{"id":461,"date":"2009-07-06T20:53:00","date_gmt":"2009-07-06T20:53:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/mormontherapist\/2009\/07\/do-you-have-any-suggestions-on-how-i-could-soften-his-heart\/"},"modified":"2009-07-06T20:53:00","modified_gmt":"2009-07-06T20:53:00","slug":"do-you-have-any-suggestions-on-how-i-could-soften-his-heart","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/mormontherapist\/2009\/07\/do-you-have-any-suggestions-on-how-i-could-soften-his-heart.html","title":{"rendered":"Do you have any suggestions on how I could soften his heart?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

To give a little background, I was married in the temple about 8 years ago. My husband and I had a baby girl 16 months ago, and shortly after she was born my husband told me that he didn\u2019t believe in the church and wanted nothing more do do with it. This struggle has been hard enough, but now my daughter is coming up on the age where she can start going to nursery. I\u2019ve brought up this fact several times with my husband and asked him if he is against me taking her there, as well as I\u2019d like to start saying nightly prayers with her. He won\u2019t give me a straight answer because he knows how important it is to me, but I know his preference would be that I NOT take her to church with me and that I NOT pray with her. He has explained his concerns, and I understand where he\u2019s coming from, but quite frankly this is not an area I\u2019m willing to give up. I don\u2019t want this to be a source of contention in our marriage, but I can\u2019t emphasize enough how important it is to me that I do the best I can to raise my daughter with a gospel knowledge. There are so many wonderful things that the church can do for young children, but he seems focused on the \u201cbrainwashing<\/span>.\u201d<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Do you have any suggestions on how I could soften his heart? Ideally I want him to support me in taking her to church and praying with her \u2013 I don\u2019t want it to be a sore spot for him \u2013 but I\u2019m not willing to let my daughter grow up without knowing what I believe.<\/p>\n


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Help. <\/span><\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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I am sorry you are finding yourself in this difficult situation. The best way to get through this type of problem is using the incredibly useful tool of respectful yet firm communication<\/span>. Delaying the conversation<\/span> you and your husband need to have regarding the very important issue of how you plan to raise your daughter is not helpful to either of you. It is important for you to remember that you have just as much say on how you want your daughter raised as your husband does. Just like you are not going to be able to stop his influence and teachings, he will not be able to stop yours. The things I think are critical for the two of you to discuss include:<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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