I’m going to make a confession to you that many men will try to deny, but it’s the truth. Here it is…we men get our feelings hurt a lot more than we admit. We are not nearly as tough as we often pretend to be. Wow. I already feel a sense of relief now that this HUGE secret if off my chest! People create gender stereotypes where women are more “emotional,” but both men and women are emotional beings. Yes,... Read more
If you’re like most couples, you fell in love while doing fun things together. You went to concerts. You watched movies. You went on dates and laughed a lot. That’s something I remember about dating Karen how much fun we had. I believe every human being is at his or her best while having fun. That’s how you fall in love and that’s how you stay in love. If your marriage is no longer fun, then it may be in... Read more
When Karen and I first got married, I was completely ignorant about the inherent sexual differences between us. My ignorance was compounded by a limited sexual “education,” by way of pornography, locker-room lies, and the media’s portrayals of sex. After getting married, we had an active sex life and were attracted to each other, but our wrong sexual expectations caused a great deal of frustration. It was years before we finally understood—and began to respect—our differences. But as we grew... Read more
The Bible is crystal clear about our priorities: Put God first. Put people second. Matthew 6:33 spells it out for us. Jesus says, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” Jesus made this promise while chastising His disciples for their unbelief toward God and their anxiety about life’s provision. Jesus promised faithful and complete blessings for the person who gives God priority over everything else. But what does... Read more
In Colorado, two mighty rivers course through the state’s mountains and foothills. These independent bodies of water—the Roaring Fork and the Frying Pan—merge just outside of Basalt, Colorado, near the aptly named “Two Rivers Road.” There in the Roaring Fork Valley, you can stand on the bank and see the spot where the energies of these two massive waterways smash into each other, becoming a single powerful torrent. Thrill-seeking rafters from all over the state come here to ride these... Read more
Last week we talked about how we, as Christians, should rely on God to meet our deepest needs rather than relying on anything else—including our spouse. When we look to get our needs met by the world, three main problems are created: We’ll always be disappointed with the results, no matter how well things may go. We’ll lack the inner resources to love others the way we should, and the resources to confront life successfully. We’ll eventually be hurt and... Read more
What does it mean when you stand before your friends and family and get married? What is the purpose of a marriage? In my experience, most couples don’t have a good answer to this very basic question. That’s a shame. How can you succeed at something if you don’t know its purpose? It is vitally important for couples to understand not just what the two of them are trying to accomplish but also what God is trying to accomplish in... Read more
Let’s talk about sex. In the second chapter of Genesis, God created the institution of marriage in a paradise called Eden, which in the original language means “pleasure and delights.” He designed married to be an intimate union between a man and a woman—one fueled by sexual pleasure and delight. Sex is God’s creation. We need to remember that He wants us to enjoy it to the fullest within the parameters of marriage. We should also remember that all the... Read more
One of the most basic truths in Scripture is the doctrine of personal responsibility. It’s founded on the idea that God created us as free moral agents. He gave us a free will. In fact, everything we do is of our own choosing. Along with this freedom to choose, however, He has also given us the responsibility to use that freedom properly. Deuteronomy 30:19 expresses this truth clearly. God is speaking to Moses and the children of Israel before they... Read more
Imagine this: You’re sitting in Carnegie Hall, watching one of the world’s greatest violinists perform with breathtaking skill and artistry. His fingers are flying over the strings. The music fills the hall. He doesn’t miss a note. The audience erupts as he finishes the concert, and you are among them. The music moves you. The beauty and talent on display have inspired you. That evening, at a late dinner following the concert, you see that same musician ushered in to... Read more
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