![\"ECG](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/243\/2015\/07\/ECG-2014-24b.jpg\")
<\/a>It\u2019s the middle of September and for the first time in six years, I\u2019m not getting ready to go to Pennsylvania for the OBOD East Coast Gathering.<\/p>\n
I missed the first ECG in 2010, but I was there for the non-stop rain in 2011<\/a>. In 2012<\/a> I had a great time listening to Philip Carr-Gomm and John Michael Greer talk about Druidry. In 2013<\/a> I helped lead the Cernunnos Ritual in a truly magical setting, and I participated in \u00a0fulfilling but exhausting five-hour initiation session. I was in a stressful place in 2014<\/a> \u2013 ECG provided a much-needed retreat. In 2015<\/a>, I listened to Kristoffer Hughes honor the contributions of Iolo Morganwg to modern Druidry and I talked with Damh the Bard for a DruidCast interview<\/a>.<\/p>\n But before I left last year\u2019s ECG, I told camp director Lorraine Soria that I wouldn\u2019t be back in 2016. We thought our Chosen Chief would be returning this year \u2013 there are others who need to talk to Philip more than I do (due to scheduling conflicts, he can\u2019t make it this year \u2013 maybe in 2017). And I\u2019ve done a lot of traveling this year \u2013 I\u2019m out of vacation days and travel budget. I can\u2019t do everything I want to do. With the Gulf Coast Gathering<\/a> now up and running I can participate in an OBOD retreat that is drivable for me and therefore much less expensive.<\/p>\n I\u2019ll miss spending four days in the Poconos, away from work and blog and everything else. I\u2019ll miss seeing the friends I\u2019ve made among the ECG regulars, and I\u2019ll miss meeting the new people who are coming for the first time. Mainly I\u2019ll miss the informal but deep conversations you just can\u2019t have anywhere else.<\/p>\n This will be the seventh year for the East Coast Gathering. It\u2019s a well-run retreat, it\u2019s become a fixture on the calendar, and I expect it will continue indefinitely. But my time with the ECG has come to an end, at least for now.<\/p>\n Our Buddhist<\/a> friends talk about impermanence: the idea that everything is transient and nothing lasts forever. Our refusal to accept impermanence \u2013 our attachment to the way things are or the way we wish they were \u2013 is one of the major causes of suffering. (There are deep implications of the doctrine of impermanence in Buddhism<\/a> \u2013 for our purposes as Pagans, this high level understanding should suffice).<\/p>\n When I told my wife I was writing on letting go of things that have run their course, she laughed. \u201cYou never let go of anything.\u201d She\u2019s not wrong. Here lately I\u2019ve run into trouble holding on to a dream \u2013 the dream of a Polytheist Restoration.<\/p>\n Over the past four or five years we\u2019ve seen the emergence of multiple varieties of a particular form of polytheism. This form is rooted in the beliefs and practices of our ancient ancestors \u2013 some varieties attempt to reconstruct our ancestral religions, while others are simply inspired by them. It is expressed in values, with hospitality and reciprocity at the top of the list. It is devotional \u2013 honoring the Gods in ritual and sacrifice is a foundational practice. Many varieties have an ecstatic and oracular component \u2013 the Gods speak to people and make Their presence known, sometimes subtly and sometimes in dramatic and life-altering fashion. They are out-reaching \u2013 they may be small or quiet but they are not occult orders. And they are community based \u2013 the focus is not on the individual priest or devotee, but on the collection of priests, devotees, and other supporters, whether that collection is local, virtual, or a combination of the two.<\/p>\n This is my<\/em> polytheism. This is the polytheism I\u2019m called to practice and promote. And I love it.<\/p>\n When I saw this particular form of polytheism start to grow, I started to dream. I dreamed of institutions and infrastructure. I dreamed of priesthoods, temples, and a strong public presence. I dreamed of a time when temples to deities and pantheons would be common. Perhaps not as common as Baptist churches in Texas, but at least as common as UU congregations. Clearly this Polytheist Restoration would not be complete in my lifetime, nor likely in the lifetime of anyone alive today. But we were on the path that would get us there.<\/p>\n Was this an unrealistic dream? Probably. But dreams don\u2019t care about realism \u2013 they just want what they want.<\/p>\n 2016 has not been kind to this particular form of polytheism, nor to my dream of its growth. The reasons are many, varied, and not particularly relevant to this blog post. They are \u2013 to the best of my knowledge \u2013 almost entirely human issues and not deity issues\u2026 but seeing as how religion is ultimately a human endeavor, that\u2019s little comfort. At best, this movement \u2013 our movement, my movement \u2013 has taken several steps back and will start moving forward again before too long, having learned a few valuable lessons. At worst, the Gods will decide to throw us all back and try again with another group of priests, devotees, and supporters in a few years or a few decades.<\/p>\n [Two caveats to hopefully avoid conflict in the comments. One, if your polytheism is something other than this, then I\u2019m not talking about you. Two, if your polytheism is something like this and you\u2019re having a great 2016, please share your story. I couldn\u2019t possibly stay in touch with every ecstatic, oracular, devotional, public polytheist tradition and group in the world. I could use some success stories right\u00a0now.]<\/p>\n Though I could see what was happening as well as anyone, I\u2019ve been slow to accept it. Letting go of a beloved event I\u2019ve participated in for five years straight? That\u2019s easy. Letting go of a dream? That\u2019s hard. This is a textbook case of attachment. As Buddhism predicts, suffering has followed.<\/p>\n And so it\u2019s time to let go\u2026 of the dream. The Polytheist Restoration will happen in its own time \u2013 or not. I may have a part to play in it \u2013 or not. It may look and feel something like what I\u2019ve envisioned, or it may look and feel completely different. I make my living as an engineer, but it\u2019s time to put away the blueprints and project plans.<\/p>\n It\u2019s time to focus on my calling as a priest of two Gods, a devotee of a third, and a semi-regular servant of several more. It\u2019s time to get back to studying the ways of my ancestors, of living their values, and of serving the community I have instead of obsessing over the community I don\u2019t. It\u2019s time to focus on the presence of the Gods Themselves. It\u2019s time to focus on those who hear Their call and are looking for a home or just a helpful word.<\/p>\n I\u2019m a Pagan, a polytheist, and a Druid, not a Buddhist. But there is great wisdom in Buddhism, including the concepts of impermanence and attachment. And suffering.<\/p>\n I\u2019m tired of suffering.<\/p>\n Sunday is my night to make offerings to the Morrigan<\/a>. I have a nice Malbec that should make an acceptable offering. I need to pour a libation and then listen\u2026 and listen well.<\/p>\n