{"id":9398,"date":"2014-09-24T07:29:04","date_gmt":"2014-09-24T12:29:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/formerlyfundie\/?p=9398"},"modified":"2014-09-24T07:29:04","modified_gmt":"2014-09-24T12:29:04","slug":"suicide-prevention-its-time-for-the-church-to-get-serious","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/formerlyfundie\/suicide-prevention-its-time-for-the-church-to-get-serious\/","title":{"rendered":"Suicide Prevention: It’s Time For The Church To Get Serious"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"Helping<\/a>I wear a lot of labels in life\u2013 or perhaps from a different vantage point, I could say that people call me a lot of things.<\/em><\/p>\n

Whatever these labels I wear, whatever these words assigned to me, there is one label among them which I hate with every fiber of my being: suicide survivor.<\/p>\n

I hate it, because it\u2019s the one label that I didn\u2019t have a hand in choosing. I get to wear the Anabaptist label because that\u2019s my faith tradition\u2013 I chose that label, and can take it off any time I want.<\/p>\n

But suicide survivor? I didn\u2019t pick that one, and no matter what I do, there\u2019s nothing I can do to run away from it other than denying my own life experience. I\u2019ve briefly referenced it in the past without details\u2013 and don\u2019t feel emotionally up to telling my story\u2013 but in short, I lost my paternal grandfather to suicide when I was 17 (he had just turned 70). I had lived on our family farm with he and my grandmother for many years as a child after my parents divorced, and he and I were close. It still ranks #1 on my \u201cmost painful experiences\u201d list, even after all these years. (I later struggled with suicidal behavior myself, a story I told here on the blog<\/a>).<\/p>\n

As such, I\u2019ve always been passionate about suicide prevention having lived the painful aftermath of suicide myself, as well as someone who has come close to taking my own life. For something so painful, so tragic, something that wounds so deeply, it is actually something that is often quite preventable\u2013 if we have the right tools.<\/p>\n

For all the talk we Anabaptist do on peacemaking and nonviolence, I think we\u2019re missing an opportunity to expand what peacemaking (and teaching others how to make peace) can look like in a tangible way. Suicide remains a leading cause of death in the United States\u2013 more than killed by homicide, more than killed by war, and is not some distant issue. Real people are dying right around us, and we have an opportunity to be peacemakers in order to prevent more deaths from occurring.<\/p>\n

And so, make peace we must.<\/p>\n

Churches today are too often ill-equipped to prevent suicide or guide a faith community in a healing process after a suicide has occurred\u2013 and I say that as both a pastor and seminarian. In seven years of seminary, I\u2019ve had a total of one<\/em> conversation with a faculty member on the issue of suicide. As a pastor and former lay leader, I\u2019ve also seen churches completely undereducated and oblivious to the real opportunity to prevent death and help people find peace. As a faith community (meaning big \u201cC\u201d church) we simply haven\u2019t valued making suicide prevention a priority.<\/p>\n

We have failed to be peacemakers in one of the areas where we can actually have a real, tangible, and immediate impact for peace within the lives of people we know and love. This, along with 82,934 other things I\u2019ve compiled, must change. But this first\u2013 this is priority<\/em>. Lives are actually at stake, and lives can actually be saved.<\/p>\n

This week I\u2019m participating in the Patheos Book Club, and have been reading Dr. Karen Mason\u2019s new book, Preventing Suicide: A Handbook for Pastors, Chaplains, and Pastoral Counselors. <\/em>In the book, Dr. Mason notes that 1\/3rd of all pastors will experience a suicide in their congregation\u2013 a serious number to consider, along with the many other helpful statistics found in the book. As I read the book, my heart broke as I realized how many lives could potentially be saved if we would make this a priority in the Church.<\/p>\n

Beyond geographic lines, beyond denominational lines, we must<\/em> make this a priority\u2013 and we must do it together.<\/p>\n

Dr. Mason\u2019s book is the most comprehensive book I\u2019ve read on this subject (and I have actually read quite a few), and she handles a difficult subject in a way that compliments both faith and<\/em> psychology instead of a one-or-the-other approach. She covers everything from suicide warning signs to dispelling myths about suicide, to a survey of different Christian theological stances on the issue. This is a book that should be mandatory reading for anyone<\/em> working not just in a church, but anyone working with people.<\/em><\/p>\n

What I found most practical however, was her call for us to train our church leaders. There are many different suicide prevention training programs that are readily available for your congregation (many are listed in the book), and we must capitalize on this opportunity to equip ourselves to save lives. And we must do it quickly.<\/p>\n

If we\u2019ll throw thousands of dollars into a sound system, and millions into a building, but set aside no time or money to train people to save lives, <\/em>well, I think that would mean we stopped being the people of Jesus.<\/strong><\/p>\n

This is an issue where those of us from across the spectrum should be united (and repentant): we Anabaptists will quickly protest the latest death from war or execution, Evangelicals are quick to protest any relaxing of abortion laws citing \u201csanctity of life\u201d, and everyone in between has their own issues around death that they\u2019re quick to protest.<\/p>\n

But what about the people dying in our own churches? How are we actually peacemakers if we\u2019re not actively, proactively, helping these seemingly invisible people make peace and choose life?<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what I think we can do immediately:<\/p>\n

1. Preventing Suicide<\/em><\/a> is a must-read. If you\u2019re a church leader, please get this book and carefully read it.<\/p>\n

2. Consider purchasing this book as a gift for your pastor, and use it as an opportunity to discuss the seriousness of this issue with them.<\/p>\n

3. At your next church business meeting, take a stand on this issue. Demand that your church set aside funds to train and equip the congregation (not just the pastor) to prevent suicide. Don\u2019t take no for an answer\u2013 if a church isn\u2019t interested in potentially saving lives in the congregation but is interested in building campaigns, I can say this with confidence: move the heck on<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

4. Use this as an opportunity to show unity with other churches in your area\u2013 host the training, and invite other congregations\/denominations to come and participate in the training.<\/p>\n

5. Finally, don\u2019t just ignore this issue\/post because you don\u2019t think it applies to you: trust me, suicide knows no boundaries. You don\u2019t need to be a church leader to get educated on preventing suicide\u2013 this is something that everyone<\/em> should do. Get educated. Read up. Dispel some myths. Be committed to being a peacemaker in the lives around you.<\/p>\n

We can do better than we\u2019ve done in the past. The Church has historically failed on this issue, but it doesn\u2019t always have to be this way\u2013 you and I can usher in a new era where we take suicide seriously, where we educate ourselves, and where we commit to being peacemakers right here, right now.<\/p>\n

\u2026<\/p>\n

* I was generously given a copy of Preventing Suicide: A Handbook for Pastors, Chaplains and Pastoral Counselors<\/em> free of charge from the publisher, and was under no obligation to favorably review or endorse the book.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

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