{"id":59525,"date":"2023-09-12T01:56:19","date_gmt":"2023-09-12T05:56:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/bibleandculture\/?p=59525"},"modified":"2023-08-22T15:40:40","modified_gmt":"2023-08-22T19:40:40","slug":"ten-things-that-make-no-sense-at-the-beach","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/bibleandculture\/2023\/09\/12\/ten-things-that-make-no-sense-at-the-beach\/","title":{"rendered":"Ten Things that Make No Sense at the Beach"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/a>I\u2019ve been going to North Myrtle Beach since the 1950s when I was a wee lad.\u00a0 And increasingly, I have observed people who come to the beach and their behavior makes no sense.\u00a0 Here\u2019s some of what I\u2019ve observed:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. People who come to the beach and do not go in the ocean, but instead swim in the hotel swimming pool, even if it is the size of a postage stamp.\u00a0 I mean they could have gone to a pool in their own home town.\u00a0 Why come to the beach and ignore the number one attraction there\u2014 the beach and the ocean.\u00a0 This makes no sense<\/li>\n
  2. People who do not dress appropriately on the beach. If you are grossly over-weight or out of shape, no one wants to see you in a tiny weeny bikini, or for the men in a speedo and T shirt\u2026\u2026 and while I\u2019m on this subject\u2014 attention teenage girls and young ladies\u2014 you apparently decided that this year there is a behind contest that you are entering, showing off your rear by wearing a g-string.\u00a0 \u00a0This looks painful, not attractive, and dare I say \u2018you are behind the times\u2019?<\/li>\n
  3. People who go to the beach and then decide to avoid seafood altogether, instead going to empty calorie fast food restaurants and junk food emporiums. Again, you can do this home.\u00a0 Did it occur to you that locally caught seafood might be good for you once in a blue moon when you are on vacation, and no I don\u2019t mean the over-fried kinds of fish, shrimp, etc.\u00a0 Repent and do better.<\/li>\n
  4. This trip to Cherry Grove it was over 100F heat index.\u00a0 Especially if you are fair skinned you needs lots of sun tan lotion.\u00a0 You just do.\u00a0 I saw far too many pink elephants on the beach this year, and I had not been consuming alcohol.<\/li>\n
  5. Parents who think it is o.k. to take 4-6 small kids to the miniature golf courses, and then monopolize the course by letting their kids have way too many tries to get a ball in the little hole, on hole after hole on the course, completely oblivious to the fact that there is an ever increasing line of peeved people behind them who would like to get in 18 holes of putt putt in less than 3 hours!\u00a0 And then said parents won\u2019t let others play through to the next hole and get ahead of them.\u00a0 So much for golf etiquette.<\/li>\n
  6. Shopping.\u00a0 The purpose of going to the beach is to get AWAY from \u2018shop until you drop\u2019 emporiums and have some down time at the beach.\u00a0 Beach, you see is kind of like heaven, there are no malls and no shopping there!\u00a0 O.K. it\u2019s alright to spend part of a rainy day at the beach at the Tanger Outlet buying some Sketchers or the like, or better, getting Christmas presents for others.\u00a0 But the beach is not for usual shopping expeditions.\u00a0 You\u2019re supposed to be enjoying\u2014 wait for it,\u00a0 your downtime with family and THE BEACH.<\/li>\n
  7. If you want to avoid expensive meals out at some of the nicer surf and turf restaurants in North Myrtle, then go to Platts Seafood or Boulineaus, and buy some fresh fish or shrimp or scallops, and cook your own.\u00a0 Most of you are staying in condos at the beach that have kitchens.\u00a0 You should use them.\u00a0 Surely someone in your family can cook.<\/li>\n
  8. Animals.\u00a0 I don\u2019t have a problem with locals walking your dog on the beach, as long as you scoop the poop.\u00a0 \u00a0For those of us who jog on the beach in the early mornings, make sure your dog is on a leash most of the time (when he\u2019s not chasing a ball), and make sure you clean up after them, and make sure they are not aggressive with total strangers and especially not with little kids who are vulnerable.<\/li>\n
  9. Weather.\u00a0 Thunderstorms are normal at the beach, especially in the late summer.\u00a0 You don\u2019t want to be messing around at the beach in the middle of lightning and thunder, and no\u2014 submerging yourself in the ocean during a storm does not protect you. I\u2019ve seen plenty of lightning strikes on the water.<\/li>\n
  10. There should be a sign at every beach \u2018DON\u2019T DRINK AND DIVE\u2019. People who have had too much to drink try the craziest things imaginable when swimming.\u00a0 I used to be a lifeguard and I have some tales I could tell.\u00a0 If you have consumed enough alcohol to impair your judgment, don\u2019t try: 1) jumping off a pier into the ocean (this happened recently at my beach); 2) swimming out too far where there are not only monster waves but the occasional shark, especially in later summer. 3) don\u2019t try body surfing when you are too impaired to catch a wave properly. You will be thrown to the bottom and get scraped up.\u00a0 \u00a0Do not become a beached whale, or the subject of someone\u2019s derisive Tik Tok video.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    \u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    I\u2019ve been going to North Myrtle Beach since the 1950s when I was a wee lad.\u00a0 And increasingly, I have observed people who come to the beach and their behavior makes no sense.\u00a0 Here\u2019s some of what I\u2019ve observed: People who come to the beach and do not go in the ocean, but instead swim […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":59441,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[13796,13793],"class_list":["post-59525","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-because-the-pacific-ocean-is-cold-even-in-summer-no-gulf-stream","tag-the-beach-boys-lied-to-us"],"yoast_head":"\nTen Things that Make No Sense at the Beach<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I've been going to North Myrtle Beach since the 1950s when I was a wee lad.\u00a0 And increasingly, I have observed 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