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<\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\nB<\/span>eing the hardcore Catholic folk that you are, the phrase \u201cculturally Catholic\u201d might set you snarling. But grant me just a moment to attempt a turn-of-phrase. I maintain that those who \u2013 somewhat sullenly \u2013 call themselves \u201conly\u00a0culturally\u00a0catholic\u201d \u2013 as in \u201cyeah-my-parents- make-me-go-to-church-but-I\u2019m-still-hip-enough-to-think-gay-sex-is-awesome\u201d \u2013 tend to have utterly no idea what Catholic culture is, much less a history of practicing it. There seems to be a flawed train of thought in our day to day language; that being a secular, washed-up version of someone who once attended Catholic school is being culturally Catholic. Because to practice Catholic culture is to practice the Catholic religion, and as it turns out, the more old-school, faithful, and stubbornly grumpy religiosity one has about them, the more of a Catholic culture they are\u00a0embedded\u00a0in. These apathetic and dismal folk should take a dose of honesty and call themselves \u201cgenetically Catholic\u201d or \u201cunfortunately Catholic\u201d or just \u201cnot Catholic\u201d.\u00a0It\u2019s matter of fact that one can only be with us or against us, but if thou art with us \u2013 don\u2019t whine.<\/p>\n This culture, by the way, happens to be a cure to the dreaded disease I call \u201cbeing white\u201d. You see, us white, American, 16-20 something year olds, despite looking great in preppy clothes, are for the large part a people without a home land, and a people without a culture. There really isn\u2019t much to informing the world that you are \u201c1\/4 Irish, 1\/8 German, 1\/8 Dutch, 1\/4 Jew and 1\/4 Polish, dammit!\u201d though it makes wonderful conversation, and gives an excuse to celebrate a wide plethora of obscure holidays. And while there\u2019s American patriotism, a thing I\u2019m more than a little skeptical of, American culture is nothing more than watered down English culture, which is soon to be a little more than watered down EU culture, unless the Anglicans really do convert. Anyhow, call me a pessimist, but there doesn\u2019t seem to be a massive cultural bond created by admitting common Americanhood. Just try it. Next time someone is about to punch you, give it a good old, \u201cHey we\u2019re all American here!\u201d Juxtapose your enemies response with some common Irish blood between you.<\/p>\n