Dunno who wrote this, but it\u2019s genius:<\/p>\n
I am the very model of a modern German cardinal
\nI\u2019m kind to all minorities peripheral and marginal
\nI know the mobile numbers of my seniors political
\nI try quite hard at humour and I\u2019m studiously uncritical
\nI\u2019m very fond of arguments heretic and schismatical
\nI like to bitch about my fellow Lords ecclesiastical
\nAbout Kasperian theorem I am teeming with a lot of news [pause]
\nWith many cheerful facts about conveyancing and empty pews
\nI\u2019m very well acquainted too with every kind of blasphemy
\nI know in every detail all the sins contr\u2019ry to chastity
\nIn short, in things political, peripheral and marginal
\nI am the very model of a modern German cardinal
\nI know the Church\u2019s history, from Schillebeeckx to G D Boff
\nI like to wear bad vestments and I\u2019m apt to take my cassock off
\nI quote in elegiacs all the crimes of the traditionalists
\nI make outrageous statements and proceed to slander journalists
\nI\u2019m very prone to avarice, and harbouring of catamites
\nAnd mawkish modern liturgies with troupes of female acolytes
\nIn profit from the Church tax I\u2019ve a juicy line in Simony
\nI\u2019m expert in denial and impervious to irony
\nThen I can write an article in favour of adultery
\nAnd praise unclean affections both unnatural and desultory
\nIn short, in things political, peripheral and marginal
\nI am the very model of a modern German cardinal
\nIn fact when I know what is meant by mercy, grace and charity
\nWhen I can tell at sight heroic virtue from depravity
\nWhen such affairs as doctrine and dogmatics I\u2019m more wary at
\nAnd when I learn precisely what became of Jude Iscariot
\nWhen I have grasped the rudiments of sexual biology
\nWhen I can make a fist of a believable apology
\nWhen I care more for men than for the dogs they keep at Battersea
\nYou\u2019ll say a better German Cardinal had never sat a See
\nFor my Catechetic knowledge, though I\u2019m pompous and effrontery,
\nIs limited by effort will and interest quite perfunctory
\nBut still in things political, peripheral and marginal
\nI am the very model of a modern German cardinal.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Dunno who wrote this, but it\u2019s genius: I am the very model of a modern German cardinal I\u2019m kind to all minorities peripheral and marginal I know the mobile numbers of my seniors political I try quite hard at humour and I\u2019m studiously uncritical I\u2019m very fond of arguments heretic and schismatical I like to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":92,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[3],"class_list":["post-94629","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-humor"],"yoast_head":"\n