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The easiest path to joy, is to count your blessings.\u00a0 \u00a0This weekend, I saw all ten of my children \u2013not all at once, but over the course of the three days.\u00a0 My heart fluttered for much of the time.
\nHowever, we did have to drop one off at the airport today, and that\u2019s always hard on the spirit.\u00a0 Knowing I won\u2019t know when I will see them, I have to wait in joyful hope.<\/p>\n
At the end of the weekend, I looked at the schedule for the coming week. Crying seemed like a reasonable response.\u00a0 The summer ends tonight.\u00a0 Paul has cross country from 7:30-9 every day this week.\u00a0 \u00a0I have pre-services from 7:45-3.\u00a0 \u00a0Anna has orientation on \u2013well the calendar said Wednesday at the start of summer.\u00a0 It said Thursday as of the beginning of July.\u00a0 It now says Friday.\u00a0 Knowing that people who run schools likewise seek to retreat from starting school too soon makes me feel better about the world.\u00a0 \u00a0I wondered why I felt so stuck.
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\nMy daughter reminded me.\u00a0 All of my life is filtered through grief since December 3rd, and as I\u2019ve already said, I tend to box pain out.<\/p>\n
My brother received all the remaining k-cups from my mom\u2019s apartment.\u00a0 She bought in bulk and Friday, he drank the last k-cup.\u00a0 He used it as a ritual to remember her, and to pray.\u00a0 \u00a0I wished I\u2019d thought of such a touchstone for remembering Mom.\u00a0 Everything flooded my heart and at the same time, I felt like somehow I hadn\u2019t remembered her.\u00a0 I had, but the weight of not having a deliberate way, left me just mournful.\u00a0 I tried to remember her with things I do every day, chocolate, coke zero, prayer \u2013it didn\u2019t quite work.\u00a0 \u00a0Kept remembering after the fact.<\/p>\n
Habbit takes time, so I couldn\u2019t claim it yet.\u00a0 I\u2019d have to keep unboxing the grief.<\/p>\n
So I fretted, what to do.\u00a0 Dinner included clearing out the fridge and a cook out with a rain out of smash burgers.\u00a0 \u00a0The pile of dishes afterwards towered.\u00a0 \u00a0Somehow, I knew the pile scared everyone away.\u00a0 I opted to put on some tunes and do the dishes while dancing.\u00a0 The grief, the joy, all of it merged and I felt the weight lift.\u00a0 Mom, I love you.\u00a0 You\u2019re always with me.\u00a0 Just like I am always Mom, Mom is always with me.\u00a0 \u00a0I felt her hug, her presence, all of it.\u00a0 \u00a0Grieve your own way Sherry, there isn\u2019t a grade, there\u2019s just learning.<\/p>\n
Count, count, count the blessings, more than the dishes.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The easiest path to joy, is to count your blessings.\u00a0 \u00a0This weekend, I saw all ten of my children \u2013not all at once, but over the course of the three days.\u00a0 My heart fluttered for much of the time. However, we did have to drop one off at the airport today, and that\u2019s always hard […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4510,"featured_media":4304,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[957,1078],"class_list":["post-4301","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-blessings","tag-grief"],"yoast_head":"\n