why it\u2019s so easy for Christians to get a divorce<\/em>. It\u2019s something I\u2019ve been thinking about, and Piper\u2019s public farewelling of a secular sandwich maker just reminded me about our culpability on this issue.<\/p>\nThere are a lot of statistics out there on divorce. I\u2019ve seen some that show Christians get divorced at higher rates than people of other faith or no faith, and I\u2019ve seen some which show the opposite. That\u2019s the frustrating thing about statistics\u2013 they don\u2019t always express the full truth or give one a legitimate picture of a given scenario, and one can often find statistics on the same issue but that draw opposite conclusions.<\/p>\n
In this case, the statistics aren\u2019t really relevant to my point. Today I simply want to talk about why it\u2019s so easy for Christians to get a divorce. And, in full disclosure, I write about the subject with my own broken history on the matter.<\/p>\n
I think one of the root causes of Christians divorcing is something completely outside of any factor previously considered. I think it\u2019s something outside of infidelity, something outside of irreconcilable differences, and something much closer to our \u201cspiritual home\u201d.<\/p>\n
The reason why it becomes so easy for far too many Christians to get a divorce is actually Christian culture itself\u2013 and John Piper\u2019s trend of farewelling people (now businesses) he disagrees with reminds me of this point. Let me explain:<\/p>\n
Piper\u2019s public behavior reveals something far deeper and more troubling about Christian culture; it reveals how quickly we are to sever relationships with one another. Just look at how Christianity is structured: denominationalism. While I appreciate the rich heritage and diverse thought we have due in part to denominations\/Christian traditions, they\u2019re all rooted historically in one thing: broken relationships. Even within those denominations we find further sub-sets of denomination, all rooted in broken relationship as well (this is precisely why we have about ten thousand different flavors of Baptist, my originating tradition). Have two people or two Christian groups who don\u2019t see eye-to-eye on 100% of the issues, all of the time? Fine, we\u2019ll just leave and go start our own group and call it something else.<\/p>\n
Have a person or a few people within that new group who don\u2019t agree on everything? Just publicly farewell them, socially ostracize them, or find a reason to place them under \u201cChurch discipline\u201d and the problem is solved.<\/p>\n
We have all sorts of creative and \u201cgodly\u201d ways to break relationships with people who disagree, even people who just disagree part of the time. Personally, I think as Christians we\u2019re actually addicted to breaking relationships to the point where it has become second nature to us.<\/p>\n
\u201cWait a minute\u2026 you believe that the rapture comes during the tribulation and not before it? Wow, I guess we should just go our own separate ways.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\nThis is something I know a little too well. While Piper hasn\u2019t tweeted me farewell, plenty of people in my real life have done it in more subtle ways. Since I accidentally became a public voice for disaffected evangelicals, the loss of real-life friends has been one of the more painful consequences I\u2019ve been thrust into experiencing. Sure, the blogging and book deals are nice, but just know that I\u2019ve paid a high price for all of it. I\u2019ve even had a friend confess that they\u2019ve been questioned by others as to why they\u2019re still friends with me.\u00a0<\/em>And, just as I was writing this piece, some \u201cpro-life\u201d Christians on twitter said they were blocking me because my piece yesterday was clearly a desire to \u201cjustify my support of killing babies\u201d.<\/p>\nI\u2019m a Mennonite baby killer now\u2026 whatever.<\/p>\n
And this is why it is so easy for Christians to get divorced: we do life in a culture that often thrives via a cycle of broken relationships instead of being built upon a dedication to peace making.<\/p>\n
While the Burger King issue isn\u2019t the real issue, and I think consumers are free to spend their money wherever they want, it does at least point<\/em> to the real issue: we\u2019re faster to say \u2018farewell\u2019 than we are to say \u2018let\u2019s share a meal and talk\u2019<\/em>.<\/strong><\/p>\nAnd, I\u2019ve got to be honest, I\u2019m realllly tired of people farewelling other Christians. I\u2019m tired of Piper doing it, and I\u2019m tired of Progressives doing it. Every time we do this it simply continues the cycle of reinforcing that broken relationships, opposed to nonviolent peacemaking, is the correct path for a Jesus follower.<\/p>\n
Well, it\u2019s not. <\/strong><\/p>\nIt might be the path of least resistance, the path of least conflict, and the easier road to travel, but it\u2019s not the path that Jesus has invited us to walk on. Certainly, it\u2019s not where one will find him<\/em>.
\n<\/strong><\/p>\nThe question then becomes: how the hell do we expect two people to hold it together and not quit\u2013 two people in the most stressful and complex of all human relationships\u2013 when we as a Christian culture are so busy flipping each other the spiritual bird that has become saying \u201cfarewell\u201d?<\/p>\n
Until we reject a Christian culture that functionally places a high spiritual value on breaking relationships, even considering it spiritually mature to break relationships, we shouldn\u2019t be all shocked and disgusted when married couples within such a culture, break that<\/em> relationship too.<\/p>\nThey\u2019re just following our example. Who could blame them?<\/p>\n
May we, the people of Jesus, reject this faux spiritual nonsense of saying \u201cfarewell\u201d to one another, regardless of our preferred method of saying it<\/em>. Instead, may we choose the path less traveled\u2013 the path of peacemaking\u2013 that we might become the people known by their refusal to break relationships.<\/p>\n\n<\/p><\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
John Piper is \u201cfarewelling\u201d again. No, this time it has nothing to do with Rob Bell\u2013 he\u2019s actually farewelled Burger King. (Though he changed the Bell trademark to \u201cGood-bye\u201d). Burger King recently announced a new LGBT pride wrapper for their sandwiches in some markets. The move had created a little stir around the internet, but […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1638,"featured_media":8522,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[386,388,387,316],"class_list":["post-8517","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-christian-culture","tag-divoce","tag-farewell","tag-john-piper","tag-marriage"],"yoast_head":"\n
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<\/a><\/p>\n