{"id":28906,"date":"2021-08-05T07:56:30","date_gmt":"2021-08-05T14:56:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/?p=28906"},"modified":"2021-08-05T07:57:36","modified_gmt":"2021-08-05T14:57:36","slug":"wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html","title":{"rendered":"Wrapped in Silence: A Zen Reflection"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

Last night
\nI begged the Wise One to tell me
\nThe secret of the world.
\nGently, gently he whispered,
\n\u201cBe quiet,
\nThe secret cannot be spoken,
\nIt is wrapped in silence.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/iframe><\/p>\nHere we are together, a day and a half deep into sesshin, wading into the secret of the world. Perhaps your mind has settled slightly; perhaps not. Either way \u2014 good. Maybe you\u2019re tired. Maybe your back or your knees are aching. I know mine are! And right here, in the midst of quiet and discomfort \u2014 here is a great opportunity.<\/p>\nIn sesshin, we are invited into the prolonged practice of zazen together. Within this container of community, sitting, chanting, kinhin, and samu, or work practice, we are invited to explore deeply the vicissitudes of our own mind. And through this, we have an opportunity to practice stillness and complete presence with whatever arises \u2014 even when we don\u2019t like what bubbles up.<\/p>\nIn this container of sesshin, we practice alone, together; and together, alone. As Reb Anderson and countless other teachers have said, we can\u2019t do it by ourselves, and no one else can do it for us. During zazen, we are encouraged to sit as still and quietly as possible; not to shift or readjust our butts on the chair or zafu, even when both of our legs fall asleep; I am encouraged not to scratch that itch on my nose, even when I\u2019m convinced that it actually would solve all of my problems. It\u2019s an invitation to notice these distractions, these diversions \u2014 all the ways our minds are prone to flitting and thrashing about.<\/p>\nSo why do we do this? Why do we subject ourselves to so much likely frustration and discomfort? In a word, intimacy.<\/p>\nQuietly sitting zazen with a community is a precious form of practice that supports us with the most generous of conditions. Everything here is set up to support and remind us of practice \u2014 that is absolutely not the case out in the wild of the world, where we are bombarded by noise, people, advertisements, consumerism, and the hectic bustle of day-to-day life.<\/p>\nThis container that we create together is intentionally designed to slow things down; to limit our distractions, and encourage or at least invite the mind to confront itself fully, moment by moment, breath by breath. It is designed to make our practice of awareness just a little bit easier to engage, so we can cultivate our ability to return again, and again, and again, to just this. To our breath. To this very moment.<\/p>\nSometimes though, the harsh reality is that a fair number of the moments we awaken to aren\u2019t that fun. What happens when just this is dull, boring, unsatisfying, painful, or discouraging? When we find ourselves wanting things to be other than they are?<\/p>\nI really appreciate what Jan said yesterday \u2014 our hands aren\u2019t empty; they\u2019re open. I wonder how each of us might meet such moments with curiosity and possibility.<\/p>\n\u201cBe quiet, \nThe secret cannot be spoken, \nIt is wrapped in silence.\u201d<\/p>\nImagine a bird holding a thin, fine piece of cloth, and once every 100 years, flying over a 14-mile high mountain and gently brushing the cloth across the top. A kalpa is the length of time it would take to wear that mountain down to the ground.<\/p>\nOne moment, one kalpa.<\/p>\nThere are moments when time feels glacially slow, painfully drawn out, stretched like bubblegum across an infinite span of forever. Like when I\u2019m stuck in a traffic jam, or impatiently waiting to see someone I really miss, or perhaps like those occasions when I\u2019m sitting zazen and desperately waiting for the timekeeper to ring the bell already. (This is especially funny when I\u2019m the timekeeper).<\/p>\nThe opposite is also true. There are moments when time feels like it\u2019s flashing by at a terrifying speed. When in the blink of an eye, a child has grown up; sesshin is suddenly over; or a life has come to an end. When everything feels like it\u2019s moving too fast, and I don\u2019t know how to slow it down.<\/p>\nTo paraphrase Days Like Lightning by Taego Bou, a 14th-century Korean Zen master: \u201cThe days and months go by like lightning \u2014 we should value the time. We pass from life to death in the time it takes to breathe in and breathe out; it\u2019s hard to guarantee even a morning and an evening. At the end of the road, it\u2019s like an iron wall. Put down your myriad concerns and wake up. Whether walking or standing, sitting or lying down, do not waste even a minute. Become ever braver and bolder.\u201d<\/p>\nDon\u2019t wait to climb Mount Fuji. Don\u2019t wait to make that phone call you haven\u2019t had time for \u2014 make the time. Don\u2019t wait until you feel ready; that\u2019ll never happen. Don\u2019t wait for life to make sense, or for things to slow down. What time do you think you have? We can\u2019t guarantee even a morning or an evening. That\u2019s precisely why every day is a good day. Even the days that suck.<\/p>\nWhatever joy and muck it might bring, this is what we\u2019ve got. Maybe today that means sore knees and a tender heart. It\u2019s up to us what we choose to do with it.<\/p>\nThere is no magic armor that protects us from suffering. There is no way to avoid pain and sorrow \u2014 though god knows I try. But when we reframe this with open hands, with curiosity, with a mind of not knowing \u2014 with a mind of possibility \u2014 something transforms.<\/p>\nI lost my mom early last year. She died an ugly death. But last year was just her physical death. The truth is, I lost her long before that to addiction, depression, and heartbreak.<\/p>\nWhile sitting last night, deep in sesshin \u2014 held by this container of practice \u2014 my mind turned toward her, and I silently cried. Waves of anger, of missing her, aching for the person she used to be. My hands were empty.<\/p>\nAnd then, a memory of her hug. A full-on bear hug, squeezing me and rocking back and forth, and hearing her voice say \u201cI love you so much, my sweetie-baby.