Now, this is a bit of a flaky church \u2014 apparently conditioned by their applause for this speaker, the assembly then applauded the priest after the homily. \u00a0But here\u2019s the further information in their bulletin:<\/p>\n
New Ministry Coming Soon \u2013 THE DEAL<\/p>\n
(DIVORCE, EDUCATION, ADVOCACY, LITURGY)<\/p>\n
Divorce is difficult! \u00a0There so much to deal with. \u00a0You\u2019re a divorced Catholic, now what? \u00a0If you\u2019re facing divorce or already divorced, please join us for a wine and cheese reception to hear about this much needed ministry.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Now, one shouldn\u2019t read too much into this sort of thing, but this sure sounds indistinguishable from a divorced support group at the local Methodist church, where the focus is (I presume) on supporting each other through the legal process of divorce, and the long-term issues of shared custody, for instance, and ultimately beginning to date again, with the issues that creates for family life. \u00a0And if the \u201ceducation\u201d and \u201cadvocacy\u201d and \u201cliturgy\u201d means creating a false hope that remarriage afterwards is A-OK because any day now Pope Francis\u2019ll put his stamp of approval on it (or, worse, with respect to the \u201cL\u201d, \u201clet\u2019s celebrate mass and tell everyone they\u2019re fools if they don\u2019t troop up for communion\u201d), we\u2019ll that\u2019s all the more unfortunate.<\/p>\n
(* Snarky side comment: \u00a0heck, maybe we just revive polygamy to fix the issue! \u00a0One spouse you live with, and one that you don\u2019t.)<\/p>\n
But, really, I go back and forth on the issue. \u00a0There are many people who take it as a given that for pretty much any marriage that failed, grounds can always be found for an annulment, so that the easy-peasy solution is to just send everyone to the annulment tribunal, and help them get their paperwork in order, or perhaps encourage the idea of \u2014 oh, what was this called? the notion that, if you know in your heart that, even though you couldn\u2019t persuade the tribunal of it, you, or your ex-husband, really didn\u2019t take the commitment of marriage secretly, you decide for yourself that there really wasn\u2019t a valid marriage. \u00a0And it\u2019s clearly nonsensical to say that definitionally any marriage whatsoever \u00a0in which the couple divorced was doomed from the start, because one or the other party was clearly\u00a0too immature to make that commitment or else it would have lasted.<\/p>\n
But yet: \u00a0in the year 2015, even well-intentioned couples hear repeatedly, \u201cmarriage is a means of obtaining state benefits and social approval for your loving relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n
The default assumption in Catholic teaching on marriage is supposed to be, if I\u2019m not mistaken, that not just Catholics\u2019, but other Christians\u2019 marriages are sacramental if they meet the key requirements of proper intention (permanence, faithfulness, openness to children) and ability to truly make that commitment (sufficiently mature, mentally well, no coercion) \u2014 but (speaking without any knowledge of the annulment process) I would think that the large majority of American marriages are not sacramental any longer, insofar as the couples believe that divorce is a real possibility, and that whether to have children is a question to be decided entirely apart from getting married. \u00a0Marriage in the year 2025 may have removed even the aspect of faithfulness, based on the increasing number of positive stories (e.g., CNN) about open marriages which present the decision of whether to have sex exclusively with one\u2019s spouse as just that, a decision.<\/p>\n
And even with respect to Catholic marriages, against this, is pre-Cana really enough?<\/p>\n
Discuss among yourselves.<\/p>\n
(But \u2014 by the way: \u00a0you guys that are not Catholic, and not even Christian, are invited to share your comments, but please do so in a way that furthers the discussion, and don\u2019t justtoss out a statement like \u201cCatholic teaching is dumb and does nothing other than make people unhappy.\u201d)<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So last Sunday I went to church at the neighboring parish, since its mass times fit in better with the activities for the day, and we got there partway through a very earnest woman\u00a0announcing a new ministry. \u00a0Divorce is difficult, she said, and thoughts go through your mind: \u00a0excommunication? \u00a0Go to another church? \u00a0But what […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2209,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2353","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n
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