{"id":4380,"date":"2018-10-23T08:03:54","date_gmt":"2018-10-23T12:03:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/gloryseed\/?p=4380"},"modified":"2018-10-23T08:13:44","modified_gmt":"2018-10-23T12:13:44","slug":"advice-for-a-single-woman-who-is-looking-for-a-masculine-man","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/gloryseed\/2018\/10\/advice-for-a-single-woman-who-is-looking-for-a-masculine-man\/","title":{"rendered":"Advice for a Single Woman Who Is Looking for a Masculine Man"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I have known a number of unhappy single Christian women over the years. Many of them are at a loss. Why can\u2019t they find a man who will take a healthy interest in them?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

In my experience the women I\u2019m thinking about don\u2019t understand men, and they tend to be surprisingly uninterested in learning about them.<\/p>\n

I have my suspicions as to why some of these women lack interest in learning about what makes men tick, but I won\u2019t spend time here discussing those suspicions. Instead I\u2019m going to give some advice to women who have \u201cears to hear\u201d.<\/p>\n

Here goes.<\/p>\n

1. Get into the right pond.<\/strong><\/p>\n

What\u2019s the right pond? Too many women are in ponds that are primarily filled with women like themselves. They don\u2019t seem to understand that they need to get into another pond in order to meet masculine men.<\/p>\n

Generally these women work in the cubicle farms of large corporations, or in healthcare, or education. And just as generally, the few masculine men you find in those places are already taken. The other men are either in much demand, or they are practically worthless. You must find a pond filled with masculine men. (And no, it is not a singles-bar; or the singles-group at the mega-church\u2013in those places you find either the predator or the Christian version of guy you\u2019re not interested in.)<\/p>\n

I recently told a young woman who was heading off to college, \u201cGo ahead and join the Jane Austen Fan Club, but don\u2019t expect to find many men in it.\u201d Since she is gifted in math I told her, \u201cJoin the physics club, too. You\u2019re more likely to meet men there.\u201d<\/p>\n

This is what I mean by getting into the right pond.<\/p>\n

2. Learn to drop the hanky in the right place.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Learn to drop the hanky. Feminism is all about not needing men. (It is an illusion, but let\u2019s just run with it for a moment.) Often career minded women will say to themselves, \u201cThe reason men don\u2019t ask me out is because they are intimidated.\u201d<\/em> Wrong. The reason is masculine men don\u2019t find you attractive\u2013and I\u2019m not talking about physically attractive.<\/p>\n

A masculine man often has a surplus of ability when it comes to traditionally masculine arts. A single man who is masculine has no place to invest the surplus. When a woman sends the message\u2013\u201cI don\u2019t need what you\u2019re offering, I can do everything for myself,\u201d<\/em> he is turned off. He moves on.<\/p>\n

A traditional woman knows that a household is a place for interdependence, not independence. She knows how to receive a man\u2019s gifts. And one of the ways to signal that is by asking for help. Everyone likes to be needed\u2013and this is true for masculine men.<\/p>\n

\n

3. Give as well as get.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Learn to give as well as get. A masculine man is not looking for \u201cone of the guys\u201d to marry. He\u2019s not interested in competing with his wife.<\/p>\n

He\u2019s looking for a woman to bring into his life things he can\u2019t do for himself. A traditional woman gives him things that make his life richer and more complete. Generally he will be at a loss for words to express his gratitude\u2013he\u2019ll often express it by giving things that come from his strengths.<\/p>\n

A healthy masculine man doesn\u2019t receive a woman\u2019s gifts as a put down. Instead he is grateful (if he is virtuous), and he feels appreciated.<\/p>\n

4. Don\u2019t wait.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t wait. Here\u2019s the reality: the marriage prospects get better for men as they age, the reverse is true for women.<\/p>\n

Is it fair? Who cares. It is a fact. Deal with it.<\/p>\n

I see women put things off because they\u2019ve bought the feminist narrative about success and so forth. Then they\u2019re single and childless at 35. They live in a nice apartment with their cats, they drive a nice car, they have a middle-management position in some bureaucracy that could replace them in the blink of an eye. And they\u2019re miserable.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t wait.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I have known a number of unhappy single Christian women over the years. Many of them are at a loss. Why can\u2019t they find a man who will take a healthy interest in them? In my experience the women I\u2019m thinking about don\u2019t understand men, and they tend to be surprisingly uninterested in learning about […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2522,"featured_media":2327,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37,11,299,355],"tags":[435],"class_list":["post-4380","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-happiness","category-household-economy","category-theology-of-the-family","category-tradition","tag-advice-for-single-women-looking-for-a-man"],"yoast_head":"\nAdvice for a Single Woman Who Is Looking for a Masculine Man<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I have known a number of unhappy single Christian women over the years. Many of them are at a loss. 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