{"id":9818,"date":"2018-02-26T16:27:45","date_gmt":"2018-02-26T21:27:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/?p=9818"},"modified":"2018-02-26T16:27:45","modified_gmt":"2018-02-26T21:27:45","slug":"unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/","title":{"rendered":"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"Unfriend<\/a><\/p>\n

Introduction: Detox, Discern, Decide<\/h3>\n

With Unfriend Yourself<\/em>, Kyle Tennant has written a how-to guide for the Christian who wants to prevent social media from being a hindrance to one\u2019s life and faith.\u00a0The book is designed to be used as a tool to help someone go on a Facebook fast. Tennant hopes that the reader will gain a basic understanding of communication theory. He describes a three-step process during this Facebook fast. These steps include: detox, discern, and decide.<\/p>\n

First, Tennant shows how four promises social media makes are negatively affecting us and our relationships. He also shares the danger that comes when you are isolated. Many people, who need personal contact and don\u2019t have it, will \u201cstalk\u201d their friends, family, and others online.<\/p>\n

Next, Tennant notes how \u201cfriends\u201d on Facebook are not really friends. They are acquaintances. They are people whom one has \u201cfriended\u201d on Facebook. Yet, only people whom one has had an actual contact in the real world were friends.<\/p>\n

Importantly, Tennant makes the important distinction between network and community. A community needs bodies. When the network becomes based upon the self (as Facebook and other social media networks do), then it becomes increasingly difficult to love others (1 Peter 1:22, 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, Colossians 3:14).<\/p>\n

I agree with Tennant that clearly, we have a problem when we seek community on a medium that is more about us than it is about others.<\/p>\n

The Bible teaches that community by definition has been physical from the beginning (Genesis 1:27). As Christians, we are called to meet together (Hebrews 10:24-25), and greet one another (Romans 16:16, 1 Peter 5:14). In 2 John 12, the apostle sought personal contact with the church community.<\/p>\n

Consuming Social Media Responsibly<\/h3>\n

Helpfully, Tennant suggests ways to deal with social media responsibly. He suggests managing your Facebook usage by learning to be your own master. One can learn to use supplements \u201csupplementally.\u201d In other words, use Facebook to supplement relationships, but not as a replacement. Spend time face-to-face with people as much as possible (2 John 12, 3 John 13-14). Avoid being \u201cjust\u201d. In other words: stop using the following ways to relate to others:<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll just text him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll just shoot her a message.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll just write on his wall.\u201d<\/p>\n

He shows a scale of caring for those in need, or \u201crelational responsibility.\u201d The more \u201cdigital\u201d the method, the least desirable. On the other hand, the more \u201cface-to-face\u201d the method, the more desirable. From worst to best it goes like this: text, then social media, email, a handwritten card, a phone call, and finally an in-person visit.<\/p>\n

Tennant shares that social media has an agenda: to get you to talk about yourself. Self-presentation + sinful self = self-promotion. Therefore, a Christian should use filters when they post on social media. These filters include:<\/p>\n

FILTERS FOR MY SOCIAL MEDIA POSTING, TWEETING, AND UPDATING<\/h3>\n

1. Encouragement Filter \u2013 Will what I write here build someone up? Or will it be malicious, boastful, and slanderous (Ephesians 4:29)<\/p>\n

2. Care Filter \u2013 Are my words careless or careful? (Matthew 12:36, James 1:19, Proverbs 13:3)<\/p>\n

3. Praise Filter \u2013 Are my posts and tweets good, honorable, praiseworthy? (Philippians 4:8)<\/p>\n

4. Discernment Filter \u2013 Are my posts and tweets tested and spiritually proofread to see if it is wise to write? (Ephesians 5:15-16, 1 Thessalonians 5:21)<\/p>\n

5. God-glorification Filter \u2013 Are my posts and tweets glorifying to God? (Colossians 1:15-16)<\/p>\n

Finally, Tennant ends with a great summary. As Christians, we should approach social media:<\/p>\n

\n

My hope is that we become a generation that questions technology, that chooses to fight for friendships and relationships, and that seeks to use these ever-more-present technologies as opportunities to glorify God. Social media is a great tool\u2014a tool we must subdue, and not be subdued by.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

For Christians who have difficulty using social media, this book provides help. I encourage every Christian to read this book for it will guide how one can use social media responsibly.<\/p>\n

You can check out Tennant\u2019s website<\/a>. You can follow him on Twitter<\/a>. You can find him on Facebook<\/a> as well.<\/p>\n

You can purchase the book on Amazon<\/a>, and Faithlife eBooks<\/a>.<\/p>\n

I wrote about my own Facebook fast. I posted about my desire to try to fast from Facebook<\/a> and its results<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Here are other articles about social media:<\/p>\n

The Four<\/em> by Scott Galloway<\/a><\/p>\n

Culture Watch: Social Media Afterlife<\/a><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\n<\/p><\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Introduction: Detox, Discern, Decide With Unfriend Yourself, Kyle Tennant has written a how-to guide for the Christian who wants to prevent social media from being a hindrance to one\u2019s life and faith.\u00a0The book is designed to be used as a tool to help someone go on a Facebook fast. Tennant hopes that the reader will […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2886,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[46,100],"tags":[410,777,2471,1695,1858,2097],"class_list":["post-9818","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-book-review-reviews","category-reviews","tag-book-review","tag-facebook","tag-kyle-tennant","tag-reviews-2","tag-social-media","tag-twitter"],"yoast_head":"\nUnfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant is a Christian book review for the book which explores how a Christian can detox, discern and decide how to deal with social media.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant is a Christian book review for the book which explores how a Christian can detox, discern and decide how to deal with social media.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Jim Erwin\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/revjimerwin\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2018-02-26T21:27:45+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/files\/2018\/02\/Unfriend-Yourself-by-Kyle-Tennant-214x300.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Jim Erwin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@revjimerwin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Jim Erwin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/\",\"name\":\"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2018-02-26T21:27:45+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2018-02-26T21:27:45+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/#\/schema\/person\/d60794d59235a0279dec26398d994dcb\"},\"description\":\"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant is a Christian book review for the book which explores how a Christian can detox, discern and decide how to deal with social media.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/2018\/02\/26\/unfriend-yourself-kyle-tennant\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Unfriend Yourself by Kyle Tennant\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/\",\"name\":\"Jim Erwin\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/#\/schema\/person\/d60794d59235a0279dec26398d994dcb\",\"name\":\"Jim Erwin\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/jimerwin\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/70772a6e533e4bcbd0ac0e0af2d62ff1?s=96&d=identicon&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/70772a6e533e4bcbd0ac0e0af2d62ff1?s=96&d=identicon&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Jim Erwin\"},\"description\":\"My name is Jim Erwin. 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