{"id":260735,"date":"2017-12-11T12:55:11","date_gmt":"2017-12-11T17:55:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/aleteia.org\/?post_type=post&p=260735"},"modified":"2017-12-11T12:55:11","modified_gmt":"2017-12-11T17:55:11","slug":"dear-fellow-parishioners-a-jaw-dropping-note-to-parents-about-their-child-in-church","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/deaconsbench\/2017\/12\/dear-fellow-parishioners-a-jaw-dropping-note-to-parents-about-their-child-in-church\/","title":{"rendered":"‘Dear Fellow Parishioners…’: A jaw-dropping note to parents about their child in church"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

I was flabbergasted to see this note on Facebook this morning, complaining about a child\u2019s behavior during Mass. The mother posted it from an anonymous parishioner at her church:<\/p>\n

Dear Fellow Parishioners:<\/p>\n

I am writing this note on behalf of all parishioners at the 10:45 Mass. I sincerely wish I didn\u2019t have to write this note. But I believe you must know how disruptive your son can be. Many of us missed the first two readings because we couldn\u2019t hear over your son\u2019s disruption. You must have missed the bulletin where Father Bob addressed this issue. He said to remove your child from the congregation. Go behind the glass wall separation when he is noisy. Return when and if your child has settled down.<\/p>\n

It is so unfair to those of us who have come to Mass to pray and worship. We are urging you to be considerate. Merry Christmas!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I don\u2019t know what could possibly prompt a parishioner to write something like that. Children, we all know, can be a handful. But what was the author of that note thinking<\/em>? It is uncharitable to the point of being cruel\u2014and it flies in the face of Christ\u2019s own words, \u201cLet the children come to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

Related: A Letter to the Lady Annoyed by my Kids at Mass<\/a> <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Small children are a great gift, and a reminder to us all that the faith is growing. We need them. And we need them (and their parents!) to feel welcome. You want to kill the church? Notes like that are a good start.<\/p>\n

The mother who received it wrote of her shock at getting this in the mail:<\/p>\n

Not once have we felt unwelcome at our church. We have a 3-year-old son with a very outgoing personality so at times he is louder than he should be at Mass. I don\u2019t want to remove him for every noise because then he won\u2019t learn to sit and be quiet and experience church for what it\u2019s all about. Our church does not have a children\u2019s room or nursery. The other side of glass wall is part of the gathering space which our son would just run around in. We\u2019ve talked to our priest and he doesn\u2019t seem to mind unless the child is extremely disruptive. This makes me so sad. A church that isn\u2019t crying is dying, right? I think what bothered me most is that this person said \u201con behalf of all parishioners,\u201d where we\u2019ve only gotten lots of compliments and encouragement before.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I was reminded of St. Thomas More Parish in Lynchburg, Virginia. I visited there<\/a> <\/strong>a couple years back and discovered this:<\/p>\n

Lying on the table in the gathering area was a stack of cards for parents, with the following advice printed on them. I\u2019m told it comes from the parish of St. Juan Diego in the Archdiocese of Portland, OR.<\/p>\n

TO THE PARENTS OF OUR YOUNG CHILDREN, MAY WE SUGGEST\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n