Atlas Shrugged: Kill the Redshirts<\/a>.<\/i><\/p>\nCobra Commander:<\/b> Oh I wish I hadn\u2019t walked in on that.
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> I can explain! Wait\u2026 why should I have to explain!? Who are you and what are you doing in my house!?
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> I came because your wife was babbling on about you being the greatest villain in the world, morbid curiosity I suppose. I certainly didn\u2019t want to see you\u2026 ugh\u2026
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> Well I am a villain, don\u2019t you see! Right now I\u2019m cheating on my wife!
\nLillian Rearden:<\/b> And I on my husband, vile villains the both of us!
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> Yes yes, I\u2026 I can see way too much of that I think I\u2019m just going to see myself out.
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> No, I think it\u2019s finally time we truly revel in our real villainy here! Cheating on my wife, AHAHAHA! Purely because I wished to do so!
\nLillian Rearden:<\/b> Yes! Which is the literal exact same reasoning that my husband Hank had for cheating on me, damn his heroic act! He hated and loathed me and paid me no mind, and resented his marriage to me and threw himself into the arms of another woman while acting abusively to both I and her, like some sort of noble minded heroic genius!
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> Yes the only way we were able to have our revenge on him\u2026 on all of those heroes, was by doing the exact opposite of them! So I hated and loathed my wife and paid her no mind, and resented my marriage and threw myself into the arms of another woman while acting abusively to both you and her, like the most deplorable of villains!
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> You literally just repeated what she said! Also you\u2019re not wearing pants! For the love of all that is wicked in the world put on some pants!
\nLillian Rearden:<\/b> How dare you equate what we\u2019ve done to that detestably goody two-shoes Hank, my Husband who despite explicitly being pointed out to earlier as being absolutely terrible at working the inside Washington game, who even employed Wesley Mouch specifically to handle dealing with the underhanded politics because Hank couldn\u2019t understand them and was terrible at them, and was in fact so terrible that he didn\u2019t realize that Mouch was not only incompetent and bad at his job but actively betraying Hank\u2019s interests\u2026 my husband who despite all of that has bribed everyone in the legal system and maneuvered so adeptly and masterfully as to be able to ensure that his divorce with me will go off without a hitch! Just like a hero!
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> If you don\u2019t get out of the way of the door this instant\u2026
\n*CRACK*
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> Ow!
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> Well that\u2019s what you get for smacking a metal mask\u2026
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> Shut up! Where\u2019s my wife! I feel invigorated! I want to shout in her face how I married her entirely out of spite, as part of some long con where I could not be the kind of man she was actually looking for and watch her suffer on having chosen poorly, which also kind of doesn\u2019t make sense considering I kind of deluded myself into thinking that I\u2019m better than I am on some level, but whatever shut up I\u2019m so hopped up on adrenaline I can\u2019t even feel my broken hand! So take me to my wife right now!
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> ALRIGHT THAT\u2019S IT
\n*WHACK*
\nJames Taggart:<\/b> Aiiie!
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> I am going to have to burn these boots after kicking you there\u2026 but I\u2019ll take you to your wife and you can shout at her all you like from your adjoining cell.
\nJames Taggart (high pitched):<\/b> Thank you\u2026 making my wife miserable is all I think I may have ever truly enjoyed out of life\u2026
\nCobra Commander:<\/b> Oh I\u2019m just overjoyed that I could be of service.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Originally posted on Atlas Shrugged: Kill the Redshirts. Cobra Commander: Oh I wish I hadn\u2019t walked in on that. James Taggart: I can explain! Wait\u2026 why should I have to explain!? Who are you and what are you doing in my house!? Cobra Commander: I came because your wife was babbling on about you being […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1308,"featured_media":0,"parent":9712,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-12421","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"yoast_head":"\n
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