\nYes I know not all Christians hate \u201cthe gays\u201d. But that\u2019s the point. Generalisations are often what we cling to when we let our labels define us.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n
![\"Witches](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/690\/2016\/07\/witch-cauldron-pixabay.jpg\")
Once you reach that point, where you ask yourself what to believe based on your label rather than your inner self, that\u2019s when you know something is wrong and you need to make a change. It\u2019s not that anything is wrong with the label, labels are words that we choose. No, something is wrong with how you are using your label.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s not a big horrible thing. Many of us end up doing it at some point, I have done it a few times. Simple example, striving so very very hard to celebrate or observe the Pagan Sabbats because, \u201cthat\u2019s what Pagans do\u201d is just one example of how I was using my labels wrong \u2013 I couldn\u2019t make the cross-quarters work, at all, ever. In the end I realised I shouldn\u2019t be trying so hard, or indeed at all. Just because these festivals are important to a lot of Pagans, doesn\u2019t mean they have to matter to me. Trying to force them to work because my label said I should make them work, was simply the wrong thing to do. Once I let go of this need that wasn\u2019t a need, my life got a bit easier, a weight was lifted from my shoulders and honestly, I found myself happier in my religion than before. I didn\u2019t even notice it before, that trying so hard to do what I shouldn\u2019t be doing was making me almost hate my religion.<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t need to change my label to escape that particular problem, the label wasn\u2019t the problem, my perception of what the label meant was the problem in that instance. But sometimes what needs to change is not your behaviour, but the label you use.<\/p>\n
When I first discovered Paganism as an early teen, I discovered it through an Aussie Witchcraft Magazine. It, and the few books I managed to get hold of over the next year or two, were, well let\u2019s just say that I understand why so many people think Wicca and Witchcraft are synonyms. Because I thought so too, because of that magazine and those few books. At my first look through the magazine I had finally discovered a modern belief system that seemed to match my need to work with the Gods, the Greek Gods in my case. The magazine would discuss Greek myth occasionally, as well as other myths and Gods, and I thought, here it is! This is what I have been looking for.<\/p>\n
And then I kept reading, more magazines, those few books and, being the na\u00efve teenager who finally found the holy grail, I tried so very hard to follow the rules. The magazines and books were full of generic Paganism, but they were also full of generic Wicca \u2013 rules and lores that had to be followed to be Pagan and Witch. The Triple Goddess, Harm None, Threefold Return etc. I tried so very hard. It took a while before I threw my hands in the air and gave up, realising, this was not me, these things did not fit me, I could not follow these damnable rules. They were wrong! It was all wrong!<\/p>\n I abandoned my labels of (newbie) witch and Wiccan. Not that I should have used Wiccan anyway, but I never knew that back then. I felt like I had lost something major, some part of myself. I had been clinging so desperately to those labels, that when I finally realised I couldn\u2019t change myself to fit them, it broke me a little. I felt adrift and alone, lost. Searching again. Because at this point, I also thought, you had to follow those rules to be Pagan.<\/p>\n This was a case where I needed to change my labels \u2013 not only because I was using the wrong labels, but also because I had little true understanding of what the labels really meant. Even when I did learn the truth of things, the labels were still important to me and how they made me feel \u2013 so important that I refused to use the label of Witch for years to come, despite being a Witch.<\/p>\n In the first example I didn\u2019t need to change my label, just my behaviour and it was a freeing experience. But in the second example the need to change my label was painful. This is because in the second example I was very attached to the label, and what it meant, so\u00a0it was painful to let go of it. But in the end it turned out to be a good thing, I think my life would have been quite miserable to live a lie long term.<\/p>\n Of course this isn\u2019t really about the labels, so much as it is about what the labels represent. We aren\u2019t necessarily attached the labels, the terms and titles \u2013 we are attached to what they mean, to us and to others. Labels represent ideas and beliefs, and in some cases community and kindred spirits. Letting go of that can be hard and painful. We can become so blinded by what we like about a thing, we can\u2019t see it when we shouldn\u2019t be part of it.<\/p>\n Then at some point it really does become about the labels. Suddenly, if you don\u2019t fit the label, you cannot claim the label and you must therefore lose every part of that label. If you cannot believe in the rule of Harm None, you cannot be Wiccan and you must lose everything that made you part of Wicca \u2013 friends, teachers, even other beliefs.<\/p>\n Reality doesn\u2019t work that way of course, but fear blinds us to reality just as much as the idea of finally finding a home can.<\/p>\n It\u2019s not about the labels, and yet it is all about the labels.<\/p>\n![\"Goddess](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/690\/2016\/07\/pagan-altar-1034856_960_720.jpg\")