Sometimes, from time to time, a fundamentalist or evangelical child grows up to question and reject her parents\u2019 beliefs and values. The funny thing is, this shift in belief is rarely seen as a legitimate rethinking and change of belief. Oh, no! Far from it! After all, how could a child raised on the Truth \u2122 go on to reject the Truth \u2122? How could a child raised to know Jesus and the amazing life he brings go on to reject him and his gift? It\u2019s incomprehensible! And so, an explanation must be found.<\/p>\n
When I changed my beliefs and left the beliefs my parents raised me on, they had to find such explanations. And they did. The two explanations they used most frequently were that I had been \u201cbrainwashed\u201d and that I was following after my \u201cfleshly lusts.\u201d<\/p>\n
You\u2019ve Been Brainwashed<\/strong><\/p>\n When I began changing my beliefs, both politically and religiously, my father concluded that I had been \u201cbrainwashed.\u201d Brainwashed by my liberal professors, to be exact.<\/p>\n The irony is, when this was all going on I was extremely afraid that I was <\/em>being brainwashed. After all, I\u2019d been taught that college students face brainwashing at the hands of their liberal professors and must carefully guard against it. As I found what I was learning was leading me to rethink my beliefs and values, I was very afraid that this is exactly what was happening to me.<\/p>\n At the time I confided this fear in my boyfriend, who is now my husband. Sean walked me mentally through the problem step by step, asking me what constituted \u201cbrainwashing\u201d and suggesting that I compare that to what my professors were doing. My professors, I said, were simply giving me information and asking me to think for myself \u2013 and they were. Furthermore, they weren\u2019t basing grades on my views or making any sort of requirement that I change them. They weren\u2019t doing anything close <\/em>to brainwashing. In fact\u2026what they were doing was pretty much the opposite. And so, little by little, I was able to let go of my fear of being brainwashed.<\/p>\n The trouble is, I can\u2019t exactly convince my dad of this. To him I will always be the good conservative godly daughter who went to college and was brainwashed by liberal college professors. The idea that I could have been thinking for myself, and could have honestly thought things through and formed my own opinion? Nope. Nada. I\u2019ve been brainwashed.<\/p>\n Following after Fleshly Lusts<\/strong><\/p>\n My mom, on the other hand, takes a different tact. She has informed me that I have changed my views because I am \u201cfollowing after my fleshly lusts.\u201d In other words, I\u2019ve changed my views because changing them allowed me to do things I really wanted to do but were condemned by God. For example, I decided that adult daughters should be independent from their fathers\u2019 control because I wanted to be able to date whom I pleased rather than obeying my father and letting him guide my romantic relationships.<\/p>\n To be honest, at one point I was a bit afraid that this might be the case. I was concerned about the fact that I followed my parents\u2019 beliefs until they got hard \u2013 i.e. until the started ordering me to do things I didn\u2019t want to do \u2013 and that I then changed my views, thus allowing me to do what I wanted to do instead of what they told me to do. In some ways it would be like a teen saying she didn\u2019t believe in premarital sex, and then getting a boyfriend and suddenly saying she didn\u2019t think premarital sex was wrong after all. But if you know anything about me, it\u2019s that I\u2019m introspective. I didn\u2019t change any belief without a great deal of thought, examination, and, yes, argumentation. I argued myself silly supporting my conservative opinions, finding, over time, that they simply didn\u2019t hold up. I didn\u2019t do or decide anything hastily or without reason.<\/p>\n But one aspect of this argument from fleshly lusts is that my mom was and is is convinced that I really truly do know <\/em>that her beliefs and views are right, I\u2019m just choosing to ignore that so that I can do as I please. I knew <\/em>adult daughters are under their father\u2019s authority, and that kissing before marriage was wrong, etc., and when I claimed I believed otherwise I was simply lying so that I could, well, do as I pleased, follow my \u201cfleshly lusts,\u201d etc. She\u2019s told me this many times.<\/p>\n The trouble is, there\u2019s no real way to combat this argument. Whatever I say, my mom can go on claiming that I know that she and her beliefs are correct, and that I\u2019m saying otherwise just to gratify my \u201cfleshly lusts.\u201d In the end, I end up feeling kind of stuck, like I\u2019ll never convince her that I have really formed my own opinions and beliefs. Seriously, think for myself? Nope! Fleshly lusts!<\/p>\n Conclusion<\/strong><\/p>\n When you\u2019re completely sure you\u2019re right, it\u2019s sometimes hard to understand why anyone would hold any other opinion. It\u2019s especially <\/em>hard to understand why someone raised on the Truth \u2122 you trust in so\u00a0implicitly\u00a0would go on to reject it. And so, you have to find a way to explain it. That person over there left the faith because she was brainwashed. <\/em>That other person left the faith because he wanted to follow his fleshly lusts. <\/em>Viola. Explanations.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Sometimes, from time to time, a fundamentalist or evangelical child grows up to question and reject her parents\u2019 beliefs and values. The funny thing is, this shift in belief is rarely seen as a legitimate rethinking and change of belief. Oh, no! Far from it! After all, how could a child raised on the Truth […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":845,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20,40],"tags":[150,60],"class_list":["post-6295","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-atheism","category-evangelicalism-fundamentalism","tag-emotional-abuse","tag-sin"],"yoast_head":"\n