Did you read that recent New York Times<\/em> article<\/a> on the United State\u2019s declining birth rate? Unsurprisingly, that article upset Lori Alexander, a fundamentalist blogger who urges women to stay at home and raise babies.<\/p>\n \u201cThere are no high-fertility countries that are gender equal,\u201d according to an article in The New York Times<\/strong> called Americans are Having Fewer Children<\/a>. \u201cWomen have more agency over their lives, and many feel that motherhood has become more of a choice.\u201d Many are not choosing to have children and be home to raise them. No, they want to be men and have freedom to have careers, use birth control so they can have sex without consequences, and pursue their dreams!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Um, yes. Yes, Lori. That\u2019s what we want to do.\u00a0Well, except for the actual\u00a0being<\/em> men part.<\/p>\n The only problem with this is that it leads to dire consequences. Of course, it does! God created women for a specific purpose and He created men for a specific purpose and they are different, good, and beneficial to a healthy society.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Um, okay \u2026 what<\/em> consequences?<\/p>\n Check out the reasons from this article why women aren\u2019t having children. One high on the list is student debt and women carry most of it<\/a>! But don\u2019t try to warn them about this<\/a> or you will be blasted even by the \u201cChristian\u201d community! College and careers are idols in our country and debt is one of the main reasons women aren\u2019t having children. This is foolishness!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Still nothing on what these \u201cdire consequences\u201d are. As for student debt\u2014yeah, that sucks. And yeah, it\u2019s one of the reasons many women are postponing childbearing (or going without it entirely). Lori\u2019s solution, though, is simply\u00a0not going to college.\u00a0<\/em>And not so that we can go to trade school, either. Lori wants us at home having babies and quietly submitting to our husbands while they go have careers.<\/p>\n Which sounds \u2026\u00a0fun.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n (Just so we\u2019re clear, that\u2019s what\u2019s called sarcasm.)<\/p>\n Lori next summarizes the reasons the\u00a0New York Times\u00a0<\/em>article says women are having fewer babies, briefly responding to each:<\/p>\n \u201cwant leisure time\u201d (pure selfishness and hedonism),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Um \u2026 okay.<\/p>\n \u201chaven\u2019t found a partner\u201d (it\u2019s not politically correct to say \u201chusband\u201d anymore and most men aren\u2019t attracted to feminists women, no, not even to \u201cChristian\u201d feminists),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n That\u2019s \u2026 not how this works. I would like to assure Lori that my husband is very attracted to me, and yes, I am a feminist. The real issue, to the extent that there is one, is that feminist women aren\u2019t attracted to sexist assholes, which limits their pool and seems more men\u2019s fault than feminist women\u2019s.<\/p>\n \u201ccan\u2019t afford child care\u201d (this shouldn\u2019t be something they even have to consider since mothers are the ones who should be caring for their own children),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Unless both partners want to keep working\u2014not all women want to be stay at home moms\u2014or a family can\u2019t afford to have one partner stay home full-time (Lori has words about this, too\u2014if I remember correctly, she thinks that if women left the workforce, men would get paid more, and families could afford to be single-family. This makes perfect sense, except for the fact that women started working outside of the home due to economic pressure and not vice versa.)<\/p>\n \u201cno desire for children\u201d (a product of a godless society),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Okay, question\u2014do we really want people who don\u2019t want children raising children? That sounds painful for everyone involved.<\/p>\n \u201ccan\u2019t afford a house\u201d (the burden of school debt is one of the main culprits here),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n One of, certainly\u2014but not the only. There\u2019s this little thing called low wages that also creates a problem for many millennial would-be homeowners. And having one partner quit work doesn\u2019t exactly help. (I find it interesting that Lori doesn\u2019t challenge the idea that children should be raised in houses,<\/em> and not in apartments or condos\u2014this is a very American sentiment.)