\u201d She said silly things like that. Suddenly my mind found my grandmother, Neen \u2013 my mom\u2019s mom. Then Mimi and Papa Bill, my dad\u2019s parents. Then Papa Golding and Sarah, my great-grand parents. Grandpa Jer; grandpa Jack, and backwards on to those I never actually met but heard stories about. With hands on one another\u2019s shoulders, they were all suddenly with me, and I felt the support and connection of generations whose lives all mysteriously contributed and led to my own. To this tender heart. My loss transformed in that moment. My hands were suddenly open.<\/p>\nIn my experience, this practice has made me more vulnerable; more raw, more likely to hear and feel the cries of the world. And if we\u2019re lucky, we\u2019ll be as present as possible for every moment of this fleeting life \u2014 not just the ones we prefer.<\/p>\nBeing awake to our breath, our bodies, our fickle thoughts and emotions\u2026 this is truly difficult. Zazen is an opportunity to come face to face with this life, this mind, just as it is. And this complicated, tangled, exquisit mess is exactly why I need sesshin.<\/p>\nThe sangha and the cushion provide a safe space to encounter ourselves as genuinely, honestly, and open-heartedly as possible. They create a container that fertilizes awareness. That\u2019s why there are so many little rules; bow here, gasho there, left foot first, bell now \u2014 each one an invitation to pay attention. To notice. Not just to the things we want to pay attention to, but to notice the world beyond our likes and dislikes, and to move in a way that is not constrained by the smoke and mirrors of craving and aversion.<\/p>\nThis is why, in sesshin, before entering the zendo, we take off our shoes and neatly set them straight; one right next to the other, perpendicular to the wall. This is why we aim to leave no traces, cleaning up splashes of water around the bathroom sink, and wiping our spot at the table after a meal; this is why wherever possible, we practice leaving spaces in better shape than we found them; and why during kinhin, we practice changing directions by pivoting in a slightly more angular way, with 90 degree turns when possible \u2014 because as Zen students, followers of the Way, we make a continual practice of not cutting corners.<\/p>\nAnd when we do cut corners, because we do and we will \u2014 recognize it when possible; and gently remind ourselves to return to this one continuous mistake, or as my brother recently put it, \u201cthis beautiful bouquet of fuck-ups,\u201d where the secret is simply to keep doing our best. Doing our best to remember; to pay attention; to practice intimacy; to walk with open hands; and to persevere with a generous heart. Do not waste even a minute.<\/p>\nWe try to pay attention to things like this during sesshin, so that we have a better chance of carrying this practice out into the world, into the stuff of our lives. Like I said, this is difficult. We can\u2019t do it by ourselves, and no one else can do it for us. Maybe that\u2019s why Hakuin Ekaku, a zen master from the 18th century, was known for saying, \u201cPractice in the midst of activity is a thousand times superior to practice in stillness.\u201d<\/p>\nBut we need to practice in stillness too, so we have a snowball\u2019s chance of doing it in the midst of activity.<\/p>\nI began this talk with one of my favorite poems, written by Rumi back in the 13th century. His full name is Jal\u0101l ad-D\u012bn Mohammad R\u016bm\u012b. His words have echoed across the centuries, and for good reason. May they continue echoing, here and now.<\/p>\n\u201cLast night \nI begged the Wise One to tell me \nThe secret of the world. \nGently, gently he whispered, \n\u201cBe quiet, \nThe secret cannot be spoken, \nIt is wrapped in silence.\u201d<\/p>\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/gdVjVtpr55M\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\u00a0 WRAPPED IN SILENCE Mo Myokan Weinhardt Senior Dharma Teacher Empty Moon Zen Last night I begged the Wise One to tell me The secret of the world. Gently, gently he whispered, \u201cBe quiet, The secret cannot be spoken, It is wrapped in silence.\u201d Here we are together, a day and a half deep into […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":120,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28906","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n<title>Wrapped in Silence: A Zen Reflection<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"  WRAPPED IN SILENCE Mo Myokan Weinhardt Senior Dharma Teacher Empty Moon Zen Last night I begged the Wise One to tell me The secret of the world.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Wrapped in Silence: A Zen Reflection\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"  WRAPPED IN SILENCE Mo Myokan Weinhardt Senior Dharma Teacher Empty Moon Zen Last night I begged the Wise One to tell me The secret of the world.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Monkey Mind\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/james.ford.1029\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-08-05T14:56:30+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-08-05T14:57:36+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/81\/2021\/08\/coastal-oregon-300x225.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"James Ford\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"James Ford\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"9 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html\",\"name\":\"Wrapped in Silence: A Zen Reflection\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2021-08-05T14:56:30+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-08-05T14:57:36+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/#\/schema\/person\/3f37f475fb5078d1e7faa93a63a0fddb\"},\"description\":\"  WRAPPED IN SILENCE Mo Myokan Weinhardt Senior Dharma Teacher Empty Moon Zen Last night I begged the Wise One to tell me The secret of the world.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/2021\/08\/wrapped-in-silence-a-zen-reflection.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Wrapped in Silence: A Zen Reflection\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/\",\"name\":\"Monkey Mind\",\"description\":\"Easily distracted...\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/#\/schema\/person\/3f37f475fb5078d1e7faa93a63a0fddb\",\"name\":\"James Ford\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/monkeymind\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/fa18971b225a3bb79f0c4c381a5fae20?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/fa18971b225a3bb79f0c4c381a5fae20?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"James Ford\"},\"description\":\"James Ishmael Ford is a writer and spiritual director. 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