{"id":15,"date":"2011-07-19T19:35:00","date_gmt":"2011-07-19T19:35:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/19\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back\/"},"modified":"2011-07-19T19:35:00","modified_gmt":"2011-07-19T19:35:00","slug":"getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html","title":{"rendered":"Getting My Ramadan Mojo Back"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

Salaam Alaikum wa Rahmatullah<\/p>\n

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim<\/p>\n

Okay, I have a confession to make.\u00a0 I rarely have a good Ramadan.\u00a0 What is supposed to be a month of spirituality, sacrifice, contemplation, and joy has usually been for me well, kinda like every other month of the year.\u00a0 My husband, bless his heart, is not an organizer and not the kind of person who himself will \u201cupsell\u201d the season or try to ramp us up.\u00a0 I am the one who says \u201cLet\u2019s get off caffeine and fast on Monday and Thursday to start preparing for Ramadan\u201d.\u00a0 He happily goes along, but he doesn\u2019t usually initiate changes.\u00a0 I miss this because I am NOT a natural leader.\u00a0 I\u2019ll be happy to follow along and if someone tells me there\u2019s something to do and when to be there, I\u2019ll be there early and eagerly.\u00a0 Sadly, this is not my life.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
It seems like every Ramadan sneaks up on me unawares.\u00a0 First of all, I\u2019ve been pregnant or nursing for about the last six years or so.\u00a0 I have had pregnancies where I am \u201chigh risk\u201d so it was inadvisable for me to fast.\u00a0 I tried a couple of times and ended up alarming my doctor, so I said \u201cAlhamdulillah ala kulli hal\u201d and figured I\u2019d make it up later.\u00a0 Well, now it\u2019s later.\u00a0 My youngest is a vibrant busy one year old who eats table food and nurses as much for comfort as nutrition.\u00a0 I am, as far as I know (ya Rabb) not pregnant.\u00a0 Don\u2019t ask me about the cat, though\u2026\u00a0 Anyway, this year I can fast, so I\u2019m hoping that will help me to participate more.\u00a0 Fasting in summer is not going to be easy but that\u2019s kinda the point.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Spiritually I\u2019ve not been plugged in to the Muslim community for a long, long time.\u00a0 I\u2019m Facebook and Twitter; most of the ladies, lovely though they are, are not plugged in that way.\u00a0 I tried handing out business cards when I first moved here.\u00a0 I tried to get a sisters\u2019 halaqah started.\u00a0 I\u2019ve called, cajoled, had my husband talk to their husbands.\u00a0 Eventually I just didn\u2019t try much anymore.\u00a0 And it\u2019s a shame, because the sisters in my town are nice.\u00a0 Just insular, I guess.\u00a0 There are a few ladies who are pretty much on the same wavelength as I am and we keep in touch, but with five kids it\u2019s very challenging for me to get out and about.\u00a0 So I\u2019m isolated from the community, and that\u2019s never a good thing.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
It also seems that somehow the Shaitan gets super-busy in the runup to Ramadan and he gets in between my husband and me.\u00a0 We always have some sort of a dustup around this time of year.\u00a0 Eventually it gets sorted out but it certainly puts us in a bad mood and then we\u2019re both ticked off and ignoring each other so no one orders dates or calls to see if there\u2019s a lecturer coming to the masjid that night.\u00a0 <\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
It\u2019s hard trying to make Ramadan meaningful in the U.S.\u00a0 I don\u2019t have the vast Muslim populace around me to bolster my mood or help me get into a routine.\u00a0 For most everyone, it\u2019s just summer.\u00a0 Hot, muggy, summer.\u00a0 People are talking swimming, pool parties, beerfests, and barbecues.\u00a0 I\u2019m thinking fasting, iftar, tarawih (which I haven\u2019t gone to in years), and how in the heck am I going to get up for suhoor when the baby still isn\u2019t sleeping through the night.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
