![\"\"](\"https:\/\/kathyschiffer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/Love-300x225.jpg\")
I\u2019m still pondering an article I read this morning in The Onion<\/span>, that irreverent newsmagazine which specializes in theatre of the absurd.\u00a0 The headline reads:<\/p>\nZip-Lining Day Trip to Somehow Save Marriage<\/strong><\/h2>\n\u00a0The featured fantasy couple were facing a plethora of tough marital challenges:<\/p>\n
\n- An \u201cincreasingly hopeless, angst-ridden relationship\u201d<\/li>\n
- A deepening communications gap<\/li>\n
- The husband\u2019s temptation to have an affair<\/li>\n
- The wife\u2019s dissatisfaction with her dead-end job<\/li>\n
- Their indecision regarding whether or not to have children<\/li>\n
- Radically divergent views on religion<\/li>\n
- A virtual impasse regarding the wife\u2019s parents, who should either enter a nursing home (as he thinks) or come to live with the couple (as she thinks)<\/li>\n
- Her self-consciousness, which negatively impacts their sexual relationship<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
\u00a0Some of you old married folks, facing this perfect storm of emotional, physical and financial crises, might be tempted to throw in the towel.<\/strong>\u00a0 But not this couple!\u00a0 No, no\u2014thank goodness, they have a reservation to a New Hampshire \u201czip-lining center\u201d where, for a few glorious hours, they will fly through the trees with gay abandon, communing with nature and restoring the love they once felt for one another.<\/p>\nDarn!\u00a0 So that\u2019s what it takes!<\/strong><\/p>\nMy poor husband and I have floundered for days and years<\/strong> taking an alarmingly different path!\u00a0 We have prayed together, talked together, laughed together.\u00a0 We have listened patiently, tolerated one another\u2019s differences, kept quiet when we disagreed, forgiven one another\u2019s foibles, encouraged one another\u2019s strengths.\u00a0 We have saved when we might have splurged; lived within our means; shared our disappointments and celebrated our successes.\u00a0 We have loved the children God gave us, and have faced family and parenting issues with one consistent voice.<\/p>\nWhen we faced our own personal difficulties (oh, yes, we\u2019ve had our share!), we held fast to the promises we had made before our families and before our God, and we looked forward to a better day.\u00a0<\/p>\n
But never\u2014I repeat, never!\u2014did we remember to fortify our love with aerial acrobatics, with flights of fancy, with Zip-Line Zen!\u00a0 Oh, the hours we wasted on old-fashioned techniques like trust, love, kindness, patience and forgiveness!\u00a0<\/p>\n
Enough of this!\u00a0 We begin our skydiving lessons next week.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I\u2019m still pondering an article I read this morning in The Onion, that irreverent newsmagazine which specializes in theatre of the absurd.\u00a0 The headline reads: Zip-Lining Day Trip to Somehow Save Marriage \u00a0The featured fantasy couple were facing a plethora of tough marital challenges: An \u201cincreasingly hopeless, angst-ridden relationship\u201d A deepening communications gap The husband\u2019s […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":556,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[132,149,152],"tags":[2812,2827,2829,759],"class_list":["post-1846","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","category-love","category-marriage","tag-humor","tag-love","tag-marriage","tag-zip-lining"],"yoast_head":"\n
SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE IN FOUR HOURS OR LESS! (Don\u2019t Try This At Home) - SEASONS OF GRACE<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"At a \u201czip-lining center\u201d you can, for a few glorious hours, fly through the trees with gay abandon, restoring the love they once felt for one another.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/kathyschiffer\/2011\/04\/save-your-marriage-in-four-hours-or-less-dont-try-this-at-home\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE IN FOUR HOURS OR LESS! 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\u00a0Some of you old married folks, facing this perfect storm of emotional, physical and financial crises, might be tempted to throw in the towel.<\/strong>\u00a0 But not this couple!\u00a0 No, no\u2014thank goodness, they have a reservation to a New Hampshire \u201czip-lining center\u201d where, for a few glorious hours, they will fly through the trees with gay abandon, communing with nature and restoring the love they once felt for one another.<\/p>\n Darn!\u00a0 So that\u2019s what it takes!<\/strong><\/p>\n My poor husband and I have floundered for days and years<\/strong> taking an alarmingly different path!\u00a0 We have prayed together, talked together, laughed together.\u00a0 We have listened patiently, tolerated one another\u2019s differences, kept quiet when we disagreed, forgiven one another\u2019s foibles, encouraged one another\u2019s strengths.\u00a0 We have saved when we might have splurged; lived within our means; shared our disappointments and celebrated our successes.\u00a0 We have loved the children God gave us, and have faced family and parenting issues with one consistent voice.<\/p>\n When we faced our own personal difficulties (oh, yes, we\u2019ve had our share!), we held fast to the promises we had made before our families and before our God, and we looked forward to a better day.\u00a0<\/p>\n But never\u2014I repeat, never!\u2014did we remember to fortify our love with aerial acrobatics, with flights of fancy, with Zip-Line Zen!\u00a0 Oh, the hours we wasted on old-fashioned techniques like trust, love, kindness, patience and forgiveness!\u00a0<\/p>\n Enough of this!\u00a0 We begin our skydiving lessons next week.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I\u2019m still pondering an article I read this morning in The Onion, that irreverent newsmagazine which specializes in theatre of the absurd.\u00a0 The headline reads: Zip-Lining Day Trip to Somehow Save Marriage \u00a0The featured fantasy couple were facing a plethora of tough marital challenges: An \u201cincreasingly hopeless, angst-ridden relationship\u201d A deepening communications gap The husband\u2019s […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":556,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[132,149,152],"tags":[2812,2827,2829,759],"class_list":["post-1846","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","category-love","category-marriage","tag-humor","tag-love","tag-marriage","tag-zip-lining"],"yoast_head":"\n