For the second time this week I’m going to criticize a Worldnutdaily columnist not for the content of what they’ve written — though the content is almost always terrible too — but for how bad their writing is. Having given weekly columns to a minivan full of quasi-celebrities and has-beens, the WND is now stuck with paragraphs like this one from former MLB pitcher John Rocker:
The human psyche generally and most times unintentionally must consider feelings, emotions, current circumstances and “gut” instincts when determining heads or tails as it relates to an important pending choice. Most times these intangible sources that affect our ability to decide are simply and collectively referred to as “heart.” When cold truths and logic tell us to go right, occasionally our hearts override, and a left turn is made – sometimes for the better, more often than not, however, to our detriment, leaving us weeks, months or possibly years later reminding ourselves what case blatant logic had presented.
Holy run-on sentences, Batman. It doesn’t get any better:
Looking back at the facts that were/are undeniable regarding now-President Obama’s pre-presidential life, nothing leading up to the election of 2008 would have given anyone the reality on which to base an argument as to why Barack Obama was up to the task of fixing the problems that existed within the world’s largest economy, managing the most powerful military ever known to man or successfully dealing with a host of other concerns that were and in most cases still are of great importance to many in our society. To formulate a decision based solely on the grounds of fundamental logic would have told anyone that an individual who possessed no academic legacy, had authored no significant piece of legislation at the state or federal level, functioned at the rudimentary task of “community organizer” in his not-too-distant past, while having strong ties to known terrorists such as Bill Ayers and America-hating characters such as Jeremiah Wright, could not aptly perform the duties that would be demanded.
Yet, while considering the many facts that should have made this man an almost laughable candidate, against all logic he was elected our 44th president. So why, or more importantly how, has a man who has draped himself in mediocrity his entire existence risen perhaps to the pinnacle of mankind?
A man who became famous mostly for saying bigoted things about people on a subway is calling a man who was editor of the Harvard Law Review mediocre. You can’t make this shit up. John Rocker would need several promotions to become mediocre.
