{"id":6513,"date":"2017-05-26T17:56:06","date_gmt":"2017-05-26T23:56:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/?p=6513"},"modified":"2017-05-26T17:56:06","modified_gmt":"2017-05-26T23:56:06","slug":"pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html","title":{"rendered":"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

I love the Pirates of the Caribbean<\/em> movies \u2013 they fascinate me.<\/p>\n

They\u2019re visually amazing, the music is awesome, and the characters are memorable. The stories are good and there\u2019s enough historical accuracy to make the magic believable (hint to aspiring writers \u2013 get the mundane details right!).<\/p>\n

They\u2019re my favorite movies for inspiration to re-enchant the world. The Lord of the Rings<\/em> trilogy are better films and much better stories, but nothing makes me feel like I can successfully navigate my way through a world that\u2019s stacked against me than the Pirates<\/em> movies.<\/p>\n

And that\u2019s because the Pirates<\/em> movies offer simple but powerful guidance: \u201cwhat would Jack do?\u201d Gordon White of Rune Soup says Jack Sparrow (\u201cCaptain<\/em> Jack Sparrow!\u201d) is the best example of the Trickster since Bugs Bunny, and he\u2019s right. Gordon calls the Pirates<\/em> films \u201cthe best depictions of western magic ever committed to celluloid.<\/a>\u201d<\/p>\n

I love the characters (Will, Governor Swann, Norrington) who do the right thing even when it\u2019s not the proper, legal thing. I love the inventiveness and resiliency \u2013 in the words of Captain Jack \u201cthe only rules that really matter are what a man can do and what a man can\u2019t do.\u201d I love the growth of Elizabeth Swann from damsel in distress to Pirate King. Her \u201choist the colors\u201d speech in At World\u2019s End<\/em> never fails to move me to tears.<\/p>\n

And I love the magic, from the cursed pirates to Tia Dalma to the green flash. In the words of Captain Barbossa, \u201cit\u2019s not getting to the Land of the Dead that\u2019s the problem. It\u2019s getting back.\u201d<\/p>\n

They have their problems. The Curse of the Black Pearl<\/em> is about 20 minutes too long \u2013 it drags in the final third. Cannibal Island in Dead Man\u2019s Chest<\/em> is ahistorical<\/a> and uncomfortable to watch. The ten minutes of Jack in Davy Jones\u2019 Locker in At World\u2019s End<\/em> is punishment for the audience, and does anybody really believe that Elizabeth Swann, Pirate King, would give it all up to be a stay-at-home mom?<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t get me started about On Stranger Tides<\/em>. The concept was good, but the story was weak. And who was Angelica? Was she really Blackbeard\u2019s daughter? A pirate? A distressing damsel? A conwoman who got caught up in her own con? Complicated characters are one thing \u2013 confusing writing is another.<\/p>\n

But the problems are minor compared to the sheer pleasure of watching the movies. They\u2019re on TV a lot, and I\u2019ve seen them enough times that dropping in after they start or dropping out before they finish is no problem. And on those rare occasions when I\u2019ve got a free evening to spend on the couch, they\u2019re the first DVDs I reach for.<\/p>\n

And that brings us to the fifth Pirates<\/em> movie, Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/em>. It\u2019s been six years since On Stranger Tides<\/em>, and the trailers looked promising, so I took off Friday afternoon to go see it.<\/p>\n

\"Pirates<\/a><\/p>\n

There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/em> \u2013 and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. It opens like the first movie: a short scene with a child character, then a fast forward to nine years later. Jack Sparrow comes to town to pirate and ends up in jail awaiting execution. We have a young man of modest means (Brenton Thwaites as Henry Turner \u2013 yes, that<\/em> Turner) and a young, well-educated woman (Kaya Scodelario as Carina Smyth) who refuses to be constrained by the societal expectations for women. There are cursed pirates, hidden treasures, and maps that no man can read.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s the fifth movie in a series \u2013 you know what\u2019s going to happen (mostly). The question is how. The answer is in usual Pirates<\/em> fashion: with wild chases, double crosses, amazing ingenuity, and magic.<\/p>\n

It works \u2013 mostly. Johnny Depp is being criticized in reviews for lazy acting, but at the beginning Jack Sparrow is down on his luck, and thus even more drunk than usual. Later on he has less to do than other characters, particularly the new ones. It\u2019s being criticized for having too many subplots \u2013 I wonder if those reviewers watched the first four installments? There are a couple of points that appear to be at odds with the previous stories, but maybe not. Still, this is the shortest of the Pirates<\/em> movies at 2:09 \u2013 there was plenty of time to tie up loose ends. Movies make it to DVD quickly these days \u2013 it will be interesting to see if there were any deleted scenes that might have made the story tighter.<\/p>\n

