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{"id":1350,"date":"2011-03-22T05:50:10","date_gmt":"2011-03-22T05:50:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wp.patheos.com\/community\/karenspearszacharias\/?p=1350"},"modified":"2011-03-22T05:50:10","modified_gmt":"2011-03-22T05:50:10","slug":"what-is-he-waiting-around-for","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/karenspearszacharias\/2011\/03\/22\/what-is-he-waiting-around-for\/","title":{"rendered":"What is he waiting around for?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

$\"\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

So I stripped the sheets from the bed because Mama taught me that if you are expecting company you\u2019d better have clean linens. I\u2019m not at all sure what Emily Post would say on this matter, but being southern and all, I think it\u2019s only hospitable to ask Jesus to stay the night whenever he gets here. The distance between heaven and earth can seem so very great some days, I expect Jesus might be worn out when he arrives. Even if he can\u2019t stay the night, he might appreciate a clean bed and a nap.<\/p>\n

I was going to start work on a new book but then I opened the web browser and saw another story about the disaster in Japan. As usual Evangelicals have taken this opportunity to point out the obvious \u2014 Jesus is coming soon. \u00a0Franklin Graham reportedly said \u201cas a woman gives birth to a child, those labor pains as they begin they start intensifying with more frequency.\u201d Glenn Beck, who considers himself some sort of Evangelical even if the rest of us don\u2019t, said he thought the devastation in Japan was a message from God.<\/p>\n

What\u2019s the point of starting a new project if God is going to show up any day now with a pink slip informing us all: Your time here is up<\/em>.<\/p>\n

So instead of writing one, I started reading a new book. It\u2019s okay if Jesus returns while I\u2019m in the middle of a book. I have stacks of books I have never finished reading, usually because like all those editors in New York keep telling me about my writing \u2014 I couldn\u2019t get engaged with the characters, plot, dialogue, narrative arc, the geographical landscape, the dog or the blind giraffe.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t bother making supper tonight because we had plenty of leftovers from Sunday dinner and the last thing anyone wants to be doing when Jesus arrives at the back door is cleaning out the refrigerator. I leave that to Tim and Poe, who by the way has figured out how to open the frig using just his snout.\u00a0I bet Jesus will get a kick out of that.<\/p>\n

I waited around for Jesus most of the day but when 6 o\u2019clock rolled around and he was still a no-show, I decided to go ahead to the gym. I had my cell phone with me and told Tim to ring me up if Jesus showed up.<\/p>\n

But here it is bedtime again, and still no sign of Jesus.<\/p>\n

If Jesus is watching Anderson Cooper or Glenn Beck talking about \u00a0how everything is falling apart on Planet Earth, \u00a0I completely understand why he stays away.<\/p>\n

Or maybe Jesus is simply worried about having to share the headlines with the likes of Charlie Sheen and Rob Bell.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"