our friend Ray<\/a>\u00a0(yeah, my mom, who\u2019s never met him, said she got teary-eyed watching the linked video). \u00a0At his wife\u2019s request, my husband organized the Boy Scouts performing a flag ceremony with a special addition: \u00a0besides the usual recitation of the Scout Law (\u201cA Scout is kind, courteous, brave, cheerful, thrifty, reverent, etc.\u201d), they added, recited by all current and former Scouts, in a repeat-after-me fashion, \u201cRay was kind\u201d \u2013 \u201cRay was courteous\u201d etc.. \u00a0Then there was a brief prayer service, presided over by the priest who was at the Neuman Center when he was at college, with readings and a bit of a reflection, then an extended time of singing \u201cGather songs\u201d, since Ray and his college friends were all a part of the Neuman Center choir, and music was an important part of his life \u2014 interspersed with family and friends sharing memories of Ray.<\/p>\nMonday was the funeral. \u00a0The Boy Scouts came, in uniform, and served as ushers. \u00a0Many of Ray\u2019s children\u2019s classmates (since we\u2019re talking about a parochial school) were there as well. \u00a0And, rather than a cantor, there was a full choir composed of university friends and others. \u00a0And there were 6 priests concelebrating \u2014 the priest from the wake, another friend who was a student along with Ray and entered the priesthood afterwards, the two priests and retired priest from church, and a priest from the neighboring parish where Ray attended before moving. \u00a0This was followed, of course, by the burial at the cemetery, and then a meal at the Knights of Columbus hall.<\/p>\n
Tuesday was wake #2, for the husband of one of the other Scoutmasters (yes, a mother \u2014 this is a Catholic parish, we don\u2019t do the \u201ctwo dads\u201d thing here). \u00a0Yes, last Saturday at church, I was expecting the prayers to include a mention of Ray, but my jaw (figuratively) dropped when I heard his name. \u00a0Not quite as young as Ray \u2014 49 rather than 43, but still too young, and his youngest child is in my 7th grader\u2019s class. \u00a0I\u2019d never met him, and my husband, who had, was out of town, having left that morning, so I packed up the kids for a quick trip to the funeral home to offer our condolences to Donna.<\/p>\n
Wednesday was funeral #2; this time I was the only one from the family there. \u00a0Many of my son\u2019s classmates were there, but I didn\u2019t push my son, who had had enough of wakes and funerals. \u00a0(Besides which, another classmate\u2019s father died last year \u2014 again, a young father with four children, 6th grade and younger \u2014 and that was also the year when his 2nd grade teacher died.) \u00a0Not having met Tom, I felt a bit more detached, observing details like the fact that the priest had the gospel (\u201cI am the resurrection\u201d) pretty much memorized, and that he made sure to add commentary for visitors\/non-churchgoers, such as \u201cnow we\u2019ll listen to a reading from the New Testament\u201d, and I was also surprised at the fact that the homily was not, as I had understood to be the case, generic preaching about death and resurrection, but a lot more eulogy-like. \u00a0Tom had also been in the army, so after the service ended, at the entrance to the church, soldiers (or vets?) in dress uniform ceremoniously gave Donna the flag that had been on the casket and played taps.<\/p>\n
And Thursday was the school band concert, the reminder that life goes on. \u00a0This year, they rearranged the music program, so the third graders are learning recorder from the band (now also part-time general music) teacher, which meant that both my 3rd and 7th grader played in the concert. \u00a0Of course, even then, Laura (last year\u2019s new widow) and Betsy (Ray\u2019s wife) were there; and Donna\u2019s daughter was probably in the band, too. \u00a0Afterwards, I gave my mom an overdue check-in phone call, and got the good news that Dad is going to be discharged from the rehab place the day before Thanksgiving \u2014 not that that solves anything, as there\u2019s still no semblance of a plan in place for the future.<\/p>\n
Now it\u2019s Friday. \u00a0There\u2019s a snowstorm outside, and the kids are squabbling about what to watch on TV, and I\u2019m this close to sending them all up to bed early. The kitchen is a mess, and there\u2019s a big pile of laundry, and I never did bake anything for the bake sale tomorrow, and, besides that, there\u2019s a couple hours of work that I didn\u2019t finish up yet.<\/p>\n
Long week.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Wake, funeral, wake, funeral, band concert. \u00a0That\u2019s been my week. Well, of course, this doesn\u2019t tell the whole story. Sunday was the wake for our friend Ray\u00a0(yeah, my mom, who\u2019s never met him, said she got teary-eyed watching the linked video). \u00a0At his wife\u2019s request, my husband organized the Boy Scouts performing a flag ceremony […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2209,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3278","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n
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