{"id":4723,"date":"2017-01-26T19:47:34","date_gmt":"2017-01-27T02:47:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/?p=4723"},"modified":"2017-01-26T19:47:34","modified_gmt":"2017-01-27T02:47:34","slug":"4723","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/","title":{"rendered":"“This is Us,” and How Rape Culture Ruins Everything"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

Remember the good old days when people used to talk about TV shows they were watching? Fun times. How about a throw-back to the good old days\u2026<\/p>\n

And speaking of good old days, I love\u00a0This is Us<\/a>. <\/em>I love the flashbacks to the 80s, and the house that is full of things I had in my childhood home (I literally saw my parents\u2019 old bedspread on this week\u2019s episode.)\u00a0I love the occasional twists and turns that make you sit up on the edge of the couch and go \u201cWHAAAAA??? I did NOT see that coming!\u201d I love the whole premise of the thing. I love the way they deal with hard things that most cable network shows won\u2019t touch\u2013obesity, race, and homosexuality, for instance. Add in the beautiful sibling dynamics and the fact that Milo Ventimiglia frequently appears shirtless, and it is nearly the perfect show.<\/p>\n

But let\u2019s talk for a minute about rape culture.<\/p>\n

I know. I thought we were taking a break from the misogynistic horror show for a moment too, but alas, it follows us everywhere.<\/p>\n

Kind of like that creepy stable dude that follows Kate around her first day at weight loss camp. What. Is. That. Supposed to be??<\/p>\n

(Minor, very tiny) spoiler alert: In Season 1, Ep. 14., Kate goes to a camp that offers an \u201cimmersive\u201d weight loss experience. For a month. Right after she\u2019s gotten engaged to Toby (who did not die! Yay!) \u00a0When she gets there, the stable guy, who is out taking care of the horses, gives her an appraising glance. It is supposed to be flattering but, ew. He then gives her a compliment that feels a lot like a cat-call.<\/p>\n

Not much later,\u00a0he straight-up comes onto her. Says \u201cover there is my room, whenever you\u2019re ready.\u201d (Again we say: ew). Let\u2019s re-emphasize the fact that she barely knows this guy. And she just got engaged.<\/p>\n

She says no, not interested, unavailable, etc; and HE says\u2013wait for it\u2013\u201cyou don\u2019t know it yet, but this is happening.\u201d<\/p>\n

THIS IS HAPPENING.<\/em> And that is what we call rape culture.<\/p>\n

\"Maybe
Maybe she will use those bright green drumsticks to beat the stable boy\u2019s ass?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

This is a perfect example of how easily we normalize this kind of behavior. Granted, in this scene Kate\u00a0walked away. Still saying no, and shaking her head a little. Maybe she\u2019ll keep walking, and all will be well. But she was shaking her head in a way that implied she was intrigued. Maybe a little turned on. And so, we were left with the distinct impression that \u201cthis\u201d may, in fact, be \u201chappening\u201d with the horse guy in some later episode. And if it does\u2013if she does wind up cheating on or leaving Toby and hooking up with the smarmy horse dude? Then our nearly perfect show is reinforcing that dangerous notion that so many men secretly harbor:\u00a0that women don\u2019t really know what they want; that \u2018no\u2019 sometimes really means \u2018yes;\u2019 and that aggressive pursuit is always rewarded with sex, eventually.<\/p>\n

Again we say\u2026ew.<\/p>\n

Maybe the show will surprise me. They\u2019ve sure done it before. Maybe his role is, in fact, Creepy Stable Guy, and we will watch Kate have to deal with yet another intrusion on her weight loss journey. Or a big win in the self-esteem journey as she shuts down his advances. Maybe he gets fired for sexual harassment. I don\u2019t know. Any of that would work to redeem the show I love so well. But I can\u2019t help but feel we were just introduced to Kate\u2019s new love interest, in which case, I might be out.<\/p>\n

Y\u2019all send me some pics\u00a0of Milo, ok? Objectified in a completely non-predatory way, of course, because we would not want to perpetuate any double standards in the media.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Remember the good old days when people used to talk about TV shows they were watching? Fun times. How about a throw-back to the good old days\u2026 And speaking of good old days, I love\u00a0This is Us. I love the flashbacks to the 80s, and the house that is full of things I had in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1154,"featured_media":4724,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[734,1389,159,1104,9,1036,10,1388],"class_list":["post-4723","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-faith-in-culture","tag-faith-in-film","tag-feminism","tag-patriarchy","tag-progressive-christianity","tag-rape-culture","tag-spirituality","tag-this-is-us"],"yoast_head":"\n"This is Us," and How Rape Culture Ruins Everything<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Kate's new "love interest" on 'This is Us' just gave us a perfect example of how easily we normalize rape culture.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\""This is Us," and How Rape Culture Ruins Everything\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Kate's new "love interest" on 'This is Us' just gave us a perfect example of how easily we normalize rape culture.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Irreverin\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2017-01-27T02:47:34+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/333\/2017\/01\/kate-e1485484664952.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"400\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Erin Wathen\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Erin Wathen\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/\",\"name\":\"\\\"This is Us,\\\" and How Rape Culture Ruins Everything\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2017-01-27T02:47:34+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2017-01-27T02:47:34+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/#\/schema\/person\/d952aeacf2fb5d80629d6718167a6013\"},\"description\":\"Kate's new \\\"love interest\\\" on 'This is Us' just gave us a perfect example of how easily we normalize rape culture.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/2017\/01\/4723\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"“This is Us,” and How Rape Culture Ruins Everything\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/\",\"name\":\"Irreverin\",\"description\":\"Seeking the sacred in family, culture, politics, and sometimes, even ministry.\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/#\/schema\/person\/d952aeacf2fb5d80629d6718167a6013\",\"name\":\"Erin Wathen\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/irreverin\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/b74f7ca70483103d7b13738306adccf4?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/b74f7ca70483103d7b13738306adccf4?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Erin Wathen\"},\"description\":\"Rev. 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