Rule #2 and ff: Take a shot<\/strong>: every time I emphasize that there are lots of different ways to be gay (\/queer <\u2013 see, there it is) and lots of different ways to be Catholic.<\/p>\nsubmission, surrender, ecstasy (you have to do a shot for each)<\/p>\n
THE SMITHS<\/p>\n
Oscar Wilde (this one gets rough)<\/p>\n
humiliation is awesome, more people should try it<\/p>\n
sarcasticaps e.g. Grand Unified Theory of Lesbianism, Night of the Screaming Sweet Potatoes (I\u2019m so glad my editors made me kill most of these but you can find TWO on page 27 alone)<\/p>\n
AA-speak, e.g. \u201ckeep your own side of the street clean,\u201d \u201cdefects of character,\u201d you can decide whether you think \u201cbeing of service\u201d counts (take two shots if I don\u2019t flag it but you recognize it\u2013although wait, why are you playing this game? uh, no judgment, you do you)<\/p>\n
selective feminism<\/p>\n
class warfare<\/p>\n
lol bishops, whatever<\/em> aka my anti-clericalism<\/p>\n\u201cmy parents are the greatest, you shut up\u201d<\/p>\n
French, why is there so much French in this book?<\/p>\n
I actually quote the Bible\u2013it does happen sometimes!<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t like choice and I\u2019m not good at it<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t want to solve our problems; I want us to have more-Christian problems.<\/p>\n
I fight #orthodoxerasure<\/p>\n
no really, I love punk feminism and especially<\/em> \u201970s lesbian feminism and you\u2019re gonna hear all about it (I am not a feminist)<\/p>\nRule #\u2026 next<\/strong>: I think I cut out all the places where I say I don\u2019t believe in advice and then immediately give advice, but if you catch one, finish your drink<\/strong>. I\u2019m not trying to tell you what to do, but in my experience, it\u2019ll make you feel much better.<\/p>\nWhen you regain consciousness<\/strong>, offer up your hangover for the lucky souls in Purgatory.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Because if it weren\u2019t for bad taste, I\u2019d have no taste at all. First, preorder my book! Then read it, I guess, if you have to. While you\u2019re reading, play along. Rule #1: Drink what I drink. If I had to suffer through Olde English\u2013let alone vodka and chocolate milk\u2013so should you. Rule #2 and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1071,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,10,177],"tags":[172,1264,1265],"class_list":["post-8720","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gay-catholic-whatnot","category-self-obsessed","category-too-much-is-never-enough","tag-every-day-is-self-parody-day","tag-gay-catholic-whatnot","tag-self-obsessed"],"yoast_head":"\n
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