\"pirates-5-carina\"<\/a>Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot. The formula worked \u2013 it felt like the original Curse of the Black Pearl<\/em>. The old characters felt familiar, the new characters were likeable and believable, and the plot was entertaining. It didn\u2019t have the intricate stories and socio-economic commentary of the second and third films, but it had an ending that was deeply satisfying.<\/p>\n

I need to see it again a time or three before I start to dissect it for magical lessons and other subtleties. This was the first new Pirates<\/em> movie in six years \u2013 I went into the theater to enjoy it, not to study it.<\/p>\n

As with all the Pirates<\/em> movies, stay till the credits are done. The final scene hints at a sixth movie, which may or may not be made \u2013 a lot depends on this weekend\u2019s box office. Early returns are good<\/a>, and word of mouth seems to be far better than the professional reviews.<\/p>\n

If, like me, you love the Pirates<\/em> movies, go. You\u2019ll enjoy it. If you liked the first three but not the fourth, go. Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/em> is far better than On Stranger Tides<\/em>. If you think the first movie was awesome and you hated all the sequels, why are you even bothering to read this review?<\/p>\n

But if you skip it, you\u2019ll miss a fun 2 hours and 9 minutes.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/em>, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1129,"featured_media":6515,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[1315,1316,42,264,1314],"class_list":["post-6513","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dead-men-tell-no-tales","tag-jack-sparrow","tag-magic-2","tag-movies","tag-pirates-of-the-caribbean"],"yoast_head":"\nPirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"John Beckett\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2017-05-26T23:56:06+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/243\/2017\/05\/Pirates-of-the-Caribbean-5-E.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"768\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"384\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"John Beckett\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"John Beckett\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html\",\"name\":\"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2017-05-26T23:56:06+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2017-05-26T23:56:06+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#\/schema\/person\/b4c8980dc36f971434424c304ca429ad\"},\"description\":\"There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/\",\"name\":\"John Beckett\",\"description\":\"Musings of a Druid, Pagan, and Unitarian Universalist.\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#\/schema\/person\/b4c8980dc36f971434424c304ca429ad\",\"name\":\"John Beckett\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/0f50bfa2a79f70103847fe75540bb29c?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/0f50bfa2a79f70103847fe75540bb29c?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"John Beckett\"},\"description\":\"I grew up in Tennessee with the woods right outside my back door. Wandering through them gave me a sense of connection to Nature and to a certain Forest God. I\u2019m a Druid graduate of the Order of Bards, Ovates and Druids, the Coordinating Officer of the Denton Covenant of Unitarian Universalist Pagans and a former Vice President of CUUPS Continental. I\u2019ve been writing, speaking, teaching, and leading public rituals for the past eleven years. I live in the Dallas \u2013 Fort Worth area and I earn my keep as an engineer.\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/author\/johnbeckett\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales","description":"There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales","og_description":"There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html","og_site_name":"John Beckett","article_published_time":"2017-05-26T23:56:06+00:00","og_image":[{"width":768,"height":384,"url":"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/243\/2017\/05\/Pirates-of-the-Caribbean-5-E.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"John Beckett","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"John Beckett","Est. reading time":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html","name":"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#website"},"datePublished":"2017-05-26T23:56:06+00:00","dateModified":"2017-05-26T23:56:06+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#\/schema\/person\/b4c8980dc36f971434424c304ca429ad"},"description":"There\u2019s a bit of formula to Dead Men Tell No Tales, and that\u2019s not necessarily a bad thing. Here\u2019s the bottom line: I enjoyed it. A lot.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/2017\/05\/pirates-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Pirates of the Caribbean \u2013 Dead Men Tell No Tales"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/","name":"John Beckett","description":"Musings of a Druid, Pagan, and Unitarian Universalist.","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#\/schema\/person\/b4c8980dc36f971434424c304ca429ad","name":"John Beckett","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/0f50bfa2a79f70103847fe75540bb29c?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/0f50bfa2a79f70103847fe75540bb29c?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"John Beckett"},"description":"I grew up in Tennessee with the woods right outside my back door. Wandering through them gave me a sense of connection to Nature and to a certain Forest God. I\u2019m a Druid graduate of the Order of Bards, Ovates and Druids, the Coordinating Officer of the Denton Covenant of Unitarian Universalist Pagans and a former Vice President of CUUPS Continental. I\u2019ve been writing, speaking, teaching, and leading public rituals for the past eleven years. I live in the Dallas \u2013 Fort Worth area and I earn my keep as an engineer.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/"],"url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/author\/johnbeckett"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6513","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1129"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6513"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6513\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6515"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6513"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6513"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/johnbeckett\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6513"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}