So, there it is.\u00a0 That\u2019s my confession.\u00a0 Ramadan has been a time of stress and isolation instead of a time of piety and community.\u00a0 A lot of it is my fault; a lot of it is situational.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t get out when I had a passel of little kids.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t spend a lot of money on clothing or extra food or decorations.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t do a lot, so I didn\u2019t do much of anything.\u00a0 Sad, huh?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Well, this year I will try to be different.\u00a0 I plan to push myself to get it together, prepare, get out of the house, go to the masjid for tarawih and iftaar at least a few times, host a couple of iftaars, and work with the kids to give them a sense of what we are doing and why.\u00a0 Alhamdulillah, this year I am fasting.\u00a0 Alhamdulillah, they recently started a sisters\u2019 halaqah at the masjid and I\u2019m set to attend on Thursday, inshaAllah.\u00a0 Alhamdulillah, we already earmarked money to have an Eid party for the kids at home, which we decided to do as an alternative to birthday parties.\u00a0 Alhamdulillah, I am starting, fitfully, to work with the kids, taking them aside for a few minutes a day to tell them what Ramadan is and to teach the boys the 99 Names of Allah.\u00a0 Alhamdullillah, I am planning on getting a sitter for the kids so hubby and I can go up to the main Muslim center of the area to stock up before the fasting begins, and I am already thinking about outfits for the kids.\u00a0 I plan inshaAllah to get a nice abaya for myself, too, inshaAllah.\u00a0 Mentally, I think I am better prepared and even though I am still struggling with low moods I am getting better at bulling my way through it and not letting it stop me in my tracks.\u00a0 And I\u2019m really, really going to bite my tongue and not say anything that might conceivably be taken the wrong way by my husband so we don\u2019t have a spat.\u00a0 <\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
There\u2019s no telling if these good intentions will survive the month, but at least I\u2019m aware of the challenges and I think I have the tools to make this Ramadan a much better one than previously.\u00a0 Now, if I can make it through Ramadan and to the Eid, maybe, just maybe I\u2019ll figure out a way to make everyone be quiet so I can actually hear the Eid khutbah.\u00a0 Hmmm\u2026.that might be asking for too much\u2026.<\/div>\n
\"\"<\/div>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Salaam Alaikum wa Rahmatullah Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim Okay, I have a confession to make.\u00a0 I rarely have a good Ramadan.\u00a0 What is supposed to be a month of spirituality, sacrifice, contemplation, and joy has usually been for me well, kinda like every other month of the year.\u00a0 My husband, bless his heart, is not an […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":81,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nGetting My Ramadan Mojo Back<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Salaam Alaikum wa RahmatullahBismillahi Rahmani RahimOkay, I have a confession to make.  I rarely have a good Ramadan.  What is supposed to be a\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Getting My Ramadan Mojo Back\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Salaam Alaikum wa RahmatullahBismillahi Rahmani RahimOkay, I have a confession to make.  I rarely have a good Ramadan.  What is supposed to be a\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Muslimah in Progress\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-07-19T19:35:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/blogger.googleusercontent.com\/tracker\/8276196425188955527-6848560386903243888?l=muslimahinprogress.blogspot.com\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Nancy Qualls-Shehata\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Nancy Qualls-Shehata\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html\",\"name\":\"Getting My Ramadan Mojo Back\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-19T19:35:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-07-19T19:35:00+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/#\/schema\/person\/6218cbef696f8f6c933831dfcc2096b9\"},\"description\":\"Salaam Alaikum wa RahmatullahBismillahi Rahmani RahimOkay, I have a confession to make.  I rarely have a good Ramadan.  What is supposed to be a\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/2011\/07\/getting-my-ramadan-mojo-back.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Getting My Ramadan Mojo Back\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/muslimahinprogress\/\",\"name\":\"Muslimah in Progress\",\"description\":\"I'm an American Muslimah of a certain age with some pretty strong opinions. 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