{"id":92,"date":"2012-02-09T21:22:00","date_gmt":"2012-02-10T04:22:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs\/"},"modified":"2016-05-02T11:26:34","modified_gmt":"2016-05-02T17:26:34","slug":"barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html","title":{"rendered":"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>
<\/div>\n

While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, \u201cBlessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you nursed.\u201d He replied, \u201cRather, blessed are those who hear the word of God and observe it.\u201d<\/i> (Luke 11:27-28)<\/i><\/p>\n

Wombs. They\u2019re all over the news cycle lately. What\u2019s in them or not in them, and how to keep it that way. To whom they belong. Whither they\u2019ve gone a-wandering. Uteri and the women who tote them around have not been this much a focus of national and ecclesial attention, it seems to me, since my sister and brother eighth graders at Immaculate Heart of Mary Grammar School received what passed as sex education in early 1960s Catholicism: poor embarrassed Father Hernandez sternly cautioning us not to even think about what\u2019s Down There.<\/p>\n

With the number of reproductive issues making headlines in just the few weeks since the Roe v Wade<\/i> anniversary and March for Life\u2013the HHS mandate requiring coverage of free contraceptive services as preventive health care, the Susan G Komen Foundation\u2019s defunding-refunding-of-Planned-Parenthood whiplash, the decision<\/a> of student health services at Pennsylvania\u2019s Shippensburg University to make the morning-after pill available in vending machines (Shippensburg? vending machines? I can\u2019t believe this isn\u2019t The Onion<\/i>), and today a blossoming social media campaign (euphemistically titled Stop the War on Women<\/i>) against Ohio\u2019s proposed Heartbeat Bill<\/a>, which would prohibit abortions once a fetal heartbeat is detectable\u2013it\u2019s hard to escape the uterine politics. Even before all these stories heated up, though, I\u2019ve had a young woman, upon finding out over beers with the Shakespeare group I volunteer for that I was Catholic, recoil in horror and yell, \u201cYou can\u2019t have my womb!\u201d It took a couple more beers to convince her I truly didn\u2019t want it, and neither did the Pope.<\/p>\n

On top of the political womb wars, there are the barking cheerleaders. I\u2019ve been following with fascination this story as it unfolds on the TODAY Show<\/i>\u2013a group of young women from a high school in upstate New York, most of them popular, pretty, and active in the arts and sports, exhibiting the onset of sudden, uncontrollable, persistent Tourette\u2019s-like twitches and verbal tics. The outbreak began with one cheerleader\u2013\u201cI used to cheer every day,\u201d she said mournfully in an interview, \u201cbut I can\u2019t do that anymore\u201d\u2013and spread quickly and mysteriously. Environmental toxins have mostly been ruled out (though the real, non-Julia Roberts Erin Brockovich is leading a team looking into a twenty-year-old train derailment), and the girls and their parents vehemently reject both stress and faking as explanations. Dr Laszlo Mechtler, the neurologist working with most of those afflicted, identifies it as conversion disorder\u2013otherwise known as mass psychogenic disease, or mass hysteria. \u201cIt\u2019s a disorder that occurs in small groups, especially girls in schools in small towns,\u201d Dr Mechtler told TODAY<\/a>. \u201cIn the last 100 years, most of the cases have occurred in factories, in schools, or in nunneries.\u201d Nunneries?<\/i><\/p>\n

A cluster of afflicted girls. The teens of that small town called Salem, pinched and slapped by invisible forces. Mass fainting on the factory assembly line. Repressed virgins walled up in convents, meowing like cats. That\u2019s hysteria for you. And relabel it as you will, DSM, I\u2019m convinced we\u2019ve never lost the belief of Galen and the other Greco-Roman physicians that hysteria is exactly what its name means in Greek: a wandering womb, an untethered lady part gone rogue. Galen\u2019s contemporary, Aretaeus of Cappadocia, described the womb as<\/div>\n

. . . very much like an independent animal within the body, for it moves around and is quite erratic. It likes fragrant smells and moves toward them, but it dislikes foul odors and moves away from them.<\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

This movement of that independent animal up and away from the \u201cfoul odors\u201d Down There (think that concept is archaic? count the ads for \u201cfeminine freshness\u201d products that fill the airwaves of daytime TV) presses on the internal organs, according to Aretaeus, interfering with breathing and causing swooning, coughing, and strangled sounds. The ancient prescription was, much like today\u2019s ads, to apply fragrant smells Down There to coax the wandering womb back into place.<\/p>\n

