{"id":4623,"date":"2024-01-04T03:18:36","date_gmt":"2024-01-04T11:18:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/breathingspace\/?p=4623"},"modified":"2024-01-07T11:24:32","modified_gmt":"2024-01-07T19:24:32","slug":"spiritual-abuse-eternal-salvation-by-any-means-necessary","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/breathingspace\/2024\/01\/spiritual-abuse-eternal-salvation-by-any-means-necessary\/","title":{"rendered":"Spiritual Abuse: Eternal Salvation by Any Means Necessary"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

A few months ago, my daughter told me that she experienced spiritual abuse in some of the churches I pastored. <\/strong>How did I respond to this?<\/p>\n

Man with hand in front of his face saying, \"Please stop.\"<\/a>
Photo by RDNE Stock project<\/span><\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

<\/span>At first, I<\/span> became defensive.<\/strong> Certainly, I couldn\u2019t be guilty of spiritual abuse, I told her\u2014because this is what I told myself. Then, I talked with my other children, who agreed with what their sister said. As I processed all this, I had to admit that perhaps some spiritual abuse had taken place in my churches. Yet, my admission of guilt was not complete or genuine.<\/p>\n

<\/span>Still, I protected<\/span> myself by insisting that I had not been the real perpetrator.<\/strong> Instead, it must have been deacons or teachers within the churches who did such things. But it certainly couldn\u2019t have been me! But the more I have sat with the word \u201cabusive\u201d that she used to describe the manipulations of the church, the more I have come to understand that she is right. And I was not innocent of this crime. I participated in, and in fact led, many of the abusive strategies we employed to \u201cget people saved.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Abusive Strategies<\/h2>\n

<\/span>Here are a<\/span> few of the abusive tactics we used to save souls.<\/strong> We didn\u2019t think of them as abusive\u2014we thought we were being unshakably faithful. After all\u2014no tactic is off limits if it results in eternal salvation (or so we told ourselves).<\/p>\n