D<\/span>oubt. It\u2019s a lame experience, and creates all sorts of confusion. The standard view of it, as far as I can tell, is that it is a Very Bad Thing, and should be avoided. That it is somehow the anti-faith, faith\u2019s enemy, faith\u2019s destroyer. Like most standard views, I would love \u2013 absolutely love \u2013 to flip it around for you. Doubt requires belief. It is not doubt but skepticism (in the modern sense) that is an enemy to faith, for skepticism is the disdain for a religion held by those outside of the religion. Whereas doubt is the fear of those within a religion. And let me be the first to tell you, if there is no solid fear within your religion, it\u2019s not a religion, it\u2019s a yoga class.<\/p>\n Doubt requires belief. That much is obvious. But in many ways, belief requires doubt. It is precisely the doubt I feel when I\u2019ve looked at the Eucharist that makes my belief valid. It is the fact that the abyss opens up all around me, that the words \u201call lies\u201d are whispered into my ears that makes belief possible. Otherwise I have not belief but a truth force-fed to me. If there were no doubt I would not be free to choose God, rather He would be forced upon me. Indeed, there are days when I ask for God to do\u00a0exactly\u00a0that, for after all, aren\u2019t the doubts too much to bear? Isn\u2019t the notion that this could all be the most brilliant, terrible lie ever conceived, isn\u2019t that too heart-breaking to justify the faith that comes as a result? Couldn\u2019t he just throw Himself at me, whether I liked it or not? The answer is yes, but love is greater than all that. Love freely given is all that will fulfill us, love freely chosen is what will end doubt, not a God who gives us no choice in believing Him. If I know human nature, all a forced belief would lead to is resentment.<\/p>\n
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<\/a>The kind of doubt I often experience, and the most common doubt I\u2019ve heard my friends talk about is actually quite holy. \u201cI don\u2019t want to go to confession because I don\u2019t think I believe it forgives sins\u201d or \u201cHow can I\u00a0receive\u00a0the Eucharist if I doubt that it is truly God?\u201d There is a hidden reverence here, a flower of hope so small and beautiful it might go unnoticed by the doubter. What a great reverence it is to to the Eucharist to avoid it for fear of not believing it. What high esteem the sacrament of reconciliation is held in the words above, that it should not be visited unless fully grasped? Skepticism would say that the thing is a wash and can thus be visited freely. If it is a cracker, eat it. If baptism is just a bath, then have a bath. Only doubt is rooted faith. Only if it is true should there be a reverent avoidance. I immediately think of my favorite piece of fiction by Chesterton, The Ball and the Cross, in which a certain Turnbull explains to a lady he is in love with that he will not\u00a0receive\u00a0the Eucharist because he is an atheist.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/blogger.googleusercontent.com\/tracker\/3060433030054060305-8833263965447253960?l=badcatholicblog.blogspot.com\")
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