when I adopted Calvin and Hops? <\/a>Well there\u2019s a funny story as to which one got named Hops and which one got named Calvin. They\u2019re twins, see, especially in appearances. So I decided to mark Calvin\u2019s ear with a Sharpie dot so I could tell them apart. When I went into the house to get the Sharpie, I told my daughter to keep tabs on which one was which so I wouldn\u2019t be confused and Sharpie Hops instead. I think she told me right. But I didn\u2019t mark right, because I got interrupted by a grandchild or a grasshopper or a raindrop or something. I did in fact end up Sharpie-ing Hops, which meant that the bunny who is chipper and ADD and spastic became Calvin, and Hops, who is melancholy and slow and in serious need of some Zoloft, became Hops.<\/p>\nCute story, huh? Unfortunately, it doesn\u2019t end so cute for poor Hops. I went out to feed the fuzz balls about a week ago, and noticed Hops sporting a small lump on his left cheek. It seemed tender to the touch, so I figured he had an abscessed tooth. I couldn\u2019t get him to the vet the next day, but went in the day after that, and by the time I rolled into that stinky place that echoed with barks and meows, the lump had nearly tripled in size.<\/p>\n
The vet poked around, aspirated it, poked around some more.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think it\u2019s a tumor.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSeriously?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah. I\u2019ve never seen such a thing, but when I aspirated it, nothing came out, which tells me it\u2019s not a cyst. And it seems to be very attached to his jaw.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re sure it\u2019s not an abscessed tooth?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, his teeth look okay. To be certain, I need to run some x-rays, which will cost you $190.\u201d<\/p>\n
I gulped and asked what the protocol was if the x-ray showed a tumor.<\/p>\n
\u201cExtensive surgery. He may or may not survive, as bunnies are the most prone of all animals to die under anesthesia.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo we\u2019re talking thousands of dollars, with no guarantee of survival, and every possibility of death.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cRight.\u201d<\/p>\n
I loved Hops, y\u2019all. But I don\u2019t have that big of a wad. I don\u2019t even have that kind of cash for my own medical bills. So, I went home, Hops in tow, and told the vet I\u2019d consult my family and be back if I decided putting him down was the way to go. But I knew in my heart of hearts Hops was terminal. I didn\u2019t have the money to save him, and I can\u2019t stand it when an animal is in pain. Truth was, I needed a night to just get used to the idea of life with only one bunny. He was still eating okay, although the vet had no idea how. But he was quickly becoming emaciated and sickly looking, and that wicked lump of out of control cells would not let up. The tumor was growing exponentially every day, as was Hops\u2019 pain.<\/p>\n
The vet\u2019s words kept ringing in my head \u2026<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve never seen such a thing. He either broke his jaw, and a tumor resulted. Or he grew a tumor and broke his jaw.\u201d<\/p>\n
Never seen such a thing \u2026<\/em><\/p>\nNever seen such a thing \u2026<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\nWhere had I heard that before?<\/p>\n
Oh, yes. At my own doctor appointments. Many of them.<\/p>\n
What? One medical mystery begets another medical mystery? Is that it?\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\nThe last few weeks, I\u2019ve been working on refinishing a table. Meaning, I\u2019m slapping some Annie Sloan paint on it, aging it, and smearing some wax on top to see what happens. When I first started painting, a cracked look came through. I quickly took a picture and texted it to a chalk paint specialist who also happens to be my Pastor\u2019s wife, and asked, \u201cWhat is going on here!?\u201d<\/p>\n
She said, \u201cI don\u2019t know, but that looks great! Many painters come in the shop to take an advanced painting class in the hopes of getting that exact look!\u201d<\/p>\n