The Victorian notion of hysteria was an unseemly sexual itch, encouraging licentious behavior. Cures ranged from clitorectomy to the use of vibrating devices to reduce the tension. Freud, whose first couch occupants were hysterics, identified the source of the problem as sexual repression\u00a0(hence the frequency of hysteria among Puritans and nuns) and\u00a0decided something a little more phallic than fragrant was what needed to be applied to put the uterus in its place.<\/p>\n

I can tell you, from first-hand experience, that they were all wrong. I haven\u2019t had a uterus in six years, since it wandered off hand-in-hand with the Big C, and everyone I know can testify that this has not stopped me from becoming hysterical at the slightest provocation. And those barking cheerleaders in NY? It\u2019s hard to imagine that they\u2013or any 17-year-olds in this society, no matter how small the town\u2013are suffering from a repressive sexual climate. The opposite, maybe: it has to be insanely stressful to be a teenage girl right now.<\/p>\n

What I think is that wombs and the women around them are, and always have been, damned scary. Even to ourselves, a lot of the time. Reproductive capability (as the Institute of Medicine calls it, in defining it as one of the risk factors for the \u201cdisease\u201d of pregnancy\u2013the other risk factor being being female) is a whacking great mystery, no matter how much we think we learn about biology or think we can control with chemistry. It can all go so wrong. One minute the woman you are or the woman you love is the Great Mother, nurturing and compassionate; the next minute she, you, is (like the name of one of my favorite beers) a Raging Bitch. A barking cheerleader. Shakespeare\u2019s Lear, perhaps echoing the Bard\u2019s own conflicted relationship with the feminine, speaks some of the most terrifying words ever written about my sex:<\/p>\n

Down from the waist they are centaurs,<\/i>
\nThough women all above.<\/i>
\nBut to the girdle do the gods inherit,<\/i>
\nThe rest is all the fiend\u2019s; there\u2019s hell, there\u2019s darkness,<\/i>
\nThere is the sulphurous pit\u2013burning, scalding, stench, consumption . . .<\/i>
\n(King Lear, IV:6)<\/i><\/p>\n

Put next to that, in relief, the words of Jesus in Luke\u2019s Gospel, with which I began this reflection. The fruit of the world\u2019s most blessed womb refuses to separate people into parts. He argues for a notion of blessed humanity that transcends gender\u2013not in some false unisex erasing of differences, but in the beatific vision that sees a broken world\u2019s fearful dichotomies restored to redeemed wholeness. Listening to, truly hearing the Word of God in its fullness, observing it in faithfulness, stills the clamor. The wandering wombs, weary of politics, come home to rest. The tics and barks subside, and we can cheer again.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, \u201cBlessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you nursed.\u201d He replied, \u201cRather, blessed are those who hear the word of God and observe it.\u201d (Luke 11:27-28) Wombs. They\u2019re all over the news cycle […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1086,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-92","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nBarking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, "Blessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, "Blessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Egregious Twaddle\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-02-10T04:22:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2016-05-02T17:26:34+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Joanne McPortland\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Joanne McPortland\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html\",\"name\":\"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2012-02-10T04:22:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2016-05-02T17:26:34+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#\/schema\/person\/988428e355d44143e36a5215d7f0a071\"},\"description\":\"While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, \\\"Blessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/\",\"name\":\"Egregious Twaddle\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#\/schema\/person\/988428e355d44143e36a5215d7f0a071\",\"name\":\"Joanne McPortland\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32f1d9bc6c1a69b90e3b6e9f40141056?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32f1d9bc6c1a69b90e3b6e9f40141056?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Joanne McPortland\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/author\/joannemcportland\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs","description":"While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, \"Blessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs","og_description":"While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, \"Blessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you","og_url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html","og_site_name":"Egregious Twaddle","article_published_time":"2012-02-10T04:22:00+00:00","article_modified_time":"2016-05-02T17:26:34+00:00","author":"Joanne McPortland","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Joanne McPortland","Est. reading time":"6 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html","name":"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#website"},"datePublished":"2012-02-10T04:22:00+00:00","dateModified":"2016-05-02T17:26:34+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#\/schema\/person\/988428e355d44143e36a5215d7f0a071"},"description":"While he was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to him, \"Blessed is the womb that carried you and blessed are the breasts at which you","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/2012\/02\/barking-cheerleaders-wandering-wombs.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Barking Cheerleaders, Wandering Wombs"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/","name":"Egregious Twaddle","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#\/schema\/person\/988428e355d44143e36a5215d7f0a071","name":"Joanne McPortland","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32f1d9bc6c1a69b90e3b6e9f40141056?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32f1d9bc6c1a69b90e3b6e9f40141056?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Joanne McPortland"},"url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/author\/joannemcportland"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1086"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=92"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=92"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=92"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/egregioustwaddle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=92"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}