<\/p>\n \u201cnot sure I\u2019d be a good parent\u201d (then learn from a godly, older woman),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n This rather depends on the reasons<\/em> people give for not thinking they\u2019d be good parents. It\u2019s often not about unfamiliarity with good parenting methods. (Speaking of which, I have issues with pointing parents to those Lori would deem \u201cgodly, older women\u201d\u2014their advice tends to revolve around using corporal punishment to \u201ctrain\u201d children into unthinking obedience, none of which is okay with me.)<\/p>\n \u201cworried about the economy\u201d (live a life of faith instead of fear!),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n I find myself curious what Lori would say about people in poverty who have kids they can\u2019t afford. I very much suspect it would be closer to \u201ckeep your legs together\u201d than \u201cgood job living a life of faith.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cworried about global instability\u201d (\u201cbe anxious for nothing\u2026\u201d),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n See above.<\/p>\n \u201ccareer is a greater priority\u201d (than having loved ones that you\u2019ve invested your life in surrounding you on your death bed?),<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Hold on a tick. How is wanting more leisure time \u201cpure selfishness\u201d while having kids so that they can be there when you die isn\u2019t? This seems more about different priorities than anything else, because in either case (wanting more leisure time and wanting a child at your deathbed) the desire is me-centered.<\/p>\n Lori goes on, quoting from the NYT article:<\/p>\n \u201cJessica Boer, 26, has a long list of things she\u2019d rather spend time doing than raising children: being with her family and her fianc\u00e9; traveling; focusing on her job as a nurse; getting a master\u2019s degree; playing with her cats.\u201d This life sounds a lot easier than a sacrificial life of being a help meet to a husband and bearing and raising children but what are the rewards for the kind of life she wants to lead? Has she not read all of the articles being written by older women who regret not getting married and having children when they were young<\/a>? They are growing old alone with their cats. These women have short-term vision instead of the long-term vision and the blessings that come with living a sacrificial life for the Lord and His ways.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Okay, Lori needs to figure out what she\u2019s actually arguing here, because I don\u2019t think she knows. Either happiness doesn\u2019t matter\u2014and all that matters is doing God\u2019s will\u2014or<\/em> women are happier if they marry, become homemakers, and raise children than they are if they remain single and\/or childless and have careers. She seems to be trying to argue both, but if the second is true the first is irrelevant at best.<\/p>\n Look at how confused her writing is:<\/p>\n You can\u2019t go against God\u2019s clearly stated will for you, young women, and expect good things to happen. He calls you to have meek and quiet spirits. He calls you to marry, bear children, and guide the home. He calls you to be joyful and thankful for all the good that He has done. This is what this culture needs \u2013 young women willing and available to live according to God\u2019s will for their lives. Love being a woman! You are loved and valued by God Almighty. Stop listening to how culture wants to define you and begin searching for your identity in Christ and His will for you.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n I\u2019m confused. Are we supposed to be happy? Or merely to do what God wants? Or both, maybe\u2014but only because I say it matters which Lori is arguing only because she seems to want to have her cake and eat it too. She insists that women are to do XYZ because\u00a0God said so\u00a0<\/em>and throws in the word \u201csacrificial.\u201d But she\u2019s\u00a0also\u00a0<\/em>arguing that women who have careers and do not have children are\u00a0miserable.\u00a0<\/em>Maybe women are just\u00a0always\u00a0<\/em>miserable? Perhaps childless career women are miserable because their wombs ache (or something), and SAHMs with kids are miserably self-sacrificial and all godly and such?<\/p>\n \u201cFor better or worse, mothers are the makers of men; they are the architects of the next generation. That\u2019s why the goal of becoming a godly mother is the highest and most noble pursuit of womanhood\u201d (John MacArthur).<\/p><\/blockquote>\nLori<\/del>\u00a0God has so commanded? I mean, Lori could say right out \u201cif you stay home you\u2019ll be happier,\u201d but she\u2019s not\u2014instead she\u2019s saying that God \u201ccalls you to be joyful and thankful,\u201d which may be the least joy-inspiring thing I\u2019ve ever read.<\/p>\n