She also said something about me always being a \u201cspecial case\u201d, referring to my medical problems, I think. To which I replied, \u201cBut \u2026 even in my painting<\/em>!?\u201d<\/p>\nI\u2019m sorry, Hops. I didn\u2019t mean for you to be a \u201cspecial case.\u201d If you broke your jaw, I don\u2019t know how you would\u2019ve done it. If you grew a tumor, I don\u2019t know why. I just know that you were a great friend while I had you. I appreciated the toned down snuggles you gave (compared to Calvin\u2019s spastic clawing). I liked that you were melancholy because misery loves company. And I liked the way you let the grandbabies pet you, poke you in the eyes, and try to shove carrots up your nostril, thinking it was your mouth. You didn\u2019t even like carrots, which was weird. But you\u2019d nibble a little for the kids\u2019 entertainment. You did, however, love bell peppers, and I\u2019ll never forget the time you shared one with grandbabies T and A. They\u2019d feed you a bite, then take a bite of their own \u2026 until I realized what they were doing and told them it was gross. I mean I loved you and all, but food sharing with humans is where I draw the line.<\/p>\n
Also, I\u2019m thankful you weren\u2019t a girl. That time I caught you and Calvin doing the humpty dumpty dance in my front yard, I was seriously scared we had mislabeled your sex, and that I was in for a slew of baby bunnies. Turns out, bunnies are just weird and like to practice \u201cdancing\u201d on anything that might provide some \u2026 pleasure or babies or maybe just some entertainment.<\/p>\n
Ahem.<\/em><\/p>\nI\u2019m reading Where The Red Fern Grows,<\/em> because I am ashamed at how many classics I haven\u2019t read, and because when I was a small girl, Red Fern was the first movie I ever saw in a theater. It had to force myself to stay in my seat until the end. The painfully sad story got the best of me, and I made myself sick by choking down tears for an hour and a half. When I got home, I bawled my eyes out and was depressed for a week. And so, I guess I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. Was I just an overly sensitive child? Or is the story legitimately emotionally catastrophic? I\u2019m half way through, so I don\u2019t which one it is yet. But I find it odd that I lose a pet whilst reading about a boy who loses his pets.<\/p>\nRed Fern is awful, by today\u2019s political correctness standards. It\u2019s also theologically awful, but that\u2019s for another day. Point is, animals were looked at differently when the book was written. As if they were under our dominion, and not on the same level as humans. I am never for the abuse of animals. Neither am I for the equalization of animals to humans. In other words, if my baby had a tumor on his jaw that was going to spread and slowly kill him, I\u2019d go into debt to pay for the surgery, no matter what the risk was. Human life is valuable. Animal life is valuable. But not in the same way. At all.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve wondered if all bunnies go to Heaven. I heard one guy (don\u2019t remember who) say that our pets will be in the Celestial City if we want them to be<\/em>. Interesting thought, but I have no idea where he gets his information. Still, I\u2019d be pleasantly surprised to find Hops when I cross the threshold of my \u201cmansion.\u201d It\u2019d be fun to dash around the golden streets leaving fluffs of fur and little round poop pebbles withersoever we go (both from Hops, not me). Maybe in Heaven, Hops would talk, which would make for some very interesting table conversation. Perhaps he could tell me how he broke his jaw. If he broke his jaw. And why he didn\u2019t like carrots like every other bunny in the history of bunnies.<\/p>\nHe was a strange fella. And he will always be welcome in my \u201cmansion.\u201d In the meantime, rest in peace, Hops. Thanks for the cuddles. The entertainment. And life lessons.<\/p>\n
You served your purpose well.<\/p>\n
Sniff, sniff.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\u00a0 Remember when I adopted Calvin and Hops? Well there\u2019s a funny story as to which one got named Hops and which one got named Calvin. They\u2019re twins, see, especially in appearances. So I decided to mark Calvin\u2019s ear with a Sharpie dot so I could tell them apart. When I went into the house […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2920,"featured_media":1083,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[211,35,212,133],"class_list":["post-1273","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-childhood-stories","tag-grief","tag-obituaries","tag-pets"],"yoast_head":"\n
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