I am cohabitating with Longing. I refuse to commit long-term. Secretly I am hoping to soon bump into the real thing.<\/p>\n And when I do I\u2019ll come home, swing open the door of my house and declare loudly, \u201cIt\u2019s over. It\u2019s not me. It\u2019s you.\u201d<\/p>\n But until then I can\u2019t quite let go of what I have- this longing that drapes itself confidently across my four-poster bed, my antique purple couch, my stitched up mending heart.<\/p>\n She is supple and strong but stretches out lazily as if every month is June.<\/p>\n I watch her.<\/p>\n I take her in, every slight movement that threatens to edge me out,<\/p>\n to push me beyond my repeatedly demarcated lines of what\u2019s acceptable.<\/p>\n Longing can be horrid with boundaries.<\/p>\n It is odd but her presence reminds me to keep alert and open. To pay attention.<\/p>\n She leaves her things carelessly around the house.<\/p>\n The open journal.<\/p>\n The teasing scarf.<\/p>\n The more she takes over the clearer I am on what I work towards, pray towards, love towards.<\/p>\n And there is really a lot to be said for learning to live with her,<\/p>\n for a willingness to tolerate the discomfort, the lazy forcefulness of her.<\/p>\n There is a lot to be said for choosing to share my life space with her<\/p>\n without yet feeling the need to make peace.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I am cohabitating with Longing. I refuse to commit long-term. Secretly I am hoping to soon bump into the real thing. And when I do I\u2019ll come home, swing open the door of my house and declare loudly, \u201cIt\u2019s over. It\u2019s not me. It\u2019s you.\u201d But until then I can\u2019t quite let go of what […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":533,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-177","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n