{"id":2555,"date":"2013-03-01T13:31:33","date_gmt":"2013-03-01T20:31:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/?p=2555"},"modified":"2013-03-01T13:37:29","modified_gmt":"2013-03-01T20:37:29","slug":"the-secret-password","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2013\/03\/the-secret-password\/","title":{"rendered":"The Secret Password"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

Time for Lenten weeping and gnashing of teeth. We progressive\/mainline protestant types aren\u2019t into the whole sackcloth thing, but a sound \u2018mea culpa\u2019 from time to time can be good for the soul. And this week, I\u2019ve got one for us all. Repeat after me:<\/p>\n

\u201cI am selfish.\u201d<\/p>\n

The other day,\u00a0a\u00a0friend posted on Facebook that, while she does not consider herself a religious person, she has been asking frequent prayer for a child in her family who is ill. Her question to her\u00a0Christian friends: \u201cDoes God mind that I\u2019m asking for something when I\u2019m not actually giving anything back?\u201d<\/p>\n

Does God mind?\u2026<\/em> More later on my response. First, I have to ask\u2026what have we done? What have we,\u00a0followers\u00a0of Jesus, done to make people feel they have no access to God without going through us?<\/p>\n

Maybe it is what we have not done. For years, we progressive Christian types have been so dang polite\u2026we don\u2019t want to be confused with those <\/em>types of Christians who knock on your door, ask if you\u2019ve found Jesus, and proceed to pronounce judgement on your life. We don\u2019t want to be those <\/em>types of Christians, with a three-point answer for the world\u2019s every ill. We don\u2019t want to make our atheist and agnostic friends uncomfortable by talking about Jesus at happy hour, and so we say\u2026well, nothing. We say nothing. We miss simple opportunities to share our faith and invite others to explore it. In the effort to define what faith is NOT, we fail miserably at\u00a0sharing what faith IS.<\/p>\n

Beyond sins of omission, our faith communities contain a thousand little messages that say, this is ours. <\/em>We talk hospitality and outreach, but everything about our structure, language, and buildings sends the same signal\u2013 \u2018we\u2019ve got something you want. And you can only get it by coming inside.\u2019<\/p>\n

Sure, invite folks to engage in community, to discover what inside experience makes faith meaningful for us. But \u2018inside\u2019 is a problematic word. In an effort to make Church look attractive and intriguing, we wind up making it a country club. Rather than conveying the intended\u00a0message of welcome, we\u00a0set up\u00a0Church as commodity. The result? People on the \u2018outside\u2019 wondering\u2013in a time of\u00a0great need or sadness\u2013wondering<\/em>\u00a0if they are allowed to talk to God without first coming through our doors and our new member class.<\/p>\n

The myth that Church owns God\u2019s direct line runs deep, and has been carefully put in place by the Church itself. If we\u2019re going to begin to dispel it, we\u2019ve got to dissect everything about our individual congregations and identify the points of aversion.<\/p>\n

1-V<\/strong>isit your church website<\/strong>. If you are saying, oh, we know\u2026we know it\u2019s bad, <\/em>then, for the love of God, fix it. It might be expensive, it might be hard work, it might bring up all sorts of tensions that you never knew lurked beneath the surface \u2026but it\u00a0must be done. The web is first point of contact for most church visitors. If you don\u2019t up the game on the website, you will never meet them in person.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t just look at the aesthetic. Think content\u2013is it full of insider language, like acronyms (DWM, CYF, AWANAS, etc) that will be Greek to an outsider? Is there a two-page church history that begins\u00a0\u201cIn 1843, our founders\u2026? Do you share a list of board members, who sits on committees, and when\u2019s the next budget meeting? If anything on that site\u00a0only makes sense to long-time members, it doesn\u2019t belong there. If EVERYthing on that site will only make sense to your long-time members\u2026well, then it is time to start looking at other parts of your community life. Is there ANYthing\u00a0that would be meaningful to a seeker, a stranger, an outsider? If so, put it on the dang website, and scrap the minutes from the building committee. (Apply same\u00a0criteria to any other \u2018outreach\u2019 material; brochures, signage, worship bulletin, etc).<\/p>\n

