Broke With Envy<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"On Real Clear Books today, I linked to Jessa Crispin's latest literary advice column, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Broke With Envy\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"On Real Clear Books today, I linked to Jessa Crispin's latest literary advice column, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Jeremy Lott's Diary\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-06-14T14:20:36+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-06-14T16:04:37+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Jeremy Lott\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Jeremy Lott\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/\",\"name\":\"Broke With Envy\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2012-06-14T14:20:36+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2012-06-14T16:04:37+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#\/schema\/person\/6c759d696b2f864e0678fac4bf4e792d\"},\"description\":\"On Real Clear Books today, I linked to Jessa Crispin's latest literary advice column, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Broke With Envy\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/\",\"name\":\"Jeremy Lott's Diary\",\"description\":\"An insider's look at religion news and commentary\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#\/schema\/person\/6c759d696b2f864e0678fac4bf4e792d\",\"name\":\"Jeremy Lott\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ffd29bbac59597c87f9338596cbf8921?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ffd29bbac59597c87f9338596cbf8921?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Jeremy Lott\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/author\/jlott\/\"}]}<\/script>\n","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Broke With Envy","description":"On Real Clear Books today, I linked to Jessa Crispin's latest literary advice column, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Broke With Envy","og_description":"On Real Clear Books today, I linked to Jessa Crispin's latest literary advice column, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a","og_url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/","og_site_name":"Jeremy Lott's Diary","article_published_time":"2012-06-14T14:20:36+00:00","article_modified_time":"2012-06-14T16:04:37+00:00","author":"Jeremy Lott","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Jeremy Lott","Est. reading time":"2 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/","name":"Broke With Envy","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#website"},"datePublished":"2012-06-14T14:20:36+00:00","dateModified":"2012-06-14T16:04:37+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#\/schema\/person\/6c759d696b2f864e0678fac4bf4e792d"},"description":"On Real Clear Books today, I linked to Jessa Crispin's latest literary advice column, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Broke With Envy"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/","name":"Jeremy Lott's Diary","description":"An insider's look at religion news and commentary","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#\/schema\/person\/6c759d696b2f864e0678fac4bf4e792d","name":"Jeremy Lott","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ffd29bbac59597c87f9338596cbf8921?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ffd29bbac59597c87f9338596cbf8921?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Jeremy Lott"},"url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/author\/jlott\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/204","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1078"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=204"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/204\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=204"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=204"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=204"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}

{"id":204,"date":"2012-06-14T07:20:36","date_gmt":"2012-06-14T14:20:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/?p=204"},"modified":"2012-06-14T09:04:37","modified_gmt":"2012-06-14T16:04:37","slug":"broke-with-envy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jeremylott\/2012\/06\/broke-with-envy\/","title":{"rendered":"Broke With Envy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

On Real Clear Books<\/a> today, I linked to Jessa Crispin\u2019s latest literary advice column<\/a>, on the subject of envy. Jessa counsels the married friend of a jealous single woman that being there for her will be \u201clike trying to hug a crocodile: It might need the affection, and even be desperate for it, but it\u2019s gonna take a chunk out of you if you try.\u201d<\/p>\n

The advice seeker professes not to \u201cunderstand it\u201d that her friend\u2019s still single: \u201cshe\u2019s beautiful and smart and so funny.\u201d I do understand it, because I have dated That Girl, and she\u2019s ugly. Oh, sure, she might be hot but envy is just about the least attractive personality trait a girl can have. It drapes everything in very unflattering shadows.<\/p>\n

The envious girl can\u2019t ever enjoy herself because every experience is reduced to a vicious Darwinian struggle for status. When she doesn\u2019t have a boyfriend, she wants other women\u2019s husbands. When she does have a boyfriend, she wants a better one. None of this can ever make her happy because she is essentially an emotional (and, for the purposes of long term relationships, guys, financial) black hole. <\/p>\n

To be fair, I have also counseled That Guy. In fact, I have run into him a lot in Washington DC. He usually takes the form of a writer for me, because that\u2019s the business I\u2019m in. He may be funny and smart and, for all I know, good looking, but he\u2019s constantly sabotaging himself.<\/p>\n

The man sick with envy can never enjoy his successes because of the successes of others. He takes every business decision that doesn\u2019t go his way as a personal affront. He blows perfectly good opportunities because he wants better ones. When he gets those better opportunities, he quickly manufactures reasons why they aren\u2019t good enough. One struggles to communicate the point to him, and then finally gives up, that envy is awful for business.<\/p>\n

I have often heard it said that envy is the one deadly sin from which we do not derive a lick of pleasure. That\u2019s true enough, but more needs to be said. Envy renders people beyond pleasure. It\u2019s like perpetual starvation not because you lack food but because you are unable to derive any sustenance from your food.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"