{"id":4773,"date":"2015-01-13T14:23:33","date_gmt":"2015-01-13T19:23:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/barefootandpregnant\/?p=4773"},"modified":"2015-01-14T17:07:42","modified_gmt":"2015-01-14T22:07:42","slug":"why-paris-is-such-an-utter-plonker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/barefootandpregnant\/2015\/01\/why-paris-is-such-an-utter-plonker.html","title":{"rendered":"Why Paris is Such an Utter Plonker – UPDATED"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"paris<\/p>\n

This bit of amazingness is brought to you by Jenks at Greek Myth Comix<\/a>. She* graciously allowed me to repost it here for y\u2019all, but you should definitely, definitely head over to her blog and check out the hilarious commentary that follows the comic. Here\u2019s an excerpt:<\/p>\n

Helen, after being forced to go to Paris\u2019 bedchamber by Aphrodite who threatens to end her, tells him in no uncertain terms that she wishes he was dead. He replies like a total creep: \u201cWife, do not deride my courage with these hard taunts. This time Menelaus has beaten me with Athene\u2019s aid, and another time I shall beat him: there are gods on my side too.\u00a0[EDIT: What? WHAT? You were rescued by Aphrodite from a duel, a duel that in fact was solemnised by a sacrifice in order that the winner would take Helen home. You are not the winner. *resists urge to punch him in the face*]<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0No, come, let us enjoy the bed of love. Never before has desire so enveloped my heart, not even that first time when I stole you away from lovely Lakedaimon and sailed off with you in my seafaring ships\u2026\u201d Book 6.<\/strong><\/em>In modern language, this is something like \u2018I love it when you\u2019re angry\u2019, and \u2018I want to rape you like I\u2019ve never raped you before\u2026\u2019<\/strong>Nice<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

(Read the rest at Greek Myth Comix<\/a>)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Honestly, this artist is absolutely brilliant. She has an infographic of deaths in the Iliad<\/a>, which I would like framed on our living room wall, because it\u2019s epic. (<\u2013 lol get it? epic? EPIC?<\/em>)<\/p>\n

Oh, but the Iliad isn\u2019t your thing? No worries, because she\u2019s illustrated books 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, and 12 of the Odyssey<\/a>. But you don\u2019t like epics? Then go laugh hysterically at the myth comics<\/a>. The only way you won\u2019t like this site is if you don\u2019t like to read things from the culture that gave birth to Western Civilization, and if that\u2019s the case, you need help that I can\u2019t give you.<\/p>\n

As for me, I just discovered she also sells mugs <\/a>, which is literally the best thing that has ever happened to me. Trying to figure out what to get the Ogre for his birthday is totally not something I\u2019m going to have to worry about now. Seriously, stuff like this is why I \u2665 the internet.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

*Update: Actually, Jenks is a SHE, not a HE. <\/em><\/p>\n

\"shutterstock_190709654\"<\/a>
EPIC facepalm. (yeah, I know, I\u2019ll quit with the epic puns, already\u2026maybe)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This bit of amazingness is brought to you by Jenks at Greek Myth Comix. She* graciously allowed me to repost it here for y\u2019all, but you should definitely, definitely head over to her blog and check out the hilarious commentary that follows the comic. Here\u2019s an excerpt: Helen, after being forced to go to Paris\u2019 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1110,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[211,178],"class_list":["post-4773","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-awesome-stuff","tag-literature"],"yoast_head":"\nWhy Paris is Such an Utter Plonker - UPDATED<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"This bit of amazingness is brought to you by Jenks at Greek Myth Comix. 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