{"id":629,"date":"2012-03-29T19:04:16","date_gmt":"2012-03-29T06:04:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kiwimormon.com\/?p=629"},"modified":"2015-01-02T16:18:05","modified_gmt":"2015-01-02T03:18:05","slug":"629","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/kiwimormon\/2012\/03\/629\/","title":{"rendered":"The Widows on Temple Square"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"2013-06-04<\/a>My friend Rachel and I spent a very pleasant couple of hours on Temple Square yesterday afternoon.\u00a0 I took my promised trip to the COB, and despite trying to convince my quite delicious elder guides to let me through the\u00a0 unmarked closed doors,\u00a0 I was unable to break in and thrust myself upon the unsuspecting COBBERS with a demand to know their deepest secrets.\u00a0 This was in part because of the excessive security that exists at the COB,\u00a0 but also because it simply doesn\u2019t seem like the decent thing to do to knock over sweet retirees in a bid to get to the inner sanctum.\u00a0 However the\u00a0 disappointment at my failure to infiltrate was muted by the discovery of a\u00a0 most extraordinary feminine sub-culture who daily escort COB guests up and down the elevators and out onto the balconies\u00a0 in their sturdy pantyhose, shoes and conservative Sunday best.\u00a0 These are the widows on Temple Square.<\/p>\n

Many of the volunteer \u2018guest services\u2019 Temple Square jobs are filled by retired men and women living in the Valley.\u00a0 In the COB, the volunteer jobs seem to be largely taken up by widows who happily take\u00a0 tourists up\u00a0 to the balconies of the COB to get a birds eye of Salt Lake City and beyond.\u00a0 However, more than the wonderful 25th floor views,\u00a0 I was simply struck by stories of these women.\u00a0 To many it\u00a0 might seem wholly mundane, but I for one was enthralled as they told me about the antics of ancestors long dead,\u00a0 husbands since passed, children long gone, and grandchildren and great-grandchildren\u00a0 who at last count total well into 10s.\u00a0\u00a0 I asked one woman \u2013 a widow of 13 years:<\/p>\n

Did you ever doubt this Mormon life of yours?\u00a0 Did you ever want to run away from it?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

She smilingly and knowingly replied:<\/p>\n

Yes of course, over the years I\u2019ve had that thought once or twice, but not seriously.\u00a0 I\u2019ve had a good life with a wonderful husband and beautiful children, that\u2019s what I\u2019d be giving up.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

When I suggested she might like a toy boy or another masculine diversion she laughed out loud:<\/p>\n

One husband was enough for me!\u00a0 I\u2019ve never had a desire for someone else.\u00a0 Although it can be very lonely.\u00a0 But I have purpose and I have hope and that\u2019s all one can ask for at this stage in life\u00a0 I suppose.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It might seem like an innocuous and facile\u00a0 conversation but it came on the heals of stories of polygamous wives, poverty, dances beside the lake to the swing and tap of big bands, weekly children of record baptisms in the tabernacle, angry great aunts who left the church and became staunch Catholics, the burning of effigies by be-robed KKK Mormons<\/a> on the front lawn of a newly married \u2018mixed race\u2019 couple, and laughter over the small burial plot for Brigham Young that simply wouldn\u2019t have been able to accommodate his numerous marriage partners.\u00a0 Her pantyhose and Sunday best belied a rich and interesting life and heritage which seemed worth paying attention to. And with that,\u00a0 like my many Mormon mothers and sisters back in New Zealand, there was no affront in my obvious lack of orthodoxy, there was no question I couldn\u2019t ask, there was no story that wasn\u2019t worth being told, and (I suspect) there is no pain that wouldn\u2019t be\u00a0 understood.<\/p>\n

And so it is with these widows. \u00a0 Mormon to the bone they spend their twilight days in the quiet pursuit of something meaningful and find it in their dignified service to the Church and in the quiet pleasure of their families.\u00a0 I love that my church brings me into proximity with such\u00a0 good, kind, humorous, loving and decent women.\u00a0 And so I salute\u00a0 you, my\u00a0 brilliant, wonderful, gracious Mormon mothers.\u00a0 Notwithstanding the searing interrogation of Mormonism I am inclined to, I want it publicly acknowledged that there is a gentle dignity in aspects of\u00a0 the Mormon life that is captured most beautifully in the lives of our women who make me feel proud to be a Mormon girl.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My friend Rachel and I spent a very pleasant couple of hours on Temple Square yesterday afternoon.\u00a0 I took my promised trip to the COB, and despite trying to convince my quite delicious elder guides to let me through the\u00a0 unmarked closed doors,\u00a0 I was unable to break in and thrust myself upon the unsuspecting […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1182,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-629","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Widows on Temple Square<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"My friend Rachel and I spent a very pleasant couple of hours on Temple Square yesterday afternoon.\u00a0 I took my promised trip to the COB, and despite trying\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, 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