Breitbart Steals Celebrity Jewel From WND

Breitbart Steals Celebrity Jewel From WND February 2, 2012

It appears that the Worldnutdaily is finally getting some competition in the vital “dumb, washed up celebrities saying really stupid shit about religion and politics” market. WND may have Pat Boone, Chuck Norris and Victoria Jackson, but Breitbart’s Big Hollywood site now features Kirk Cameron. And he’s promoting his inspiring new movie.

For the past year and a half, I’ve been making a film called “Monumental,” and I am thrilled to announce that it’s coming to theaters on March 27. We are creating a live, one-night national event in 500 theaters where audiences can experience a monumental moment together. Then we will release the film in theaters in select cities, while providing helpful new resources to families, churches, and schools who want to go further with what they’ve experienced in the film.

In the film I retrace the footsteps of our Founders from England to America in the hope of discovering our true “national treasure.” I wanted to listen to them, to learn from them. Our forefathers knew we were a forgetful people, that someday we would lose our way as a nation. So they left us “maps” that would guide us back to the source of America’s success. What I discovered is amazing! This is one of the most important journeys of my life. America is worth fighting for, and so are our families. We can still be a “city upon a hill,” but we need to work together. With God’s help, we can turn this thing around. It’s been said, “Footprints in history are not made sitting down,” and I couldn’t agree more. I hope that our children will mark this moment as the turning point when we stood up, came together, and reclaimed the true national treasure of America.

In the film, he reveals that the Founding Fathers all ate bananas, proving that they were right-wing Christians who hated Charles Darwin (before he was born) and that Jesus delivered the Constitution via winged chariot to George Washington while he took communion, with an American flag lapel pin on his jacket and Lee Greenwood singing Proud to Be an American behind him.

"I think someone said she had been working for him for that long, so it's ..."

Trump Thinks WaPo and NY Times ..."
"I am a skeptical consumer of news. Pardon me if I refuse to take the ..."

Dobbs Wants Most CIA and FBI ..."
"I never read the fourth Dune book, but the fifth one is pretty good."

Trump Thinks WaPo and NY Times ..."
"Constitutional Conservatives believe in the rule of law. We're not savages. Democrats will be granted ..."

Dobbs Wants Most CIA and FBI ..."

Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!


TRENDING AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • James C.

    So is this going to be a mockumentary like Drive Thru History, or is it going to be a low-budget ripoff of National Treasure? Not like either option is going to be watchable, but Banana Jr. isn’t quite clear here.

  • I thought the national treasure was Nicolas Cage. Personally, I don’t understand, and never found him to be attractive or a good actor. But if Kirk Cameron wants to “reclaim” him in 60 seconds,.. hey whatever floats your boat.

  • Uh-huhh…

    I bet you fifty bucks it’s going to be misinterpretation of the words of the Founders, reimagining their words ala Barton, myths and hearsay about their actions, and saying “see, America was a Christian Nation all along!”

  • I never heard of Kirk Cameron until now. After watching the trailer I have to ask: what’s he famous for?

  • Phillip IV

    And he’s promoting his inspiring new movie.

    The question is only, what will it inspire? Yawning? Laughter? Vomiting?

    We can still be a “city upon a hill,”

    I notice he left out the adjective “shining”. Doesn’t want to set his sights too high, I take it.

    What’s so great about being a city upon a hill, anyway? Rome is a city on seven hills.

  • starskeptic

    Seriously Ed, your description in the last paragraph beats a lot of stuff on the tube nowadays – I’d watch it – as long as Mo had a cameo…

  • marcus

    However, “butt-prints in history” are another matter entirely, they are made by sitting down. I predict that mine are going to be at least as impressive as Cameron’s “footprints”. (Ed may beat us both.)

  • Nemo

    @reverendrodney:

    I never heard of Kirk Cameron until now. After watching the trailer I have to ask: what’s he famous for?

    The sitcom “Growing Pains”.

    Ah, an excuse to talk about “National Treasure”. I went into the original movie prepared to hate it — I was really offended by the concept, from what I’d heard — but I was pleasantly surprised. I thought it turned out to be a great patriotic (and not jingoistic) movie, when it wasn’t being a decent Indiana Jones knock off. Nic Cage’s character definitely understood that the front side of the document was the important one.

    The sequel was pretty dull, though.

  • Chris from Europe

    @holytape

    Cage’s orginal last name is Coppola. He doesn’t need to be a good actor.

  • Chris from Europe

    The sitcom “Growing Pains”.

    He ruined his character when he became a nut.

  • fastlane

    In the film, he reveals that the Founding Fathers all ate bananas, proving that they were right-wing Christians who hated Charles Darwin (before he was born) and that Jesus delivered the Constitution via winged chariot to George Washington while he took communion, with an American flag lapel pin on his jacket and Lee Greenwood singing Proud to Be an American behind him.

    This sounds way better than what would actually come from these yahoos.

  • John Hinkle

    Then we will release the film in theaters in select cities, while providing helpful new resources to families, churches, and schools who want to go further with what they’ve experienced in the film.

    So the movie is one big commercial? You know, I was thinking about seeing it, but now that he dropped that spoiler, I so want to pay money to see a 90 minute advertisement. I want to buy those “helpful new resources”… well, as long as there’s a toy inside.

  • Chiroptera

    Our forefathers knew we were a forgetful people, that someday we would lose our way as a nation. So they left us “maps” that would guide us back to the source of America’s success.

    Actually, our Founders realized that they didn’t really know what would make a successful democratic republic, that their attempts contained a lot of mundane compromises among the political factions of that time, and that the environment of their descendents would be very different than theirs.

    And they fully expected that their descendents would learn as we went along (hopefully learning from their and our mistakes), improve what needed to be improved, make our own compromises among our own political factions, and adapt to the changing circumstances along the way.

  • exdrone

    Chris from Europe @10 says:

    The sitcom “Growing Pains”.

    He ruined his character when he became a nut.

    Agreed, and this is the low start point from which he descended into celebrity christian advocacy.

  • Pingback: An Ethics of Operate()