\n<\/strong>
\nThe Practice:<\/em><\/strong>
\nBe mind full of good.<\/strong><\/strong><\/p>\n
Why?<\/em> Neurons that fire together, wire together. This means that each one of us has the power to use the mind to change the brain to change the mind for the better. To benefit oneself and other beings.<\/p>\n Using this internal power is more important than ever these days, when so many of us are pushed and prodded by external forces \u2013 the economy, media, politics, workplace policies, war on the other side of the world, the people on the other side of the dining room table \u2013 and by our reactions to them.<\/p>\n Life is often hard. To cope with hard things, to be effective and successful, or simply to experience ordinary well-being, we need resources inside, inner strengths<\/em> like resilience, compassion, gratitude and other positive emotions, self-worth, and insight.<\/p>\n Some strengths are innate \u2013 built into your DNA \u2013 but most are acquired, woven over time into the fabric of your brain. These lasting traits come from passing states \u2013 experiences of the inner strength \u2013 that get installed<\/em> into the brain. You become more<\/span> grateful through internalizing repeated experiences of gratitude; you become more compassionate through internalizing repeated experiences of compassion; etc.<\/p>\n So far, so obvious. But here\u2019s the catch: without this installation \u2013 without the transfer of the experience from short-term memory buffers to long-term storage \u2013 beneficial experiences such as feeling cared about are momentarily pleasant but have no lasting value. Yikes! There is no learning, no growth, no change for the better.<\/p>\n Meanwhile, your brain is rapidly and efficiently turning unpleasant, negative experiences \u2013 feeling frazzled, stressed, worried, frustrated, irritated, inadequate, hurt, etc. \u2013 into neural structure. To help our ancestors survive in harsh conditions, the brain evolved a negativity bias<\/em> that makes it good at learning from bad experiences but relatively bad at learning from good ones \u2013 even though learning from good experiences is the main way to grow the inner strengths we all need.<\/p>\n In effect, today our brains have a well-intended, universal learning disability because they\u2019ve been painstakingly built over millions of years for peak performance . . . in Stone Age conditions.<\/p>\n Most of us are pretty good at having beneficial experiences \u2013 but pretty bad at installing them in the brain. Similarly, most therapists, mindfulness teachers, coaches, parents, and human resources trainers are pretty good at encouraging beneficial experiences in others, but pretty bad at helping them get installed in those brains; this was certainly true for me.<\/p>\n In effect, most beneficial experiences are wasted most of the time. The result is a learning curve, a growth rate, that is a lot flatter than it needs to be.<\/p>\n Poignantly, because we are not internalizing most of our wholesome, beneficial experiences \u2013 authentic moments of feeling relaxed, capable, peaceful, glad, successful, contented, appreciated, loved, and loving \u2013 we feel emptier inside than we truly deserve to feel. And we become a lot easier to manipulate by fear, consumerism, and \u201cus vs. them\u201d conflicts.<\/p>\n What can we do?<\/p>\n We can use the mind to change the brain for the better.<\/p>\n How?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n Here\u2019s the essence: Have It, Enjoy It.<\/p>\n In other words, have a beneficial experience in the first place \u2013 usually because you simply notice one you are already having: you\u2019re already feeling a bit of ease, relief, pleasure, connection, warmth, determination, confidence, clarity, hope, etc. And it\u2019s fine to create<\/em> beneficial experiences, such as deliberately thinking of things you feel thankful for, or calling up compassion for someone in pain, or recalling how it felt in your body to assert yourself with someone who was being pushy.<\/p>\n Then, once you\u2019ve got that good experience going, really enjoy it: taking 5, 10, or more seconds to protect and stay with it, and open to it in your body. The longer and more intensely those neurons fire together, the more they\u2019ll be wiring this inner strength into your brain.<\/p>\n This is positive neuroplasticity<\/em>, the essence of self-reliance: taking in everyday experiences to develop more inner strengths such as grit, confidence, kindness, emotional balance, happiness, patience, and self-awareness.<\/p>\n I don\u2019t believe in positive thinking. You\u2019re not overlooking the pains, losses, or injustices in life. I believe in realistic<\/em> thinking, seeing the whole mosaic of reality, the good, the bad, and the neutral. Precisely because life is often hard \u2013 and because we\u2019ve got a brain that\u2019s relatively poor at growing the inner strengths needed to deal with these challenges \u2013 we need to focus on the good facts in life, let them become good experiences, and then help these experiences really sink in.<\/p>\n Most of the time you take in the good will be in the flow of life, maybe half a dozen times a day, usually less than half a minute at a time. You can also use more structured moments, such as at meals, after exercising or meditation, or just before bed.<\/p>\n Besides being more open in general to beneficial experiences, you can look for those specific experiences that will grow the particular inner strength(s) that will help you the most these days. For example, if you\u2019re feeling anxious, look for authentic opportunities to feel supported, protected, resourced, tough-minded, relaxed, or calm. If life feels disappointing or blah, look for the genuine facts that naturally support experiences of gladness, gratitude, pleasure, accomplishment, or effectiveness. If you feel lonely or inadequate, look for the real occasions when you are included, seen, appreciated, liked, or loved \u2013 and open to feeling appropriately cared about, and valued; also look for chances to feel caring yourself, since love is love whether it is flowing in or flowing out.<\/p>\n Our beneficial experiences are usually mild \u2013 a 1 or 2 on the 0-10 scale of intensity \u2013 but they are real<\/span>. Any single time you let these experiences really land inside you won\u2019t change your life. But much as a cup of water is filled drop by drop, you\u2019ll be changing your brain synapse by synapse for the better \u2013 and your life for the better as well.<\/p>\n And with a mind full of good, you\u2019ll have more to offer others. Growing the good in them, too, in widening ripples seen and unseen, perhaps reaching eventually around the whole world.<\/p>\n The post Be Mind Full of Good<\/a> appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson<\/a>.<\/p>\n What’s in your mind? The Practice: Be mind full of good. Why? It’s kind of amazing: right now, what you think and feel, enjoy and suffer, is changing your brain. The brain is the organ that learns, designed by evolution to be changed by our experiences: what scientists call experience-dependent neuroplasticity. Neurons that fire together, <\/p>\n The post Be Mind Full of Good<\/a> appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":270,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[252,5],"tags":[25],"class_list":["post-568","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-be-mindful","category-just-one-thing","tag-blog"],"yoast_head":"\n
\n<\/strong>
\nIt\u2019s kind of amazing: right now, what you think and feel, enjoy and suffer, is changing your brain. The brain is the organ that learns, designed by evolution to be changed by our experiences: what scientists call experience-dependent neuroplasticity<\/em>.<\/p>\n<\/a>
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