car ride to Seattle, or hear discussions of magic at the dinner table, or how different branches of Buddhism<\/a> have different meditation techniques as we\u2019re getting ready for bed.<\/p>\n These actions reflect our values. We support these values \u2013 of experience, of practice, of finding ways to communicate with others (whether human, spirit or other), of creativity \u2013 by surrounding ourselves with others who share similar values, even if they express them differently. We read and watch things* that encourage these values as well, and we talk about them.<\/p>\n![\"Ganesh,](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/397\/2011\/07\/ganesha2_tm.jpg\")
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