2-<\/strong>\u00a0Examine worship<\/strong>. Announcements, complicated rituals, insider language (acronyms), passing the plate with no meaningful insight as to what it\u2019s FOR (or passing the plate at all), prayer requests for the cousin\u2019s neighbor\u2019s kindergarten teacher, or an invitation to \u2018membership\u2019\u2026scrap it. Every minute of it screams, \u201cbecome a member and THEN we\u2019ll give you the password.\u201d<\/p>\n

3-<\/strong> What do we DO in church, anyway? Not just on Sundays, but during the week\u2026are there programs<\/strong>, beyond meetings and administrative stuff, that feed, nurture and\u00a0support? Opportunities for mission?\u00a0 <\/strong>Plenty of folks in our neighborhoods may never come seeking the decoder ring for worship, but they would love to serve with\u00a0us at the\u00a0food bank. Do we have ways of inviting them to do so?<\/p>\n

4- <\/strong>In everyday <\/strong>conversations,\u00a0social media posts, and beyond\u2013do we use language<\/strong> like \u2018nones<\/a>,\u2019 \u2018non-believers,\u2019 the \u2018unchurched,\u2019 or, Lord forgive us, \u2018the unsaved?\u2019\u00a0Do we complain about people who only come to church on Christmas and Easter? Do we lament\u00a0a \u2018War and Christmas,\u2019 and go about feeling persecuted by the diversification of America?<\/p>\n

Addressing these subtle messages of exclusion will only begin to\u00a0diminish the \u2018insider\/outsider\u2019\u00a0image of church. But the amazing thing is, once we begin, we are not only better equipped to connect with those \u2018outsiders\u2019 we\u2019ve created\u2026 We might also find\u2013 within our churches and our very own selves\u2013a letting go of miraculous proportion. In this newly created space for others, our own limited perceptions of the Holy can take on a new dimension.<\/p>\n

To my friend\u2013and to all\u00a0who think we are hiding the password\u2013I can only say this: I\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m sorry that we\u2019ve done such a\u00a0rotten job of making faith inviting and accessible. And does God mind<\/em>\u00a0?\u00a0 <\/em>Sister, God cannot wait to hear from you. We were born for this. We were made for this. The Church does not always get it right. We get awfully busy talking about pledge cards and meetings and paint colors and membership luncheons\u2026and we forget to tell you, invite you, proclaim to you that WE\u2013all of us\u2013were born for this. <\/em>We were born to seek the holy, to know the One who made us. We were born to ask, in all hope and helplessness, for that which we need. We were born to witness the miracle that unfolds when we\u00a0take that first step of faith\u2013not into an institution, but toward the God of our being.<\/p>\n

All that said\u2013we do want you to come to church. We so want for church to be a place that facilitates this journey, rather than standing in your way. We so want to tell you what Jesus has to do with it, and we promise (well, some of us promise) that there will be no hell cartoons or three-point-salvation plans involved. Give us a chance to get over ourselves\u2013our own limited, selfish ideas of what\u00a0faith looks like\u2013and we will make a place for you at the table. In the meantime, please don\u2019t let our limitations\u00a0keep you from praying. God is waiting, with such anticipation, to hear from you.<\/p>\n

We were made for this. Thanks to my brave and honest friend for the reminder.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Time for Lenten weeping and gnashing of teeth. We progressive\/mainline protestant types aren\u2019t into the whole sackcloth thing, but a sound \u2018mea culpa\u2019 from time to time can be good for the soul. And this week, I\u2019ve got one for us all. Repeat after me: \u201cI am selfish.\u201d The other day,\u00a0a\u00a0friend posted on Facebook that, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1154,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[65,5,118],"tags":[82,9,10],"class_list":["post-2555","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-being-a-person","category-faith-and-community","category-lent-and-easter","tag-lent","tag-progressive-christianity","tag-spirituality"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Secret Password<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Time for Lenten weeping and gnashing of teeth. 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