There was a time when I did not believe in the Immaculate Conception. And then, I did. How does one go from complete disbelief to belief? Grace. It\u2019s all grace.<\/strong><\/p>\n On July 16, 2004. I caught the tail-end of a Journey Home program (EWTN), and I was immediately drawn to that night\u2019s guest. On a whim, I wrote Mary Beth Kremski and attempted to explain something that I didn\u2019t completely understand myself \u2013 my growing desire to enter the Catholic Church.<\/p>\n I had been fascinated by Mrs. Kremski because she was a Third Order Carmelite \u2013 or at least that\u2019s what the tag line at the bottom of the television screen said. I didn\u2019t know what Third Order meant, but I knew that the authors of the books I had recently read were Carmelites. St. John of the Cross and St. Teresa of Avila \u2013 only they lived in the 1500s. I had no idea that there were Carmelites living and breathing today! What luck! I had to write her. I had so many questions.<\/p>\n We exchanged just one set of letters in August, and then the communication ended. I turned my attention to the local Catholic Church and decided to try RCIA class and see what would happen from there.<\/p>\n In December of 2004, the RCIA leader at my parish introduced the class to the Church\u2019s teaching on the Immaculate Conception. I\u2019ve come to the conclusion that our Blessed Mother was gently guiding me through this part of my journey, but at that moment in time, she seemed to be nothing more than one major stumbling block for me.<\/p>\n I announced to the entire class that I couldn\u2019t accept that Mary was conceived without sin. I was willing to admit that Protestants had let the pendulum swing too far in the opposite direction, relegating Mary to a minor role in the Christmas story, but I felt that was in response to excessive Catholic Mariology. I explained that, while I believed the Lord could do that for Mary, I was convinced it was highly unlikely that he did do it. At that moment, I didn\u2019t even have enough faith to say, I believe, Lord help my unbelief.<\/p>\n The terrible thought hit me then. Where does one go when she believes in Apostolic Succession, the Papacy, Purgatory, the Communion of Saints, and all Catholic Teaching, except the Immaculate Conception? What was the name of that denomination? I felt like Peter when he said, where else can we go? This is a difficult teaching, Lord, but I\u2019ve nowhere else to turn.<\/p>\n After many attempts to help me understand, my RCIA instructor mentioned that I had the option of placing a petition before the Blessed Mother. If I had sincerely given myself to the task of understanding and I still couldn\u2019t embrace this teaching, he told me that I could always ask Mary to show me the Truth.<\/p>\n As an Evangelical, I had placed many petitions before the Lord. That was not a new concept. And I didn\u2019t have a problem with asking Mary to answer my petition. I just didn\u2019t think she would do it.<\/p>\n I knew a lot was riding on this petition. The Immaculate Conception was the one obstacle that stood between my father (a Presbyterian minister) and the Catholic Church. In fact, if he could have resolved this issue, I\u2019m convinced he would have converted to the Catholic Church thirty years ago. Before I made my petition to Mary, I prayed, \u201cLord, I will follow you wherever you lead, even if it is down a road my father could not take. I just want to get this right. And so, I beg You NOT to answer the petition I place before Your Mother if this teaching shouldn\u2019t be embraced.\u201d Then I turned my heart to Mary and laid it on the line:<\/p>\n Mary, If you are as the Catholic Church says and if you love me, please answer this petition. I want someone to communicate with me by your inspiration. I need the communication to encourage me in the faith, and I don\u2019t want it to be from Catholic friends at the school where I used to teach or my Catholic in-laws. I don\u2019t want it to be from anyone in my parish. All of them\u2014well, I have shared this struggle with some of them, and they may know through earthly tongues that I need to be propped up. Mary, I want the message to come from you to the ears of one who could know no other way. Please choose someone who, for me, would represent the Universal Catholic Church. Then I will know I am right where I am supposed to be and that the Church\u2019s Teachings are ALL correct, terra firma, especially the Teachings about you. Please answer my petition before the end of the year\u2014I know, that\u2019s just two weeks.<\/p>\n This petition is rewritten word-for-word from my journal entry for December 12, 2004, the day I said the prayer. I knew it was unlikely I would receive a response. Almost as unlikely as the Immaculate Conception, I thought.<\/p>\n Our Lady didn\u2019t make me wait very long. In the mailbox the next day was a letter from the woman who had appeared on The Journey Home the previous July. I had not heard from her since August when her one and only letter arrived. BUT, in December of 2004 she decided to write me a second time to encourage me in the Faith and let me know she was praying for me. Her letter was dated December 8, 2004. Above the date, she had hand-written The Feast of the Immaculate Conception. With tears streaming down my face, I read her two-page, single-spaced letter.<\/p>\n I had been ready to abandon the journey. I knew it would drive me crazy to teeter on the fence for very long. That\u2019s why I had put a time restriction on the Blessed Virgin. That letter sealed everything for me. Like Thomas when he touched the wounds of Our Lord, all my doubts were gone instantly.<\/p>\n Mary is my Mother! And like the truest mother, she loves me and knows me better than I know myself. After all, she knew the very thing I would ask of her before I even asked it. Mary Beth Kremski\u2019s letter had been dated four days before I made the petition, arriving less than twenty-four hours after my request for help. Our Lady proved herself to be the Immaculate Conception and a Mother with impeccable timing.<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" There was a time when I did not believe in the Immaculate Conception. And then, I did. How does one go from complete disbelief to belief? Grace. It\u2019s all grace. On July 16, 2004. I caught the tail-end of a Journey Home program (EWTN), and I was immediately drawn to that night\u2019s guest. On a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2224,"featured_media":311,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[227,253,307,489,492],"class_list":["post-310","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-immaculate-conception","tag-learning-to-believe","tag-mother-mary","tag-what-is-the-immaculate-conception","tag-why-do-catholics-believe-in-the-immaculate-conception"],"yoast_head":"\n