Several times throughout your blog you have said, \u201cSex should not hurt!\u201d But, my question is: What if I want it to hurt? I feel like the only way I can orgasm is if there is an element of pain involved in sexual intimacy and the rougher the better. I have several issues\/questions surrounding this:<\/em><\/p>\n 1) As a child I experienced sexual abuse that involved bondage, violence and forced orgasm \u2014 does this pain \u201cfetish\u201d somehow mean I liked the abuse? I can see that the two are related but have finally come to a place where I can have sex and keep it separate from old memories\/stay mentally present\/etc. and the need for pain seems to have evolved from self-punishment driven to truly pleasure-enhancing. Am I a freak for feeling this way?<\/em><\/p>\n 2) How does this fit into LDS teachings about how we are supposed to treat our bodies? How does it fit into what is known about normal human sexuality? Is it morally wrong to want this? Is it unhealthy to want this (provided there is no long term damage\/serious injury)?<\/em><\/p>\n <\/em>3)My kind husband feels conflicted and uncomfortable with this and is unwilling to cause me pain but also laments my lack of orgasms. <\/em><\/p>\n Possible directions I see are to either have a painless, orgasmless sex life; learn how to enjoy sex without pain, but how? and what if I truly do like pain?; or somehow find a way to feel pain that doesn\u2019t make my husband uncomfortable, but, again, how?<\/em><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n This is a great question so thanks for posting it!\u00a0 I\u2019m going to try and start answering questions in shorter format than I normally do \u2013 so I can answer more of them \u2013 so please bear with me.<\/p>\n Thoughts:<\/p>\n