{"id":9755,"date":"2015-04-25T16:46:33","date_gmt":"2015-04-25T16:46:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/daylightatheism\/?page_id=9755"},"modified":"2015-04-25T16:46:33","modified_gmt":"2015-04-25T16:46:33","slug":"iii-i-1","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/daylightatheism\/series\/atlas-shrugged\/the-cobra-commander-dialogues\/iii-i-1\/","title":{"rendered":"The Cobra Commander Dialogues: III.I.1"},"content":{"rendered":"<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC \"-\/\/W3C\/\/DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional\/\/EN\" \"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/TR\/REC-html40\/loose.dtd\">\n<html><head><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><\/head><body><p><i>Originally posted on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/daylightatheism\/2015\/04\/atlas-shrugged-welcome-to-atlantis\/#comment-1972822589\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\">Atlas Shrugged: Welcome to Atlantis<\/a>.<\/i><\/p>\n<p><b>John Galt:<\/b> Hey, what are you doing here?<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Well at the moment I\u2019m watching you leer creepily over an injured woman.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> I\u2019m just waiting on her to wake up.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Wait how did she get out of the plane? The plane that\u2026 didn\u2019t crash what the heck?<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Oh it just sort of settled down despite having an unconscious pilot. And don\u2019t worry she was flung.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Well if the plane didn\u2019t crash how was she flung? And this isn\u2019t like a car wreck if you get flung out of a plane I\u2019m not sure you\u2019ll just suffer a wang on the head.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Well she landed in a very soft meadow!<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Okay one that doesn\u2019t explain how she was \u2018flung\u2019 and two why aren\u2019t you getting medical help for her yet?<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Well I have to wait for her to wake up so it\u2019s all a bit more dramatic right? I mean she\u2019ll see my handsome metal face and be all swoony and I\u2019ll know her name because she\u2019s secretly so super and special that the most handsome metal faced man in the world has been keeping tabs on her all along.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Look pal, if there\u2019s one handsome metal face around here it\u2019s mine. Not that I\u2019d want Dagny in the first place.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> And why not? She\u2019s objectively the most perfect woman ever. Which of course means both that all heroes are madly in love with her and that all actions she takes are ultimately meaningless to the narrative as I, the most heroic of the heroic men, am the sole driver of all action and plot resolution.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Well I guess it\u2019s lucky I\u2019m a villain then. But I mean come on you\u2019re still going on about that hero thing?<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Well of course. I\u2019m the most heroic of all possible heroes. Did I explain how handsome I was? I can go on quite at length about it. I look like I\u2019m super full of myself and look like I\u2019m constantly violently enraged except that I\u2019m so perfect I\u2019m never actually angry I just constantly have the feel of pure hatred on me, which is apparently attractive.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> How is any of that attractive!?<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Well it\u2019s what Dagny would find attractive, and as she is the perfect woman whoever she, or by extension say any woman who would write a story about our lives in which Dagny is a painfully obvious author surrogate for example, finds attractive must be the most attractive objectively.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> I don\u2019t think you\u2019re using the word objectively correct.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Oh no I\u2019m pretty sure I\u2019ll go ahead and just define that word to mean whatever I like and then it will be correct, yes.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Honestly I don\u2019t care enough to argue the point, since I\u2019m pretty sure you would just redefine all my words to make me sound like I was arguing something else anyways\u2026<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> I would, yes.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> So we\u2019ll just move back to the hero villain thing. I mean I know I bring this up an awful lot\u2026<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> You do, I\u2019ve seen it.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Have you been spying on me?<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Probably? I think it\u2019s implied I know everything happening with everyone. Obviously I\u2019ve had the time to keep tabs on the entire world while setting up this secret location and destroying the world and doing oh god like a whole bunch of other stuff behind the scenes always perfectly and without ever a wasted action.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Obviously.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Objectively even.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Ugh. ANYWAYS I figured if anyone wasn\u2019t buying into this delusion it was the person who is supposed to be the smartest one here.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> No we\u2019re definitely heroes. I mean we have a secret base.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Kept invisible to the world by holograms!<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Yes, can\u2019t have the world finding out about us.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> The only kinds of people who make hidden bases are villains like me! It\u2019s\u2026 it\u2019s definitely a villain thing! Also how did you guys even invent hologram shielding technology!?<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Objectively speaking, when you\u2019re as intelligent as I am, anything is possible.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> So you could\u2019ve fixed all the problems and saved the world.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> I am doing that. By hiding in a hidden hole in the mountains while I wait for everyone else to starve to death in the ruins of the world left behind.<br>\n<b>Cobra Commander:<\/b> Like a hero.<br>\n<b>John Galt:<\/b> Objectively speaking.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Originally posted on Atlas Shrugged: Welcome to Atlantis. John Galt: Hey, what are you doing here? Cobra Commander: Well at the moment I\u2019m watching you leer creepily over an injured woman. John Galt: I\u2019m just waiting on her to wake up. Cobra Commander: Wait how did she get out of the plane? The plane that\u2026 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1308,"featured_media":0,"parent":9712,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-9755","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The Cobra Commander Dialogues: III.I.1 - Daylight Atheism<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Originally posted on Atlas Shrugged: Welcome to Atlantis. John Galt: Hey, what are you doing here? 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